Results
17. Iron Chef Maharu Morimoto v Maya Amano - Subaquatic Basketweaving IIIII III/I
18. Squirrel Girl v Hrathgar, Elantris - Desert Survival TIII/III
19. Brock Sampson v Calvin, not Hobbes - Footrace IIII/IIIII I
20. Luca Blight v Shion Uzuki - Being Mysterious /IIIII IIIII I
21. Dr. McNinja v Mandark, Dexter's Lab - Censoring Vietnamese Cable IIIII/I
22. Maya Schodinger v Xena, Warrior Princess - Abridging IIIII I/IIII
23. Egon Venkler v Puniyo - Master Baiting II/III
24. John Conner v K-9 - Thumb Wrestling IIIII III/III
And so we have our first tiebreak, fittingly involving Hatbot since I didn't care enough to use my vote myself.
Pool D
Match 25
Ah the swimsuit contest, where hot bods get scantily clad for a show you won't want to miss. That said, sorry guys, but this show ain't for you. That's right, forget the cheesecake, and bring on the beefcakes for our all male, chippendale showdown.
Our first contestant is a forceful entry from a galaxy far, far away. Luke Skywalker grew up on a desert planet, which probably taught him plenty about beating the heat, if not how to swim, which means it's a good thing this isn't a swimming contest. Other than that, his constant training to be a Jedi Master means that he'll be in top condition, and have a grace few can match.
Which is good, since no matter how strong he might be, there's no way he's beating the 18/99 Strength his opponent is packing. Straight from the wilds of Faerun, we have the famed ranger, Minsc, and his miniature giant space hamster, Boo! Despite being the very image of a fantasy berserker, Minsc is still more comfortable in chain than a loincloth, but just for today ladies, we're getting an exception.
And so which specimin of manliness can show off the best while they beat the heat.
Match 26
Some matches test physical prowess, others wit, and a blessed few seem to favour only sheer bloody minded luck. But today, we celebrate the taste and vision of the artiste. Where thought meets the imperfect tools known as scriptwriters and actors, and allows those mediocre hacks to join with your muse to achive a taste of divinity itself. But, when visions clash, only one can reign supreme.
A being of supreme vision, the Prince of All Cosmos has seen just about everything, he's also rolled it up, too! And, if he even remotely takes after his father, then his style and flair will be without compare, as he crafts a one of a kind masterpiece that'll leave folks scratching their heads for months to come.
But his supreme vision is met with the impecable taste of Miles Edgeworth, Ace Prosecutor. His magnum opus, Murder in Lavender, will undoubtedly be a tale of death in the big city, and of the valient, if conflicted, prosecutor who braves corrupt officials, inept investigators, and pesky defense attournies to bring the truth to the light of day, whatever the cost. Whether it be his job, or having to deal with the most annoying witness in the history of the courts.
Match 27
Sax and Violins, this classic punchline joins the ranks of "What do you think it means" challenges. However, in its debut as a challenge, it got a pairing that couldn't be better for it's creative music roots.
After all, if you gotta have sax and violins, can there be any better poster boy for the whole thing than that groovy 60's superspy and generally shagtastic cat, Austin Powers? This swinging spy is loaded for bear, with his mojo set to 11, plenty of groupies to get in the groove, and a whole collection of tools, mentionable and un, to make sure he wins in the end.
Austin is truly a powerhouse at Sax and Violins, but if there's ever gonna be a team with the animal passion necessary to beat him, it'll be the Wyld Stallions. Bill S. Preston, and Theodore Logan, esquire, are here to make sure that Austin Powers stays history, as they usher in the new future of rock and brotherhood. And with a little help from their friends, past and future, they'll show why you should never underestimate the boys from San Diemas.
Match 28
Taunting and Gloating, some might see these as two separate things. But in reality, they're basically just two different ways of letting your enemies know just how much they suck, and why you're totally superior to them. And today, we'll see which of these two can best roast their foes with a well placed flame.
Dennis Nedry is the kind of guy who has a bit of flair when writing his resignation letter. Granted, he didn't do it in person, but he did leave his boss stranded on an island with hungry dinosaurs after scuttling the only real way to control them. Now, that he also got eaten by a dinosaur just goes to show that he wasn't perfect, but he at least had the balls to try.
And he's up against the Heavy from TF2. Now, I'm speaking from a position of complete ignorance here, but even if TF2 characters have enough personality to taunt, the Heavy seems... middle of the pack? I mean, the spy is made to taunt that sneaky little bastard. And others, like the medic, just seem too squeaky clean to want to taunt. But, surely his questional skills are enough to win out over dino chow, right?
Match 29
We all know the story, in the shadows there exist vast shadow organizations, keeping the truth that can harm them and liberate man hidden that they might complete their nefarious schemes. These dark Illuminati then pull the world to their whims with invisible strings, until one lone torchbearer grabs their sacred flame of truth, and with fire singed hands and a hunted heart, brings the light unto the people. And now, our contestants must be that hero.
This will prove to be a bit of an issue for our first contestant, the Angel Islington, since he is, for all intents and purposes, an Illuminati himself. Whether that makes him uniquely suited for this task or uniquely unsuited is the real question. What is less questionable is his ability to deal with any threats as his personal power is profound.
Against him is a somewhat less powerful creature. Suezo is used to roving the world with his monster rancher pal, so playing the hero is old hat for him. And having the mantle of the fool, telling the truth whatever the consequences is also second nature for him. Of course, this also means he may have some issues being taken seriously, and he'll still need to be worried about that whole evading the Illuminati thing. Though, at least he also has a hero's luck, so he'll be hoping on that to pull through and get him the win.
Match 30
Hail to the King, baby! Last time we had our Elvis Impersonation contest we had a coupla hunka hunks o' burning love rocking the stage in their blue suede shoes. Sadly, this time, all we've got are a couple a hound dogs, each hoping their crying is enough to keep 'em from getting the jailhouse blues.
Our first contestant is at least used to going by several names, but that won't be near enough for a pretty stoic blond guy with a fetish for keeping his eyes covered, whether it be with shades, or a mask. However, Char Anzabel has connections, which is why he'll be showing up in the Elvis Gundam. This mechanical marvel can not only wreck five inferior Federation GMs per pelvis thrust, but it also looks exactly like Elvis so long as you can get over it being fifty feet tall and having a V Crest in the middle of its forehead.
Against this is Hagrid who cannot rely on any mechanical marvels, but has magic on his side to make up for this. Of course, while this Hogwarts Groundskeeper is expert at dealing with magical beasts, he's never shown himself especially apt with disguises or muggle studies, so there's no telling what he'll actually think Elvis is. But it should be a sight to behold, regardless of how it turns out.
Match 31
Any schlub can be a good aim with a ranged weapon, what separates the good from the great isn't making the critical shot, it's making the shot in style. And so our competitors will be given their choice of ranged weapons, and given three shots to make the trickiest shot they can and still hit a called target. No hit, no points.
Of course, to our first contestant, the idea of needing three shots is blasphemy. With his policy of holding only to the Rule of One, his rallying cry with be One Shot, One Victory. And who else could make this claim but the great and mighty overlord of the DL, Jogurt.
But, Garland intends to take this puffed up despot and knock him down, with, well... just about anything. Garland isn't noted for his ability with long range attacks, being a freaking knight in FF1, and Dissidia giving him very few long range options. But how hard can it be to best a rodent with a 1 in every stat?
Match 32
Some say it's more soap opera than sport, but the WWF is still 100% wrestling. And now we have two fine contenders for the title bout.
Oscar the Grouch may not be much of a fighter, but he's got the temperment of a star. Not only is he the meanest one on his street, but there's few folks that can trash talk quite like him, or egg on the crowd.
But his opponent is a master of combat, even if his taunting stays mostly inside his head. Mat Cauthon arrives on the scene, ready to play the unwilling hero to Oscar's scenery chewing villain. But will he get his happy ending?
Quick Vote Form
25. Luke Skywalker v Minsc - Swimsuit Contest
26. Prince of all Cosmos v Miles Edgeworth - Direct a Movie
27. Bill and Ted v Austin Powers - Sax and Violins
28. Dennis Nedry v Heavy, TF2 - Taunting/Gloating
29. Angel Islington v Suezo, Monster Rancher - Evade the Illuminati and Discover the Truth
30. Char Anzabel v Hagrid - Elvis Impersonation
31. Jogurt v Garland, FF1 - Trick Shooting
32. Oscar the Grouch v Mat Cauthon - WWF Wrestling
