Cor Blimey! This week the ol' hero Yangus gets to face off against... what the heck? Some guy in a bandanna? Wot's all this then? 'Ere 'e is, thinkin' e's an ol' master o' the blade or some nonsense? Well, Yangus 'ere will teach 'im a lesson 'e won't be forgetting! With a swing of 'is trusty Axe, poor Locke's ain't got a prayer in the 'eavens. A Big Banga or a Hatchet Man will send 'im reeling! Not only that, but Grimmer Reaper and Parallax send the poor soul runnin' back to 'is 'ome, cryin' like a little babe!
(If you want to take the accent out it's OK)