I apologize this is late, but you cannot rush greatness...
Last week, on the Ultimate Tournament of Ultimate Doom Part IV...
Semi-finals. Many have tried, few make it. Those who do make it face the toughest challenges known to man...talking horses...dancing penguins...cyborg police officers...annoying little girls...even Gary Coleman. But despite the challenges, some have risen to the top to take their place in the great circle of random tournaments. These remaining, brave souls have fought long and hard. But do they have what it takes to defeat each other? Do they have the desire to truly win?
Bestiality Division vs.
Rikki-Tikki-Tavi (see name) vs. Mothra (Godzilla)While it may not seem fair for a little mongoose to face off against a flying beast, looks can be very deceiving. Rikki-Tikki-Tavi has proven time and time again to be one of the toughest, most successful fighters in existence. And he's a children's book character - surely he can't be killed. But Mothra might be more than he can chew - moths are fair play, but moths the size of skyscrapers are a different story. Does size matter, or will diminuitiveness prove to be the deciding factor of this battle?
vs.
Firkraag (Baldur's Gate) vs. Kermit the Frog (Muppets)Once more, a battle between size is under way here. A dragon versus a frog might seem simple, but looks, again, are very deceiving. Kermit's fought gigantic beasts before and brought them down before. However...will the intelligent Firkraag succumb to the frog's tricks? Will the power of pork be enough to stop the ferrifying dragon? Only time and a whole lot of mental trauma for little children can tell.
Supernatural Division vs.
Typing of the Dead Typist (Typing of the Dead) vs. Ash (Evil Dead)The power of the pen vs. the power of the gun. Old adages must now challenge each other for the title of King, and Ash isn't ready to give up that title any time soon. While words may not be his greatest strength, but it's hard to argue with a boomstick and a chainsaw to the face. But Ash is a dangerously short name, and the Typist has proven himself very skilled at typing small words thus far...
vs.
Yugi Muto (Yu-Gi-Oh!) vs. Manuel "Manny" Calavera (Grim Fandango)The power of the cards has kept Yugi alive throughout the tournament thus far. With completely bullshit attacks, he's downed some powerful foes. However, will the power of 4Kids allow him to face off and defeat a true reaper? Manny's not the typical reaper, but while he might not cut your soul into pieces, he might send you on a trip to New Jersey. And believe me, that's not a place any sane person would ever want to go near...
Mechanical Division vs.
Megatron (Transformers) vs. Dist (Tales of the Abyss) Taking on many forms, Megatron has barrelled through every foe he's fought along the way. Using his genius and teetering sanity, Dist has outsmarted every one of his foes so far. Power and brains now go head-to-head as Megatron, leader of the Decepticons, and Dist, the Rose, face off in a battle to the death. Only one will come out alive - will Dist's chair prove to be the deciding factor, or will Megatron gun down the mad scientist?
vs.
Bender (Futurama) vs. Megaman (Megaman)Unlike the other foes Megaman has fought so far, Bender does not have normal robot master weaknesses - greed, booze, and sex are very difficult to weaponize. Of course, Bender's not good for combat outside of bending things. An amoral metallic asshole vs. a cute little blue darling. Innocence and childhood face off against age and world weariness. Which robot will come out on top?
Epic Division vs.
Darth Vader (Star Wars) vs. William Shakespeare (Real Life)The Dark Side has crushed the Epic Division thus far, but has it met its match? Shakespeare's combat ability isn't much, but if there's anything that can drive a Dark Lord of the Sith mad, it might very well be listening to a Midsummer Night's Dream ad infinitum. Is it truly Shakespeare who is a master of the Dark Side, or does Darth Vader have what it takes to smite the Bard of Stratford-upon-Avon, one of the world's greatest writers? Only time will tell...
vs.
Pheonix Wright (Phoenix Wright) vs. Luther Lansfeld (SO3) The finger of accusation is a powerful weapon indeed - but is it enough to save the world from deletion? The mad programmer Luther has deleted some of history's most powerful people, but he's been defeated by video games before, so this match is anyone's game. Who will win? Who will prove themselves to be the real master of the Eternal Sphere? Is this tournament becoming to philosophical for you now? What is a man? Am I a butterfly?
Short Form:
Rikki-Tikki Tavi vs. Mothra
Firkraag vs. Kermit
Typing of the Dead vs. Ash
Yugi vs. Manny
Megatron vs. Dist
Bender vs. Megaman
Darth Vader vs. Shakespeare
Phoenix vs. Luther
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