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Author Topic: Bonus Match preparation.  (Read 4330 times)

Grefter

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Bonus Match preparation.
« on: December 21, 2007, 10:27:07 PM »
Edit - Tai handled Week 6
« Last Edit: January 06, 2008, 03:17:21 PM by Grefter »
NO MORE POKEMON - Meeplelard.
The king perfect of the DL is and always will be Excal. - Superaielman
Don't worry, just jam it in anyway. - SirAlex
Gravellers are like, G-Unit - Trancey.

Shale

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #1 on: December 22, 2007, 02:50:19 AM »
Season 40 Week 4

Rising Waters
- By Snowfire

On Dryad's Day of the third week in the year 1007 of the Ajorian calendar, Gobi decided to become a villain.

A word of explanation.  The humble Gobi is far from villainous by nature.  No, he was willing to troop out with Ryu's band for the cause of Visiting Random Places and Righting Wrongs.  Nobody forced him to do this; he could have stayed at home in Prima and run his shop.  Gobi just wanted to do his part in the general Quest for Goodness, even if doing so meant Karn devouring his soul half the time.

But there are limits.  Lines that should not be crossed.

Gobi never expected to conquer the Dueling League.  He would just play his bit part.  Maybe get to the finals of a Light Championship, then lose a close match dramatically but with honor.  Sell some memorabilia to the inevitable underdog fans.  But no.  Gobi was denied even this.  He was a winless laughingstock.  Taloon and Ramus - far from fearsome duelists themselves - had even kicked him out of the Capitalist Clubbing Club for dragging their record down.

Only one conclusion could be drawn from this.

The world - nay, the whole DL - must be submerged beneath the watery depths.  Then, and only then, would Light tremble in fear of the might of EbbX!  And be forced to take matches with Gobi at least somewhat seriously!

Gobi's first stab at this villainous plan ended in failure.  See, he thought perhaps he could force that dancing Moogle to perform the Water Rondo constantly and sink the dueling arena into endless blue.  So Gobi approached Emperor Geshtal about buying a Slave Crown, and perhaps some Imperial troopers to hunt that Returner Mog down.  Geshtal agreed to do the deal in exchange for some discounted MagiTech armor...  which Gobi soon discovered he had no way of acquiring, even on the black market.  Technology was just too backward on his home world.  After letting Guardians toy with Gobi, Geshtal Mertoned him to ashes and tossed the charred remains into the Serpent Trench.

While undergoing his painful recuperation, Gobi had a long time to read up on the topic.  Surely there has to have been <i>somebody</i> who had tried such a plan before, and gotten it to work.  Hmm...  a bit obscure, but perhaps this Xagor fellow from Final Fantasy Legend III?  He had apparently been defeated by some young time travelers (as usual), but before that, he did set up monster-filled water to pour from the Pure Land on the unsuspecting people below.  Now that he was gone, perhaps some person could steal the now abandoned Pure Land water gate...  or some fish...  or some person-fish...  and become the MASTER OF EVENTUAL HYDROLOGICAL DOOM.

Gobi set to work.

------------

"Princess Ashe?  The book on magical irrigation arrived from the interplanar library."

At least there were some benefits to this recent contact, Ashe thought.  The desert parts of Dalmasca could certainly use more water.  She'd been in negotiations with some extraplanar organization called "The Dueling League" about possibly renting out some of her mightiest warriors to win gil and honor.  The problem was, she and her friends were either pathetic Lights or nigh-unstoppable Godlikes, and discussions as to which it'd be were still ongoing.

But as for the book...  what on earth?   It was scribbled on all over!  With notes in margins.  "Soon, I shall have ultimate power!"  "Then, they'll pay."  "The beginning of my reign shall be celebrated with rain!"  Aside from the mad rantings, there were detailed cross-references with an archeology textbook to a world she'd never heard of, and plans for reverse-engineering infinite water from the techniques in the book.  Somebody had <i>way</i> too much time on their hands, almost as if they'd had nothing to do but obsess over books for months.

Well, clearly Ashe had to act.  Not only had he returned the book to the library with ranting intact, the would-be villain had left a circled location on the map with a note saying "perfect location for a hidden lair!"  There's pretty much only one thing for a heroic princess to do in these situations: charge in alone and solve things once and for all.  Ashe strapped on her Longsword and Estucheon, and left a message explaining she'd be back shortly.

*It's Gobi.  Even if he hides in an aquarium, Ashe slices up some fresh sushi with embarrassing ease.
*As per tradition, the princess is captured.  Also as per tradition, a mob of lustful heroes makes short work of the would-be AquaLord.
*BWAHAHAHAHA EBBX ECOX EBBX
"Sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology."
-Ponder Stibbons

[23:02] <Veryslightlymad> CK dreams about me starring in porno?
[23:02] <CmdrKing> Pretty sure.

Jo'ou Ranbu

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #2 on: December 29, 2007, 02:23:49 AM »
Casting Call
~ By Gatewalker

Slipping into the 7th Heaven bar, Ryu the Fifth felt a little silly that he was being so careful and secretive. After all, it was just a simple meeting with a director. However, Nadir insisted on absolute secrecy before he would reveal his latest find - which he claimed would 'revolutionize' the entire process of casting a play. And now, he was about to make himself feel even sillier just to find out what the eccentric man had up his sleeve.

Moving nonchalantly up to the bar, Ryu could at least take some solace in the fact that it was very early in the afternoon and nobody really frequented bars at this hour, so he didn't have to say this in front of a lot of people. Nodding to Tifa to get her attention, the ranger sighed and mumbled as she approached, "Lady, I've got a blind date with destiny. And it looks like she's ordered the lobster."

As he spoke, Tifa just sighed. "Nad, er, the 'masked man's' guest, right? He's been in the basement for the last hour spouting off random quotes and waiting for you. Seems pretty nervous about something. Anyway, the way down is right over there. Have fun, or something."

Shrugging, Ryu moved over to the pinball machine and rode the not-so-secret elevator down to the basement, where he was immediately greeted by Nadir's hissed questioning. "Quickly man, send it back up! Were you followed? Have you spoken of this meeting to anyone? Answer me man!" The hissing was, of course accompanied by dramatic gesturing and pointing.

"In order, I'm already sending it up, no I wasn't, no I haven't, and will you just chill out?" Shaking his head, Ryu moved over to a chair and had a seat, eyeing a suspicious object covered by a cloth on a nearby table. "So, what is this secret meeting all about anyway? Why the paranoia?"

Once the elevator clicked back up, Nadir seemed to relax a bit and moved over to stand next to the table where the cloth-covered object rested. "The reason? Why, my good friend, the reason for all this secrecy is nothing less..." With his usual flair, the masked stage director pulled the cloth from the table, leaving the object it covered in plain view. "... than THIS!"

Ryu looked at the object, and then looked back up at Nadir with a raised eyebrow, rather clearly unimpressed.

"It's a hat."

And it most assuredly was a hat. A simple-looking top hat, black and unadorned, though for all of its simplicity, Ryu began to get a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach as he observed it.

Nadir smiled at this observation (or at least Ryu imagined him smiling behind that mask), and leaned over conspiratorially. "Ah, but this is no ordinary hat, my friend. This is a wondrous work of magic and technology, a mechanical hat with the powers of pure chaos and ultimate authority bound into its workings. This is a item of such power that its very existence must never be spoken of beyond the two of us, or surely those who would abuse its power will seek to steal it away!"

This only furthered both the confusion and unease the Ranger was suffering from. "So...it's some kind of robotic hat. Right. Uh, what exactly does it do, Nadir? And what does it have to do with me?"

"Can't you see? We use its power of randomness to cast a play, and those who it casts are bound to act! It is the ultimate test of art in the masses! What could be better then casting parts at random to allow those who would not have the courage to audition to experience the making of art?!"

Now, Ryu was really not sure about this, and the ranger promptly spoke up.

"What do you mean, 'bound to act'? You mean if this hat throws out a name, they have no choice? Doesn't that sound kind of... evil, taking away free will like that?"

Now, Nadir shook his head sadly, dramatically so. "Ah, in some hands it would be, and that is why I insisted on the secrecy. But we would use it only for casting plays. And really, what harm can come to someone for acting in a play, even against their own will? It is a chance to have people broaden their horizons, and get the whole world into acting. Is that not a noble goal?"

"I still don't like it, but... I see where you're coming from. All right, we'll try it out once, and if I don't like the results, I crush the thing and we forget this ever happened. Deal?"

Taking a bow, Nadir agreed.

"You have my word. Now, did you bring what I asked for?"

Nodding, Ryu pulled out a quartet of folders. "Yeah, my latest manuscripts. Here." Handing them over to Nadir, he then returned his scrutiny to the device. "So, how does this work, anyway?"

Taking the scripts, Nadir neatly rolled them up and fed them into the hat, one by one. "Like so. Now, we just wait for it to pick one to use and give us our cast..."

- Steiner as the rakish bandit and Kanon as the helpless princess? Oh, this’ll be amusing.
- Sometimes, silence isn't golden. Like when you have Crono and Tir staring in a comedy musical. 
- Terra and Albedo star in Peach's Castle, a children’s musical. Trainwreck in the making.
- The machine is inadultered evil. Ryu5 himself must star opposite Bowser in a risqué romance drama.
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> HEY
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> LAGGY
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> UVIET?!??!?!
[01:08] <Laggy> YA!!!!!!!!!1111111111
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> OMG!!!!
[01:08] <Chulianne> No wonder you're small.
[01:08] <TranceHime> cocks
[01:08] <Laggy> .....

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #3 on: January 05, 2008, 04:40:40 AM »
A small notice was scattered throughout the league; placed in every palace, every bar, every locker room, every last nook and crany of the DL nexus. From Sephiroth's ballroom, where countless masses had come to celebrate his successes. To Edge Eblan's trap riddled castle, where the sound of the note being dropped interrupted his current insane plan. All the way to the very edge of the universe, where the TimeLord's small pocket realm was housed. In the space of a few hours, everyone had been notified. A small message. Barely worth noticing....

"The Duelling League will be shut down for one season after this week. Please do not panic, we will be back in six weeks."- Management.


It's as if they wanted to see how big a riot they could create.

---

Friends and foes all clashed in a mad dash to during the riots.What would happen without the league? Would.. things vanish? Would they all slowly fade back to their own universes, the wonderful highs and lows forgotten? Would they be nothing more than a fond memory, fading into nothing? NO. The best the DL had to offer would put a stop to this madness and rioting, even at the cost of life and limb. And so, the best the DL had to offer stepped up and tried to put a stop to things. With the backing of the DL police, five warriors stepped forward. Each was a part of the DL in spirit, and had done much to improve things over the seasons.

- Yuna, summoner of Spira. The lady emphases the raw power of spirit and the control of the hero, smashing many bosses and overcoming much during her stay in the Duelling League. She was going to crush these riots like a bad fanfic turned into a sequel no one cared to remember.

- Edge, Prince and guardian of the Ninja Kingdom of Eblan.  He may not win on the first try.. or the fifth... still. His unwillingness to accept defeat in the face of overwhelming odds, sanity and all reason, along with his resourcefulness and ability to stand up and even best far stronger foes shows that the mind can be stronger than the body or facts. If there's someone who knows how to handle large mobs with murderous intent that specifically want to tear him apart, it's Edge.

- Nate. Because it's Nate flippin' Nanjo, controller of BtS and owner of half the DL proper. You don't mess with money.  His game of origin may not have the flash of a Final Fantasy game, it hasn't stopped him from becoming one of the best known and most powerful Godlike around. He's not going to let these losers wreck his studio again!

-Justin and Rune. One provides the brains, the other muscle. Justin's mix of masterful sword fighting and complete immunity to logic and scheming have frustrated his Esper rival over the years, foiling countless plans without realizing it. Meanwhile Rune's done his best to stop the overwhelming stupid of Justin from destroying the universe, and sometimes even succeeding at beating logic into Justin's head. Although rivals, the two have turned into somewhat easy allies countless times over the years, and work well together. They'll need both their combined powers to stand up and crush those who would tear down all that's been built up.

Can these five stop the chaos that threatens everything? They're terribly outnumbered even with the backing of the DL police, and facing some of the strongest characters in the RPG multiverse together.

-The fab five quell the riots
-The heroes are no Riskbreakers, and thus fall to the rioters

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #4 on: March 01, 2008, 05:03:16 AM »
The Obscured Visage
-SnowFire

"Here!  Here at this ancient ceremonial site, deep in the Qlippoth, I shall make my stand!  Fate, karma, the Score, and even the True Runes have no power over this wretched life!"  The Masked Bishop drew out a dagger and made the markings on the altar.  "It is too late to stop these events now."

"My fellow replica, " the mysterious masked God-General Sync intoned as sonorously as a psuedo-13 year old could, "the time to free ourselves from this dark future by killing everyone else is now.  Soon, our terrible destinies shall be..."

The violins suddenly cut, and tinny yet heroic music began to play in the background.  A muscular warrior in a stylish butterfly mask stepped out from behind a pillar, striking a pose.

"I'm not sure I understood all that, but I know an evil plan when I hear one!  Prepare to face my submarine!"

The Masked Bishop staggered backward in shock.  "Guh-Grand Papillion?!! Im- impossible!  An idiot like you couldn't possibly have found our plan!"

"And you're quite right.  I couldn't have done it without one other."

A polite cough echoed from above, drawing attention to the mighty Mystere standing valiantly atop one of the pillars, cape flapping in the breeze.

In the distance, the rising sounds of a battle theme intro could be heard.

* Justice always prevails!  Even if sometimes it must hide its face.
* Akashic Torment and a True Rune introduce even these two do-gooders to angst and pain.
* The Suikoden detectives close the case and reveal everyone's secret identity, humiliating them.
* After an epic battle exhausts all, the four are kidnapped from the hospital and forcibly impressed into Tantalus's act.

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #5 on: March 08, 2008, 03:30:35 AM »
It Had To Happen
~SnowFire


"Captain!  Off the port bow!"

Recently recruited lad Dart was yelling down from the crow's nest like crazy to Gilder on the <i>Claudia</i>.

Fina handed Aika the telescope, which she then put to her eye.  "It's...  the <i>Falcon</i>?  With that perverted prince of Eblan at its head...  almost as bad as Vigoro, him.  But the black-clad others...?"

"...Ninjas," Vyse stated with an air of finality.  "Battle stations."

Nets were already quietly descending, as the silent assassins came at their ancient enemy. The other pirates of the DL came out to prepare, weapons drawn...


* Edge, Shadow, Yuffie, Frank, an FFT ninja... what could possibly stop the DL Ninjas and their real ultimate power?
* The Sky Pirates ruthlessly pillage, rob, and humiliate these laughable excuses for roguery.
« Last Edit: March 08, 2008, 03:42:29 AM by Taishyr »

superaielman

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2008, 05:14:14 AM »

The title of knight if certainly one to be proud of. Wether you use it for good or bad, it matters not, for in the Duelling League, prowess, technique and the ability to battle is what really counts. So, while we're on the subject, what say we put two different units of knights and see which fairs better? Just to make them want to rip eachother's throats even more so, we're going to pit the four of the most righteous knights in the league against four of the most notorious ones.

To the side of good, we have the proud knights of the Zexen Republic. That's right, these four have served under the great general that is Chris Lightfellow. Please allow me to introduce to you Borus, Percival, Leo and Roland! Now here's a team that's got the whole package. Borus and Leo are there for the physical damage, while Pecival and Roland are in back using magic and sniping, respectivally. No evil knights can match these four... right?

---

To the side of bad, we have the evil that is the Temple Knight, representing the Church of St-Ajora. Although certainly not as humble and respectful as their Zexen counterparts, these guys are certainly ready for some serious ass-kicking. Let me introduce to you Vormav, Wiegraf, Rofel and Balk! Despite a lack in magic, these guys have got more than enough to take down those Zexen scumbags. With the physical strength these four offer, I doubt any righteous knight will be taking them down anytime soon.


So, who will reign surpreme this time? The side of good, or that of bad?

- Zexen Knights (Borus, Percival, Leo, Roland)
- Temple Knights (Vormav, Wiegraf, Rofel, Balk)
_________________

-Someone edit this.
"Reputation is what other people know about you. Honor is what you know about yourself"- Count Aral Vorkosigan, A Civil Campaign
-------------------
<Meeple> knownig Square-enix, they'll just give us a 2nd Kain
<Ciato> he would be so kawaii as a chibi...

Shale

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2008, 05:37:55 AM »
The title of "Knight" is certainly one to be proud of. Whether you use it for good or bad matters not, for in the Duelling League, prowess, technique and the ability to battle is what really counts. So, while we're on the subject, what say we put two different units of knights and see which fares better? Just to make them want to rip each other's throats even more so, we're going to pit the four of the most righteous knights in the league against four of the most notoriously underhanded.

On the side of good, we have the proud knights of the Zexen Republic. That's right, these four have served under the great general that is Chris Lightfellow. Please allow me to introduce to you Borus, Percival, Leo and Roland! Now here's a team that's got the whole package. Borus and Leo are there for the physical damage, while Percival and Roland are in back using magic and sniping, respectively. No evil knights can match these four...right?

---

On the side of bad, we have the evil that is the Temple Knight, representing the Church of St. Ajora. Although certainly not as humble and respectful as their Zexen counterparts, these guys are certainly ready for some serious ass-kicking. Let me introduce to you Vormav, Wiegraf, Rofel and Balk! They might lack magic, but these guys have got more than enough to take down those Zexen scumbags. With the physical strength these four offer, any do-gooder will have a hard time taking them done.


So, who will reign supreme this time? The side of good, or that of bad?

- Zexen Knights (Borus, Percival, Leo, Roland)
- Temple Knights (Vormav, Wiegraf, Rofel, Balk)
"Sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology."
-Ponder Stibbons

[23:02] <Veryslightlymad> CK dreams about me starring in porno?
[23:02] <CmdrKing> Pretty sure.

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #8 on: March 22, 2008, 04:35:48 AM »
Don't Quit Your Day Job 4: Bet You Didn't See this Coming!
~By Meeplelard

After witnessing several humiliations in fighting, Seifer had but one thing left to do.  He didn't like doing it, but it was really his only option left.

He decided to go back to being a professional advisor.  Yes, his advice wasn't exactly the greatest, but considering he still helped Meflice find his true calling in cooking, and was indirectly the result of "Dragon Warrior: The Legendary Story" theatrical production that was number one in the box office for months, its hard to say he doesn't have SOME success at it. Much to his irritation.

After reaching his office and being greeted by his secretary Shiho ("Aah, Seifer, glad to see you finally gave up on getting anything more out of life! The pity cookies are on the desk." "Can it."), he decided it was best to go back to business!

Looking at his paper of appointments for the day...

"Shiho, how did everyone know I was going to be back today?"

"Betting pools. Zell Dincht won it. Blame him for being so sure, he encouraged everyone to apply for today."

"How in hell would he have known? Remind me to thrash Chickenwuss once I get done today."

"Sure, boss. You going with the submissive gear today or going to try for something a bit more up- OW! What was that?"

"Your pity cookies."

With that, he leaned back. And waited. And waited and waited and got irritated and waited and-

"Damn it! Where the hell is he? Shiho! Where's the first potential?"

"I sent him in already." Shiho replied.

"Well, I don't see him!" Seifer exclaimed.  Before he could say something else...

"I'm right here!" the voice of a small child exclaimed.  Seifer looked over his desk, and saw what looked like a little cloud with a face, arms, and wearing some shorts.  The first thing that came to Seifer's mind...after various other things...was "oh boy, a freak; seems things are back to normal."

"Alright, take a seat..." Seifer said, shuffling through his papers looking for the name. "Mallow, of Nimbus Land, is it?"

"That's me, alright!"

"Aren't you a little...young to start working?"

"Well, my mom and dad said that if I am to grow up to be king, I need to get some early experience in the professional world. And according to our sources in Nimbus Land, we learned you're the best person to come to!"

"...why do I have the feeling that's just your way of saying 'you're the only person who does this stuff and I didn't really have a choice in the manner,'?"  Seifer replied snidely before glancing over Mallow's resume. "Well... seems you're still young, your small size won't be very helpful for manual labor, and you have no experience in, like...anything, world saving aside..."

"Why are you being so mean?" Mallow questioned, a lip trembling.

"Hey, i'ts not my fault you're just a little squirt."

"I...*sniff*" Mallow at this point started crying.  The result caused it to rain...inside of Seifer's office.

"WHO THE HELL TURNED ON THE SPRINKLERS?" "Wasn't me this time, Boss!"

"I...*sniff* sorry, but when I cry, it starts raining." Mallow at this pointed had calmed down.

"So you can control weather is what you're saying?"

"Somewhat, yes..."

"...well, that opens up one job offer here!" Seifer slid a wet piece of paper over to Mallow. "You can be a meteorologist."

"A...what?"

"Says here you can predict weather for people. Now, you can take it, or I can start making fun of you again." Seifer said, forgetting for a moment the ankle-high water in his office.

"A Weather Man, you say? I'll take it!" Mallow said, grabbing the paperwork and running out the door.

"Well, things are back to the way they use to be... whatever that means.  Anyway, bring the next one in!" Seifer exclaimed.

In walked a young brown haired girl, holding what looked like a staff, wearing pink. Admittedly, this helps not at all in recognizing her, so we'll just flat out tell you that it's Sophia Esteed.

"So, I hear you have a job lined up for me?" she said, smiling vapidly. Seifer snorted and pulled out another document, shaking water off the plastic covering. .

"Uh, yeah, something like that. So, you've been in Outer Space according to this?"

"I have! Why does that matter?"

"Do you have any experience piloting space crafts, then?"

"None whatsoever!"

"...god damn it, well, THAT idea is out the window.  So...as much as it pains me to ask this, what the hell do you like to do?"

"Oh, well, I like polishing my nails, walks in the mall, shopping, talking on the phone for hours about absolutely nothing, cooking meals like super hot ice cream and edible tire paste, feeding random chipmunks, dancing at clubs, getting... Seifer, sir, why are you hitting yourself in the head?"

"Ah, it's nothi-"

"And I also like pretty ponies and frilly dresses and..."

It was near the end when she said "Trying on clothes" somewhere in all that rambling that an idea sparked in Seifer to shut her up.

"Fashion Designer it is." Seifer said, grabbing another sheet and signing the forms.

"And destroying corrupt souls with the power of the Mo-...wait, what was that?"

"Let me rephrase that. You're going to be a fashion designer, whether you like it or not, there's no other options, shut up get out of my damn office good -day-."

Sophia was speechless.  It is unknown as to whether it was out of excitement or just plain awe at Seifer being...well, Seifer.  Either way, she didn't really have much of a choice but to accept the paper work and walk out of the room.

"In fairness, Seifer, you did ask a teenage school girl what she liked to do; did you really expect anything less?" Shiho said seemingly chuckling at Seifer's pain at the same time. "Why, when I was young..."

"Yeah, yeah, just send in the next person."

"Um, yeah, about him...well, he got a bit out of hand, so I had to deal with him in...unique methods."

"Don't tell me you..."

"Oh, no! I just merely mean I had security detain him in the closest object possible...which is to say, he got stuffed in a barrel. and kicked out of here."

"Uh-huh...does this exempt me from doing his paper work, then?" Seifer asked in a wistful tone.

"No."

"Goddamn it! So what did he do exactly that made him get kicked out like that?"

"Tried to gamble with the two previous appointments, and generally annoying them at the same time...and actually brought his weapon with him as well."

"Gambling you say?  Well, let's sentence him to doing nothing but that, then! Professional gambler... Ronfar's Casino... okay, signed.  Shiho, make sure you send these forms to his house, and make it clear we won't accept no for an answer...what was his name again?"

"Alonso, and it doesn't matter that he's apparently good with ships, does it?"

"Nope! Not at all!  Just send in the last appointment, so we can get this day over with."  Seifer said, seemingly tired.

"Aha!  But you fail to realize that, due to God's power, I am already here!" shouted the voice of an old man.

"...what the hell? Yes, I know you're in this building; if you weren't, you'd be late for the appointment." said Seifer.

"Don't mind him, Seifer; this guy likes to ramble about his 'God' and all that.  Just suck it up." Shiho said.

Seifer sighed, and motioned for him to come in.  Entered was a bald priest with white facial hair, wearing a purple robe.

"So...your name is Habaruku, is it...and you can transform into some weird octopus thing?" Seifer asked with a slight scowl, looking at the resume.

"This is all the will of our God! Give yourself to the power of St. Eva and you will be saved!"

"I'm far beyond saving at this point, so not even going to try.  And besides, didn't that religion die out a while ago?"

"Well, most of our churches did suffer from Kaiser Dragon related terrorist acts...and then we were (rightfully) accused of being the cause of most of the demons in our world, thus scaring off most of our followers.  Oh, and my God decided to get a new disciple in some guy who calls himself the Space Pope. Other than that, no, we're still going strong!"

"...that was a simple yes or no answer, damn it!  I didn't ask for your ROMANTIC (if you can call it that) life story."

"But there is far more to be gained by the power of God, young one, why don't you consider it?"

"Well, I have been considering one thing..." Seifer said, seemingly thinking for once in his life.

"And what might that be, heathen?"

"Well, you're good at religious propaganda, it seems, to make a clearly evil being seem so popular, would you say?"

"THE GOD OF ST. EVA IS ABSOLUTE! DO NOT MOCK HIM!"

"...yeah, this job is perfect.  Listen up, what you're going to do is going to take this form, go to Nanjo Studios, and do what you always did, except on live public broadcasts."

"Are you saying the word of God isn't good enough for cable, even basic?" The priest seemed affronted.

"That's exactly what I'm saying!  Now, you can take it, or I can make arrangements to have some draconic security deal with you." Seifer grinned a bit.

"... ah... Your offer intrigues me!  My God is happy to oblige!  I will take you up on this and become the greatest priest on television!"

"Yeah, yeah, good." Seifer handed the documents over. "Now just get out of my office already, damn it!"

Seifer let out one last sigh, having finally finished a days work...for all that he didn't really do much but argue with a few people.  So the question is, as it always shall be...

WHO IS THE MOST SUCCESSFUL IN THEIR JOBS?

-Predicting weather is easy when you control it. Mallow is a success!
-Sophia knows popularity, so her designs naturally win the day.
-Alonso finally succeeds at gambling since he has nothing to lose!
-Televangelists are the ultimate scammers. Habaruku's in his element.
-They all fail miserably. A long vacation has not been good for Seifer.

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #9 on: April 05, 2008, 03:50:15 AM »
Hope for the Hopeless
~Meeplelard

"What do you mean we've been forced into another stalemate?" the lord of Norgard said in a high-pitched, nasal voice.

"Its just as I said.  Your tactic of sending hordes of Ghouls, Giant Scorpions and Mermen, along with just Ector, Elaine and Faticia as your only knights to take down the enemy's front lines ended in failure. Our losses were minimum, granted, hence why it's a stalemate..." replied a red haired Cyborg.

"How could this be? We had strength in numbers! Damn those Kooluk bastards and they're preference of chocolate over strawberry ice cream!  They'll pay for that blasphemous thoughts!" Vaynard screamed. "DURAN! What do you think?"

"Well, my fairy strategist has told us that we should stop attacking their Rune Cannons head on, and instead battle it in long range combat! I mean,  they're just cannons, clearly  their fortress is not suited for ranged combat as we are!" replied the mercenary from Forcena.

"Sir, not that I question your brilliance in planning, but if I may ask my lord, how many attempts have we tried at taking out the Kooluk?" said Guinglain to Vaynard.

"This would be only the second attempt." replied Vaynard.

"Actually, according to Wren's data, this is the seventh attempt in the past two weeks...heck, we've tried three times in the past four days, even." replied Mieu.

"Well, don't you think that this battle might be a bit out of our reach for now?  I think it would be best we hold off and try to study our opponent a bit, and discover a potential weakness." Guinglain stated.

"Bah! The White Wolf of Norgard needs no time to take advantage of such useless details like weaknesses!  As is predicted by the stars, we will take over the Kooluk and their master Graham Cray will kneel before me as I mock his ever pathetic black eyes!"

"Oh, yes, long live Vaynard! You have my support til the end!" Duran shouted.

"Yes! Ok, our new strategy will be to use Pixies!  Yes, with all those spells they can cast, the enemy army will be running amok as we trounce them!  Any objections to this strategy?"

"Um, sir, if you don't mind, I believe we ran out of Pixies in the strategy where we used them as catapult ammunition." stated Mieu yet again.

"Alright...so lets MEET THEM HEAD ON THEN!  All forces, move out! We will start tommorrow!"

The strategy session was closed at this point, as Vaynard's brilliant planning of taking out the Kooluks with his newly built up Norgard Defense Force was about to commence.

So the next day had arrived, and after about two hours of fighting...

"What do you MEAN we still haven't won?  How can those fools last so long?" Vaynard shouted.

"Well, in fairness, wars aren't usually won in a day, sir." replied one of the knights Vaynard had hired.

"GET OUT OF MY ARMY FOR SPEAKING SUCH NONSENSE, NOW!" Vaynard screamed.

The fight wasn't really going anywhere, though.  Vaynard's forces clashed with Cray's, and neither could really make much of any progress.  At some point in the fight, over what seemed like a loudspeaker coming from a balcony in the tower...

"Ahahahahaha! Foolish Norgard!  Do you really think you can stand before my mighty power?  Now you can give up and run away, or I'll be forced to use the Rune of Punishment on you!" Cray called.

Scene shifted to Graham Cray standing on that balcony, with a few of his advisors.

"Um, sir, I hate remind you that you don't HAVE the Rune of Punishment."

"I know that! But I'm sure they don't.  We aren't going to need it anyway.  Have you EVER heard of a victory in the favor of the Norgard Defense Force?  This fight has been won by my tactical genius and strategic location before it was even started!" Cray stated, followed by a sinister laugh.

Back to the actual battle...

"You think you can scare me with your blithering nonsense? The White Wolf fears nothing!  Norgard, show them the true power that was given to us by the heavens!  We will take down all that oppose us!"  Vaynard exclaimed.

At this moment, with a flash of light and a pillar of...more light, an odd figure appeared in front of the Norgard Defense Force, facing the enemy.  Clad in black armor, draped in a large crimson cape, wielding a magnificently large sword, he stood there unmoved by the oncoming army's next charge.  Moments later, he raised his sword and in one slash, the entire front lines of Kooluk had been blasted away.

"What just happened? Where did a warrior like that come from?" Graham Cray exclaimed, looking in a telescope that was definitely NOT there a moment ago.

"Forces of Kooluk, who abuse the power of rune for your own destructive purposes, you will give up now unless you wish to face me. For I am the Black Knight." stated this new figure, calmly.

"Damn it, didn't expect them to actually be smart enough to call in the support of someone like him.  Forces, pull back! We need to rethink our strategy!" Cray shouted over the loudspeaker to the rest of his army.  At this point, the Kooluk army withdrew.

The knight turned towards Vaynard and followed up by saying "Do you wish for some assistance in taking down the enemy?"

"The Black...what a generic name.  Bah! Why should I trust you? And how do I know you're worthy of being a part of Norgard Defense Force!"

"I can simply note that I just took down a whole battalion of soldiers in a single strike..." the Black Knight responded "and then there's the fact that I am nearly invincible in combat."

"Ha! You? Invincible? I'll be the one to judge that. Duran! Take him out!"  Vaynard shouted.

"Yes sir, my lord!" Duran shouted, appearing seemingly out of nowhere. "Ha! I defeated the Black Shine Knight...with the help of 8 Mana Spirits and several allies...you'll be no different! I mean, you don't even have the word Shine in your name!"

"I see.  So you are to be my opponent? Very well, I will accept your challenge, but I can't guarantee your life." The Black Knight responded, unmoved.

"HA! You couldn't take it even if you tried!" Duran responded.

(In fairness to Duran, he is correct in one sense.  Duran has a way of defying death based on pure hot headed stubbornness, which turns death into nothing more than a temporary set back with some amnesia involved.)

Duran charged at the Black Knight, slashing at him, and each hit doing nothing more than a tink sound.

"Your skills are admirable, but your mind is elsewhere.  If you could get your act together, you could have a strong warrior." the Black Knight said as Duran was slashing at him. "But... I think this little charade has gone on enough" and with that, the Black Knight withdrew Alondite, and with one slash, Duran was knocked about 50 feet back, and back bent in such a way that people didn't think was possible, though, that was probably because Duran happened to fall directly perpendicular to a large vertical rock, and not cause of the Black Knight's attack directly.  "Does this vouch for my own strength?"

"You've just defeated one of my stronger warriors and higher ups in Duran... I see, perhaps you are much stronger than I gave you credit for.  Maybe there is room for you on the NDF! I see, well then, we shall discuss what course of action we will take now with our new ally! Victory will soon be ours!" Vaynard shouted.

So with that, in an unexpected turn of events, the "legendary" NDF gained support of the greatest of the 4 Riders of Daien, the Black Knight.  But can his might alone be enough to overthrow Graham Cray?  Or is this fight truly one that is that far out of Vaynard's reach?

-With their new ally, the NDF gets their first victory...ever.
-Not even the Black Knight can make up for all the NDF's failings.

Jo'ou Ranbu

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #10 on: April 05, 2008, 04:57:16 AM »
Hope for the Hopeless
~Meeplelard

"What do you mean by 'we've been forced into another stalemate'?", the lord of Norgard squealed.

"It's just as I said. Your so-called tactics involving hordes of Ghouls, Giant Scorpions and Mermen, along with just Ector, Elaine and Faticia as your HIGHLY COMPETENT KNIGHTS to take down the enemy's front lines? Failed miserably. Our losses were minimal, granted. Thus the stalemate," coldly replied a red-haired Cyborg, shrugging as he finished the sentence.

Vaynard grunted, and looked up. Infuriated, he let out a howling scream. "How could this be? We had the numbers! We had the strategy! We had it all! God DAMN those Kooluk bastards and their menial preference of chocolate over strawberry ice cream! They will pay for their utterly blasphemous thoughts!" The leader of Norgard, however, managed to regain his posture long enough to recoup and reorganize his plans. Vaynard coughed and looked back, as if he knew who to call.

"DURAN! What do you think of the recent developments?"

"Um... uhhh... well, my fairy strategist told us that we should stop attacking their Rune Cannons head on, en... engin... engaging them in long range combat instead! I mean, those're just cannons, right? Their fortress shouldn't be suited for ranged combat as well as we are!", the Forsena mercenary bubblishly replied. He seemed to not be paying much attention...

Guinglain, one of Vaynard's most trusted knights, shaked his head in disapproval. He tapped his chin ominously. "Sir... please do not think that I question your tactical excellence. But, m'lord, if I may be so daring... do you remember exactly how many offensives have we put against the Kooluk?"

"This would be only the second attempt," smirked the proud White Wolf.

At that, a generically scantily clad cyborg girl chimed in. "Incorrect. According to Wren's most recent database collections, this is the seventh attempt in the past two weeks. In fact, we have tried three times in the past four days, which is impressive in a rather negative light."

Guinglain nodded bitterly, reclining over his chair as he searched for the words to reply. "I see. M'lord, don't you think that Kooluk might be more than our forces can handle as of now? Instead of charging head on, a detailed study of our current enemy in search for weakspots and tactical openings should be more productive - not to mention less taxing to our reserves."

"Bah! The White Wolf of Norgard has no need for such useless details! I have the raw strength to win! As told by the stars, we will take over the Kooluk and their master Graham Cray will kneel before me as I mock his ever pathetic black eyes!", Vaynard flamboyantly replied. At this point, one might say he was well past delusional.

"YES! Long live Vaynard! You have my support til the end," Duran shouted. Well, at least Vaynard wasn't alone. Although the company could be less questionable.

"Yes indeed," Vaynard said with a smile, quickly moving to a more urgent matter. "Okay. Our new strategy will involve a Pixie rush! YES! With their huge spellset, they will wreak havoc among the enemy army! They will run amok as we trounce them! So! Any objections to this strategy?"

"Sir, according to my high-precision calculations, I believe we ran out of Pixies in the strategy where we used them as catapult ammunition," Mieu blankly stated.

Vaynard twitched, but the annoyance was quickly replaced by a confident aura. "Aaaaaall right... so! Let us MEET THEM HEAD ON, THEN! All forces, move out! We will start tomorrow!"

The strategy session was closed at this point, as Vaynard's "brilliant plans" to take out the Kooluks with his newly built-up Norgard Defense Force were about to commence. The entire army had issues sleeping that night, as Guinglain's fierce headdesking echoed through the castle.

So, the next day had arrived, and about two hours of fighting had passed in the battlefield...

"What do you MEAN we still haven't won? How can those fools withstand our attacks?", Vaynard shouted in exhasperation.

"Well, in fairness, wars aren't usually won in a day, sir," replied one of the knights Vaynard had hired, in a glimpse of common sense.

"GET OUT OF MY ARMY FOR SPEAKING SUCH NONSENSE, NOW!", the White Wolf screamed.

The fight wasn't really going anywhere, though. Vaynard's forces clashed with Cray's relentlessly, and neither could really make much progress at all. And, at some point in the fight, over what seemed like a loudspeaker coming from a balcony in the tower...

"Ahahahahaha! Foolish Norgard! Do you really think you can stand before my mighty power?  I will graciously give you one last chance to run away! Decline and I'll be happy to present the Rune of Punishment to you!"

It was Cray's booming voice, clearly mocking the relentless White Wolf. This could not be left unattended.

The scene quickly shifted to Graham Cray standing on that balcony, with a few of his advisors.

"Um, sir, I hate to remind you... but you don't HAVE the Rune of Punishment."

"I know that! But I'm sure they don't, and ignorance will win us the war. We aren't going to need it regardless, considering our foes. Have you EVER heard of a victory in the favor of the Norgard Defense Force? This fight has been won by my tactical genius and strategic location before it was even started," Cray calmly stated, followed by a muffled, yet sinister laugh.

Now, back to the actual battle.

"You think you can scare me with your blithering nonsense? The White Wolf fears nothing!  Norgard, show them the true power that was given to us by the heavens! We will take down all that oppose us!", Vaynard romantically exclaimed. Some of the troops let out an exhasperated sigh, some others ironically let out a sarcastic hurrah. As for Guinglain, he brought the desk to the battlefield in order to bash his head properly.

At this moment, with a blinding flash of light and a gigantic pillar of... more generic light, an odd, imposing figure appeared in front of the Norgard Defense Force, facing the enemy. Clad in armor black as the night, draped in a large, fluttering crimson cape, wielding a magnificently large sword, he stood there, unmoved by the incoming army's next charge. Moments later, he raised his sword and, in one swift slash, the entire front lines of Kooluk were decimated. A miracle occurred.

"What just happened? Where did a warrior like that come from?", exclaimed a far less confident Graham Cray, looking at the battlefield's situation with a conveniently present telescope - one that didn't exist in the room until about now.

"Forces of Kooluk, who abuse the power of rune for your own destructive purposes, you will give up now unless you wish to face me. For I am the Black Knight," the mysterious figured stated serenely.

"Damn it, didn't expect them to actually be smart enough to call in the support of someone like him. Forces, pull back! We need to rethink our strategy!", Cray shouted over the loudspeaker to the rest of his army. At this point, the Kooluk army withdrew.

The knight turned towards Vaynard. He smirked under his helmet, and signaled to the White Wolf. "Do you wish for some assistance in taking down the enemy?"

"The Black...what a generic name. Bah! Why should I trust you? And how do I know you're worthy of being a part of Norgard Defense Force?"

"I can simply note that I just took down a whole battalion of soldiers in a single strike," the Black Knight responded. He quickly followed up. "... and then, there's the fact that I am nearly invincible in combat, as you may have seen."

Vaynard snorted. "Ha! You? Invincible? I'll be the one to judge that. Duran! Take him out!"

"Yes sir, my lord!", Duran shouted, appearing seemingly out of nowhere. "Ha! I defeated the Black Shine Knight... with the help of 8 Mana Spirits and several allies... but whatever! You'll be no different! I mean, you don't even have the word Shine in your name!"

"I see. So... you are to be my opponent? Very well, I will accept your challenge, but I can't guarantee your life," The Black Knight responded, unmoved.

The mercenary grunted, gripping his blade intently. "HA! You couldn't take it even if you tried!"

(In fairness to Duran, he is correct in one sense. Duran has a way of defying death based on pure hot-headed stubbornness - which more normal people just call 'idiocy' - which, strangely, turns death into nothing more than a temporary setback with some amnesia involved. Sometimes, the setback also includes wholesome crossdressing, but let's not get into that.)

Duran charged at the Black Knight, slashing at him, and each hit doing nothing more than a tink sound.

"Your skills are admirable, but your mind is elsewhere. If you could get your act together, you could have a strong warrior," the Black Knight said as Duran was slashing at him. "But... I think this little charade has gone on enough!"

As the Black Knight's lips shut, he withdrew the mighty Alondite, and with one slash, Duran was knocked about 50 feet back, back bent in such a way that people didn't think was possible. That might've been the result of Duran conveniently falling perpendicularly to a large vertical rock, and not because of the Black Knight's attack directly. 

The Black Knight himself sighed and turned to Vaynard, sheathing back Alondite. "Do you believe this is enough of a vow for my own strength?"

"You've just defeated one of my stronger warriors and higher-ups in Duran... damn," Vaynard muttered. "I see. Perhaps you are much stronger than I gave you credit for. Maybe there is room for you on the mighty Norgard Defense Force! I see, well then, we shall discuss what course of action we will take now with our new ally! Victory will soon be ours!", Vaynard shouted to his exhausted and perplexed troops.

So, with that, in an unexpected turn of events, the "legendary" NDF gained support of the greatest of the 4 Riders of Daien, the Black Knight. But can his might alone be enough to overthrow Graham Cray? Or is this fight truly one that is that far out of Vaynard's reach?

- With their new ally, the NDF gets their first victory...ever. I'm as shocked as you are.
- Not even the Black Knight can make up for all the NDF's shortcomings. I mean, Fairy as an strategist? Failure is truly the only option.
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> HEY
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> LAGGY
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> UVIET?!??!?!
[01:08] <Laggy> YA!!!!!!!!!1111111111
[01:08] <Soppy-ReturningToInaba> OMG!!!!
[01:08] <Chulianne> No wonder you're small.
[01:08] <TranceHime> cocks
[01:08] <Laggy> .....

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #11 on: April 12, 2008, 04:21:54 AM »
Chin-Off
Lance


Nothing personifies a man's worth like a good, strong chin. The manliest men in history have all possessed firm, square, well-toned chins that looked as though they were chiseled out of solid granite. A man can get pretty far in life with nothing more than a good attitude and a strong chin. If you don’t believe me, simply take a look at the two men in the DL with the largest, most impressive jaw lines.

Masaji Kato's chin is legendary. One look at his burly mandible and you know that this is not the kind of man you want to mess with. Kato was responsible for throwing the world in turmoil and nearly rewriting history itself, thanks in no small part to the power that his chin commanded. He would have succeeded in his goals if he didn't have to contend with the sheer awesomeness of Yuri Hyuga; any lesser hero would have surely succumbed to Kato's chin of doom. If Chuck Norris were to punch Kato in the chin, Chuck Norris would break his hand.

And then, of course, there’s the mighty and multi-talented Big Joe. He is a former 3-time WWWF champion, an award-winning actor, a prime-time basketball star, a Wimbledon champion, and a recipient of the Pulitzer Prize. Plus, his chin is massive. Coincidence? I think not. It is a scientific fact that the size of one's chin is directly proportional to one's level of success in life, and Big Joe clearly corroborates this data. Take a good look at Big Joe's epic jaw line if you don’t believe me. I even heard that Big Joe once killed a man with his chin. That thing is deadly, I tell you.

However, there is only enough room for one massive chin in the Dueling League! Who has the bigger, manlier chin? Join us now as Masaji Kato and Big Joe engage in the DL's very first (and probably very last) Chin-Off!



Choices:
- Masaji Kato clearly has the better chin
- Big Joe's chin reigns supreme 

Shale

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #12 on: April 26, 2008, 04:16:51 AM »
<i>Spyduck: From Hoenn with Love from Dr. Mime's Octillery Who Loved Me With A Lunatoneraker :Dialgas Are Forever: Arbok Eater.</i>

A subtle quack.

The guard, a Weezing, whirls in place, trying to catch the noise.

The grate above him opens, and Spyduck, International Psyduck Of Mystery, holds a gun on him from above.

Then tackles him from above, because the dumb Weezing hadn't noticed yet.

Join the adventures of Spyduck, his sidekick Dittocon and his love interest Persian Galore, as he travels through the darkest jungles (While making out with his love interest), infiltrates dark and dank and suspiciously well-lit installations (While making out with his love interest), battles the evil Dr. Mime, and has thrilling cliffhanger torture scenes (While making out with his love interest).

(Note, all instances of love interest interaction may or may not actually exist.)

You will witness old staples, such as Spyduck driving a Lamborghini at high speeds over twisted mountain roads simply because it looks awesome doing it, Spyduck pulling out a portable laser cannon to open doors, Spyduck pulling out a portable laser cannon to sever his bonds, Spyduck pulling out a portable laser cannon to reheat his coffee, and Spyduck snapping the necks of Hitmonlee guards using only the power of its mind while they wonder what that noise was.

You will thrill as Dr. Mime, stroking his Purugly, holds the world hostage with his Dialga-powered Lunar Metal Gear mounted Time-Compression Cannon, for one trillion Pokedollars, an entirely impossible request since no one can hold that many! Will Spyduck manage to save the day and get the girl!? Will Spyduck have his head shaken or stirred!? Will there be Mudkips and hot Skitty on Wailord action!? Only time will tell!

(Except that last part. The answer is definitely no there.)

-Spyduck captures Dr. Mime and saves the day.
-Spyduck makes Dr. Mime faint and loses his chance at camo, but still saves the day.
-Spyduck saves the day, but Dr. Mime gets away.
-Dr. Mime is piloting Blissohod. He's not losing this century. He'll lose, just not this century.
"Sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology."
-Ponder Stibbons

[23:02] <Veryslightlymad> CK dreams about me starring in porno?
[23:02] <CmdrKing> Pretty sure.

SnowFire

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #13 on: May 17, 2008, 02:34:29 AM »
Lucretia Merces was poring over Falena's finances, and things didn't look good.  The civil war had been expensive.  She'd intended to simply go off wandering again in proper Suikoden style, but passage across the sea was expensive, and there were certain lifestyle concerns...  hmph.  Seems like she'd have to put the shop in order before leaving.

A stack of mail brought from distant lands lay on her desk.  Hopefully there'd be something that could earn some money this time.  "ABANDONED SUM OF TWENTY MILLION POTCH IN BANK ACCOUNT", from a Zidane Tribal.  Uh, no.  "Earn honor and amazing prizes!"  It was from that Dueling League place again that kept stealing fighters.  Maybe she'd forward it to Shoon.  Lucretia was about ready to toss the rest in the trash, when she noticed a letter lying towards the bottom from "Spirans for the Eternal Godlike Champion."  ....was the amount of money offered in it a joke?

---

The airship's hall was set up for a banquet that never came.  It clearly was once luxurious, but the banners saying "CONGRATULATIONS DOUBLE GODLIKE CHAMPION" and "BEST SUMMONER EVER" had been pulled down, apparenly unneeded.  The tables lay about at crazy angles.

In the office, the employer stood drumming her fingers impatiently, flanked by two scantily clad women, and seemingly...  talking to herself?  "Oh, I'll show them.  They'll pay for their crimes.  They'll see how the true summoner is-"  Lucretia also noticed portraits of what looked like Lady and Myria, except with more knife marks defacing the portrait.  Noticing her arrival, the employer stopped rambling suddenly. 

"We're all here, then."  Lucretia noticed the open seat for herself, and the two other people seated - a black haired mage with a funny mark on his head, and some kind of scarred young mercenary type.  "You pretty much seem to be the brains of your respective establishments.  I'm hoping at least one of you will be up for a challenging contract I have."

"She's a bit obscure, but I'd like you to defeat the villain Marona.  I must first warn you that she has already defeated one legendary Hero.  My associate Walnut has more direct knowledge of the matter if you're unfamiliar with her."

The blond Chroma stepped forward.  "Ahem.  Marona is a villain who's already terrorized countless innocents and, incidentally, an uber-godlike rival.  Marona must be stopped before she can threaten me from ever losing agai- er, any one else.  Here's a picture of her:"

<img src="http://www.geocities.com/snowinferno/marona.jpg"> **EXCEPT CHANGE THIS TO THE RPGDL's OWN HOSTING**

Soren was unimpressed.  "You want us to use small armies to take out...  a thirteen year-old brat?"

"A thirteen-year old marauding demon-possessed brat, yes," Walnut continued.  "I see that you are not entirely familiar with how she works.  Very well, I'll tell you.  Through dark pacts with a blue-haired demon, she summons the souls of the dead that possess her into any suitable items nearby.  Doesn't matter how well you suprise her; her defense mechanisms will detect you, and she will 'go first' so to speak.  She can summon any number of her servants at will and not even use an action in doing so.  She has a variety of such phantoms at hand, as well; she will summon the forces most able to counter an attack you bring her.  Some of these have an initiative ability as well, just like she and her protector.  Brute force won't work here; you'll need a strategy."

Squall perked up at this.  "'Suitable items', you say?  Would it be possible to create a shortage of them and leave her with no army?"

"An excellent point.  Unfortunately, she's aware of this, and keeps a healthy supply of fifty or so seemingly random items littered about her dread Phantom Island fortress- including spare weapons if you break some."

Lucretia paused to consider this.  A single girl who could summon her own personal army?  Didn't this sound familiar?  She could have sworn that somebody else in the Dueling League did that too, and she wondered if they'd be jealous at someone else doing the same thing.

Walnut continued.  "She has perhaps one other weakness.  She doesn't seem to have full control over some of her creations- she has visited various islands with monsters that escaped from her control, and bloodily purged them.  Sometimes she'd even claim credit for solving the 'problems' she herself had loosed.  I wouldn't get your hopes up on that happening, though.  Any creatures she summons at her base will probably be loyal undead slaves."

The mysterious employer rose again.  "I will not lie.  This will be tough.  But someone has to do it.  There's no way we can allow such a clear threat to remain... though I would prefer if you didn't brag to everyone that you completed this yourself, mind.  Obviously, the organizer of victory, me, will deserve some credit too.  I'm certain ten million gil can buy shut lips as well as a defeated false-summoner."

* The warriors of Falena can handle this one; they know something about mass combat.
* Huge armies lead by insane villains?  Just work as usual for the Greil Mercenaries.
* SeeDs are supposed to be one-man armies, right?  Squall & co. can handle a little girl.
* The somewhat confused Dread Necromancer Marona-kins sweeps away all the invaders with her unstoppable army.
* Marona and the invading armies fight a bloody draw - before Walnut swoops in and defeats both, stealing the credit.

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #14 on: May 17, 2008, 03:49:02 AM »
Army of Darkness?
- SnowFire

Lucretia Merces was poring over Falena's finances, and things didn't look good.  The civil war had been expensive.  She'd intended to simply go off wandering again in proper Suikoden style, but passage across the sea was costly, and there were certain lifestyle concerns...  hmph.  Seems like she'd have to put the shop in order before leaving.

A stack of mail brought from distant lands lay on her desk.  Hopefully there'd be something that could earn some money this time.  "ABANDONED SUM OF TWENTY MILLION POTCH IN BANK ACCOUNT", from a Zidane Tribal.  Uh, no.  "Earn honor and amazing prizes!"  It was from that Dueling League place again that kept stealing fighters.  Maybe she'd forward it to Shoon.  Lucretia was about ready to toss the rest in the trash, when she noticed a letter lying towards the bottom from "Spirans for the Eternal Godlike Champion."  ....was the amount of money offered in it a joke?

---

The airship's hall was set up for a banquet that never came.  It clearly was once luxurious, but the banners saying "CONGRATULATIONS DOUBLE GODLIKE CHAMPION" and "BEST SUMMONER EVER" had been pulled down, apparently unneeded.  The tables lay about at crazy angles.

In the office, the employer stood drumming her fingers impatiently, flanked by two scantily clad women, and seemingly...  talking to herself?  "Oh, I'll show them.  They'll pay for their crimes.  They'll see how the true summoner is-"  Lucretia also noticed portraits of what looked like Lady and Myria, except with more knife marks defacing the portrait.  Noticing her arrival, the employer stopped rambling suddenly.

"We're all here, then."  Lucretia noticed the open seat for herself, and the two other people seated - a black haired mage with a funny mark on his head, and some kind of scarred young mercenary type.  "You pretty much seem to be the brains of your respective establishments.  I'm hoping at least one of you will be up for a challenging contract I have."

"She's a bit obscure, but I'd like you to defeat the villain Marona.  I must first warn you that she has already defeated one legendary Hero.  My associate Walnut has more direct knowledge of the matter if you're unfamiliar with her."

The blond Chroma stepped forward.  "Ahem.  Marona is a villain who's already terrorized countless innocents and, incidentally, an uber-godlike rival.  Marona must be stopped before she can threaten me from ever losing agai- er, anyone else.  Here's a picture of her:"

<img src="http://www.geocities.com/snowinferno/marona.jpg"> **REMEMBER TO CHANGE THIS, SUPER.**

Soren was unimpressed.  "You want us to use small armies to take out...  a thirteen year-old brat?"

"A thirteen-year old marauding demon-possessed brat, yes," Walnut continued.  "I see that you are not entirely familiar with how she works.  Very well, I'll tell you.  Through dark pacts with a blue-haired demon, she summons the souls of the dead that possess her into any suitable items nearby.  Doesn't matter how well you surprise her; her defense mechanisms will detect you, and she will 'go first' so to speak.  She can summon any number of her servants at will, not even pausing to rest in doing so.  She has a variety of such phantoms at hand, as well; she will summon the forces most able to counter an attack you bring her.  Some of these have an initiative ability as well, just like she and her protector.  Brute force won't work here; you'll need a strategy."

Squall perked up at this.  "'Suitable items', you say?  Would it be possible to create a shortage of them and leave her with no army?"

"An excellent point.  Unfortunately, she's aware of this, and keeps a healthy supply of fifty or so seemingly random items littered about her dread Phantom Island fortress- including spare weapons if you break some."

Lucretia paused to consider this.  A single girl who could summon her own personal army?  Didn't this sound familiar?  She could have sworn that somebody else in the Dueling League did that too, and she wondered if they'd be jealous at someone else doing the same thing.

Walnut continued.  "She has perhaps one other weakness.  She doesn't seem to have full control over some of her creations- she has visited various islands with monsters that escaped from her control, and bloodily purged them.  Sometimes she'd even claim credit for solving the 'problems' she herself had loosed. I wouldn't get your hopes up on that happening, though.  Any creatures she summons at her base will probably be loyal undead slaves."

The mysterious employer rose again.  "I will not lie.  This will be tough.  But someone has to do it.  There's no way we can allow such a clear threat to remain... though I would prefer if you didn't brag to everyone that you completed this yourself, mind.  Obviously, the organizer of victory, me, will deserve some credit too.  I'm certain ten million gil can buy shut lips as well as a defeated false-summoner."

* The warriors of Falena can handle this one; they know something about mass combat.
* Huge armies lead by insane villains?  Just work as usual for the Greil Mercenaries.
* SeeDs are supposed to be one-man armies, right?  Squall & co. can handle a little girl.
* The somewhat confused Dread Necromancer Marona-kins sweeps away all the invaders with her unstoppable army.
* Marona and the invading armies fight a bloody draw - before Walnut swoops in and defeats both, stealing the credit.
« Last Edit: May 17, 2008, 04:00:01 AM by Taishyr »

SnowFire

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #15 on: May 23, 2008, 05:31:32 AM »
Shadow May Cry
-Meeplelard

It was a dusky afternoon in Wales...much like is always the case there since time never seems to flow.  But that's an aside.  Coming down his spiral staircase as always was Roger Bacon himself, with Yuri sleeping and taking a nap on his couch, which apparently wasn't that uncommon since he wasn't at all surprised to see Yuri there.

"Yuri, wake up!" yelled the ghoul.  No response. "I said Wake Up darn it! I need your help with something!"  Still no response.  Sighing, Roger Bacon went over to what appeared to be the equivalent of an early 20th century stereo system.  Pressing a single button, loud music that can only be described as "Swing"... and unpopular Swing at that... echoed through the tiny house.  Needless to say, the Harmonixer jumped to his feet.

"Damn it old man!  What the hell are you trying to do? Make me deaf and/or Insane?" Yuri exclaimed.

"Well, at least I got your attention.  Now listen here, Yuri.  I have got some info on the whereabouts of an ancient object and I want you to investigate it for me!"

"...you don't sound very confident about it this time," Yuri responded.

"Well, the source I got it from was some jester figure who wouldn't stop making cracks at my appearance, so it may very well be a trap.  Of course, I'm at a loss for leads at the moment, which is exactly why I'm sending you."

"I see, I see.  You're too weak and old to do it yourself, so you're sending in me to look for it for you, and possibly kill anything that might get in your way, or try to stop your research of it, right?"  Yuri said, after yawning some.  "So, what the hell am I looking for exactly?"

"A fabled Crystal of Lightning!  People believed there to be only 4 Crystals, representing Fire, Water, Wind and Earth.  But apparently, there's a 5th, which may yet prove my hypothesis that the Suikoden Worlds and Final Fantasy Worlds are indeed connected!"  Roger Bacon exclaimed.

"Ok, no.  I'm calling bullshit on that one.  There's no way you came up with that theory until about 5 minutes ago."

"Whatever.  Either way, I need you to go looking into it for me! Besides, it's not like you have anything better to do at the moment!"

"Well..." Yuri paused, looking at his schedule, which consisted mostly of things like "Time with Alice", "Feed and/or Walk Blanca", "See Edge's next insane scheme, and watch it blow up in his face, and probably involve Piastol or Orlandu in some manner" "...I suppose I could fit it in sometime soon.  Guess I might as well get it over with sooner or later."

"Good boy Yuri!  I knew I could count on you!"

"Yeah, yeah.  I also know that if I said no, you'd find a way to force me into doing it anyway, so I figure I'd just avoid that altogether." Yuri walked out of the house, with a crudely-drawn map with directions to the (supposed) 5th Crystal of Amazingness.

-----

In a building with neon letters spelling out "Devil May Cry", a phone can be heard ringing...

"Devil May Cry.  No, I'm sorry, we just closed, try again tomorrow."  A red coated man with white hair was sitting in a chair with his feet relaxed on the table. "What's with these people always calling me after I'm closed? I should make my hours more public," he said spinning around in his chair, revealing himself to be none other than Dante.

Moments later, the doors of his joint busted open, with a not so friendly looking jester appearing. Dante sighed, knowing exactly what was about to transpire.

"Let me guess.  You have a special job for me, and it's not one that can wait."

"You're sharper than you look, Dante, son of Sparda."

"You can look my name up - congratulations, but that isn't exactly impressive.  What kind of job is this, anyway?"

"There's special object of which holds great power in the Tower of Syrcus 200 miles north of here.  I would like you to investigate it.  I believe unworthy others may be looking for it as well - take them down if they interfere.  Such a pity."

"And what's in it for me?"

"Do a good job, and I'll see to it that you're well rewarded.  You may even learn something new about your father."

"The usual excuse, huh?" Dante said, turning his head down as though he was thinking for a moment. "Fine, you got yourself a deal." Dante brought his head back up only to notice the odd clown had left.  "Huh, I see he at least had manners to not try and kill me before telling me of the mission.  Whatever, let's get this party started!" Dante backflipped off his desk and seamlessly jumped out of the door onto his ride.

-----

The Tower of Syrcus, a crystal tower that is said to lead directly to the Dark World.  As usual, it's filled with easily dispatched monsters.

"This...*huff*...tower...*puff*...is...*wheeze*...too...*pant* HIGH!" Yuri said, as he finally got off a large stair case in what looked like a large open room with many openings to the outside.  "God damn it Roger!  Why didn't you tell me this tower was so damn high! I wouldn't have passed up that free lunch on the way here, damn it!" Yuri shouted, pissed off.  "Well, this is as good a time as ever to take a breather.  Good thing the demons here are all pretty much wi-" Yuri's line was interrupted as he heard a gunshot and a bullet grazed his ear.

"I see...  so I wasn't alone on this search after all," stated the figure behind Yuri, holding a white revolver outstretched.

"You know, there are more proper ways of saying hi," Yuri stated as he turned around.  Dante stood behind him, not that he recognized him.  "You got some guts trying to kill me with nothing more than a pistol."

"So you think you're tough, eh?  Well try this on for size!" Dante said, seamlessly pulling Rebellion, his trademark sword, out of his back sheath and charging Yuri with it.  Yuri managed to parry away the Stinger hit with his hands, and threw a swift kick as Dante leaped back.

"You're pretty good, which is more than I can say about everything else in this tower." Yuri was amused to finally fight someone who could be deemed worthy.  Maybe.

"And here I thought this was going to be a hoax of a job," Dante replied.  "Well then, what's say we finish this charade!" Dante said, charging Yuri even faster this time, successfully slicing off Yuri's left arm.  "Now, I might let you live if you give up now," Dante said.

Yuri just sighed, picked up his left arm with his right, and reattached it like it was nothing. "God damn it! I hate when that happens."

Dante, having seen this kind of ridiculousness before, quickly came to his senses and responded "So you're not entirely human either, I see.  Never thought I'd meet someone actually capable in this tower!"

"Yeah, well, feeling's mutual!  You'll find I'm full of surprises!" Yuri exclaimed, charging Dante, shoving his claw through Dante's chest, then transforming into Death Emperor, his most basic fusion, and blasting him through one of the windows off the tower "and it'll teach you to never keep your guard down against the likes of me!" Yuri shouted as he watched Dante fall to his impending doom.

...or so Yuri thought, as moments later as Yuri was walking away from the scene, the sound of some vehicle could be heard approaching...fast.  Almost as though it was coming up the tower.  Yuri turned around to see nothing more than Dante come flying through the very same window he was knocked out of on a motorcycle, virtually unscathed by Yuri's attack.

"I'm...no, I've seen too much weird stuff in my day to even bother questioning how you just defied the laws of physics, much less found a motorcycle I know for a fact wasn't there... well, I guess you could have brought it... but then I'd just question why you didn't do that in the first place."

"It's part of the job."

"I see... well, obviously you've got some sort of connections to demons too... or maybe I'm just going delirious from all this climbing.  Either way, how about we stop this fooling around and get serious!" Yuri said, getting into his fighting position.

"Sounds good to me..." Dante said, squaring off in his own ready pose looking at Yuri.  "Let's rock!"

-----

Glaring into a crystal ball, Dhoulmagus could be seen watching the two "Demon Hunters" for lack of a better description go at it.

"Yes, this is perfect.  Now that the son of Ben Hyuga and Son of Sparda are going at it, the two will inevitably destroy themselves!  Such a pity.  This will prove interesting entertainment indeed, and ultimately result in the loss of two potential threats on my way... to supreme power!" he exclaimed, followed by his trademark evil laughter.

So the question remains: WHO WILL WIN?  Will Yuri and his plethora of fusions, skills with martial arts, and awesome brown trench coat emerge victorious? Or will Dante, with his unique ability to make even something as mundane as eating pizza look bad ass, come out ahead?

-Yuri teaches Dante a thing or two about Demon Fusion.
-Dante's got swords AND guns.  How can you stop that?
-The two fight an epic battle, but neither prevails, and are easy prey for Dhoulmagus's completely unexpected treachery.
-Somehow, the two agree to work together!  ...which then involves splitting the crystal in two unleashing a catastrophe, as usual.

Shale

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #16 on: May 24, 2008, 05:03:30 AM »
Shadow May Cry
-Meeplelard

It was a dusky afternoon in Wales. But then, it usually was. Time doesn’t seem to flow right there...But that's an aside.  Coming down his spiral staircase as usual was Roger Bacon himself, with Yuri napping on his couch, which apparently wasn't that uncommon either, since he wasn't at all surprised to see someone else in his home.

"Yuri, wake up!" yelled the ghoul.  No response. "I said wake up darn it! I need your help with something!"  Still no response.  Sighing, Roger Bacon went over to what appeared to be the equivalent of an early 20th century stereo system.  Pressing a single button, loud music that can only be described as swing…<I>bad</I> swing... echoed through the tiny house.  The Harmonixer jumped to his feet.

"Damn it old man!  What the hell are you trying to do? Make me deaf? Insane? Both?" Yuri exclaimed.

"Well, at least I got your attention.  Now listen here, Yuri.  I have got some info on the whereabouts of an ancient object and I want you to investigate it for me!"

"...you don't sound very confident about it this time," Yuri responded.

"Well, I got it from was some weird clown who wouldn't stop making cracks about my appearance, so it may very well be a trap.  Of course, I'm at a loss for leads at the moment, which is exactly why I'm sending you."

"I see, I see.  You're too weak and old to do it yourself, so you're sending in me to look for it for you, and possibly kill anything that might get in your way, or try to stop your research of it, right?"  Yuri said, after yawning some.  "So, what the hell am I looking for exactly?"

"A fabled Crystal of Lightning!  People believed there to be only four Crystals, representing Fire, Water, Wind and Earth.  But apparently, there's a fifth, which may yet prove my hypothesis that the Suikoden worlds and Final Fantasy worlds are indeed connected!"  Roger Bacon exclaimed.

"Ok, no.  I'm calling bullshit on that one.  There's no way you came up with that theory until about five minutes ago."

"Whatever.  Either way, I need you to go looking into it for me! Besides, it's not like you have anything better to do!"

"Well..." Yuri paused, looking at his schedule, which consisted mostly of things like "Time with Alice", "Feed and Walk Blanca", "See Edge's next insane scheme, and watch it blow up in his face, and probably involve Piastol or Orlandu somehow." "...I suppose I could fit it in sometime soon.  Guess I might as well get it over with."

"Good boy, Yuri!  I knew I could count on you!"

"Yeah, yeah.  I also know that if I said no, you'd find a way to force me into doing it anyway, so I figure I'd just avoid that altogether." Yuri walked out of the house, carrying a crudely-drawn map with directions to the (supposed) Fifth Crystal of Amazingness.

-----

In a building topped with neon letters spelling out "Devil May Cry", a phone rings…

"Devil May Cry.  No, sorry, we just closed. Try again tomorrow."  A red-coated man with white hair was sitting in a chair with his feet on the table. "What's with these people always calling me after closing time? I should put a sign up or something," Dante said, spinning around in his chair.

Moments later, the doors of his joint flew in with a crash, and an unfriendly-looking man in a jester suit walked in. Dante sighed. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been down <I>this</I> road before.

"Let me guess.  You have a special job for me, and it can’t wait."

"You're sharper than you look, Dante, son of Sparda."

"You looked my name up. Congratulations, but that isn't exactly impressive.  What kind of job is it?"

"There's special object of which holds great power in the Tower of Syrcus, 200 miles north of here.  I would like you to investigate it.  I believe others - <I>unworthy</I> others - may be looking for it as well. Such a pity. Take them down if they interfere."

"And what's in it for me?"

"Do a good job, and I'll see to it that you're well rewarded.  You may even learn something new about your father."

"The usual, huh?" Dante said, looking down for a moment. "Fine, you got yourself a deal." Dante brought his head back up only to notice that the odd clown had left.  "Well, at least he didn’t try to kill me before the lecture.  Whatever, let's get this party started!" Dante backflipped off his desk and seamlessly jumped out of the door onto his ride.

-----

The Tower of Syrcus, a crystal tower that is said to lead directly to the Dark World.  As usual, it's filled with easily-dispatched monsters.

"This...*huff*...tower...*puff*...is...*wheeze*...too...*pant* <B>HIGH</B>!" Yuri said…well, gasped…as he finally got to the top of a staircase that felt like it could have reached the observation deck of the Empire State Building. Of course, he wasn’t at the top yet. All he saw was more doors.

"God damn it, Roger!  Why didn't you tell me this tower was so damn high! I wouldn't have passed up that free lunch on the way here, damn it!" Yuri shouted.

"Well, this is as good a time as ever to take a breather.  Good thing the demons here are all pretty much wi-" Yuri's line was interrupted by a bullet, grazing his ear.

"So, he wasn’t lying about competition, then," said a man in a long coat, pointing a white handgun at Yuri’s head.

"That’s a nice way to say hello," Yuri said as he turned around.  Dante stood behind him, not they recognized each other.  "You’ve got some guts, trying to kill me with nothing more than a pistol."

"So you think you're tough, eh?  Well try this on for size!" Dante said, seamlessly pulling Rebellion, out of the sheath on his back as he rushed at Yuri. The Harmonixer turned away a Stinger with his claws, and threw a swift kick as Dante leapt back.

"You're pretty good. More than I can say for anything else in this tower." Yuri was amused to finally fight someone who might be worth the time. Maybe.

"And here I thought this was a wild goose chase," Dante replied.  "Well then, what d’ya say we finish this!" Dante charged even faster this time, and the slash struck home, cutting off Yuri’s left arm.

"Now, I might let you live if you give up now," Dante said.

Yuri just sighed, picked up his left arm with his right, and held it to the stump. The wound knitted in seconds. "God damn it! I hate when that happens."

Dante wasn’t exactly stunned by people the trick. "So you're not entirely human either?  Never thought I'd actually meet someone capable in this tower!"

"Yeah, well, it’s mutual!  You'll find I'm full of surprises!" Yuri charged forward, shoved a claw into Dante’s chest, and quickly Fused into Death Emperor. The blast of power and extra strength was enough to knock Yuri through a window. “Now you know not to let your guard down against the likes of me!" Yuri shouted as he watched Dante fall to his doom.

...or not. Moments late, Yuri heard the sound of a motor approaching. From <I>outside</I> the tower. And <I>fast</I>.  He turned around in time to see Dante come flying through the very same window he was knocked out, this time on a motorcycle and looking virtually unscathed by Yuri's attack.

"I'm...no, I've seen too much weird stuff in my day to even bother trying to figure any of this crap out. Including where you got the goddamn bike."

"It's part of the job."

"Fine. Whatever. Either you’ve got some demon in you or these stairs have driven me completely nuts.  Either way, how about we stop this fooling around and get serious!"

"Sounds good to me..." Dante said, squaring off in his own ready pose.  "Let's rock!"

-----

Glaring into a crystal ball, Dhoulmagus could be seen watching the two "demon hunters,” for lack of a less punny description, go at it.

"Yes, this is perfect.  The son of Ben Hyuga against the son of Sparda…they’re bound to destroy themselves! Such a pity. It will prove interesting entertainment indeed, and end with the deaths of two potential threats on my way... to supreme power!" he exclaimed, followed by his trademark evil laughter.

So the question remains: WHO WILL WIN?  Will Yuri and his plethora of fusions, martial arts skills, and awesome brown trench coat emerge victorious? Or will Dante, with his unique ability to make even something as mundane as eating pizza look badass, come out ahead?

-Yuri teaches Dante a thing or two about demon fusion.
-Dante's got swords AND guns.  How can you stop that?
-The two fight an epic battle, but only weaken each other, and are easy prey for Dhoulmagus's completely unexpected treachery.
-Somehow, the two agree to work together!  ...which then involves splitting the crystal in two and unleashing a catastrophe, as usual.
"Sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology."
-Ponder Stibbons

[23:02] <Veryslightlymad> CK dreams about me starring in porno?
[23:02] <CmdrKing> Pretty sure.

SnowFire

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #17 on: May 31, 2008, 12:29:34 AM »
An old one, lying around from the old boards.  Might as well use it.

The Obscured Visage
-by SnowFire

"Here!  Here at this ancient ceremonial site, deep in the Qlippoth, I shall make my stand!  Fate, karma, the Score, and even the True Runes have no power over this wretched life!"  The Masked Bishop drew out a dagger and made the markings on the altar.  "It is too late to stop these events now."

"My fellow replica, " the mysterious masked God-General Sync intoned as sonorously as a psuedo-13 year old could, "the time to free ourselves from this dark future by killing everyone else is now.  Soon, our terrible destinies shall be..."

The violins suddenly cut, and tinny yet heroic music began to play in the background.  A muscular warrior in a stylish butterfly mask stepped out from behind a pillar, striking a pose.

"I'm not sure I understood all that, but I know an evil plan when I hear one!  Prepare to face my submarine!"

The Masked Bishop staggered backward in shock.  "Guh-Grand Papillion?!! Im- impossible!  An idiot like you couldn't possibly have found our plan!"

"And you're quite right.  I couldn't have done it without one other."

A polite cough echoed from above, drawing attention to the mighty Mystere standing valiantly atop one of the pillars, cape flapping in the breeze.

In the distance, the rising sounds of a battle theme intro could be heard.

* Justice always prevails!  Even if sometimes it must hide its face.
* Akashic Torment and a True Rune introduce even these two do-gooders to angst and pain.
* The Suikoden detectives close the case and reveal everyone's secret identity, humiliating them.
* After an epic battle exhausts all, the four are kidnapped from the hospital and forcibly impressed into Tantalus's act.

Taishyr

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #18 on: May 31, 2008, 03:36:12 AM »
The Obscured Visage
-SnowFire

"Here! Here at this ancient ceremonial site, deep in the Qlippoth, I shall make my stand! Fate, karma, the Score, and even the True Runes have no power over this wretched life!" The Masked Bishop drew out a dagger and made the markings on the altar.  "It is too late to stop these events now."

"My fellow replica," the mysterious masked God-General Sync intoned as sonorously as a pseudo-13 year old could, "the time to free ourselves from this dark future by killing everyone else is now.  Soon, our terrible destinies shall be..."

The violins suddenly cut, and tinny, yet heroic music began to play in the background.  A muscular warrior in a stylish butterfly mask stepped out from behind a pillar, striking a pose.

"I'm not sure I understood all that, but I know an evil plan when I hear one!  Prepare to face my submarine!"

The Masked Bishop staggered backward in shock.  "Guh-Grand Papillion?!! Im- impossible!  An idiot like you couldn't possibly have found out our plan!"

"And you're quite right.  I couldn't have done it without one other."

A polite cough echoed from above, drawing attention to the mighty Mystere standing valiantly atop one of the pillars, cape flapping in the breeze.

In the distance, the rising sounds of a battle theme intro could be heard.

* Justice always prevails!  Even if sometimes it must hide its face.
* Akashic Torment and a True Rune introduce even these two do-gooders to angst and pain.
* The Suikoden detectives close the case and reveal everyone's secret identity, humiliating them.
* After an epic battle exhausts all, the four are kidnapped from the hospital and forcibly impressed into Tantalus's act.
« Last Edit: May 31, 2008, 04:01:46 AM by Taishyr »

SnowFire

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #19 on: June 07, 2008, 03:26:09 AM »
Platforming Leaps and Bounds
~Meeplelard

What's the most important rule to being ranked in the RPGDL? That's right: actually being in an RPG. And for most characters, that's all they'll ever see. However, some characters stand out among the group, both ranked and yet to be so, and have a whole extra gaming style under their belt.

First off, the contestants!

Hailing from the Mushroom Kingdom, we have two very well known characters, quite possibly the most recognizable in all of video games. One a plumber, the other a princess; give it up for Mario and Toadstool!

From the future, where a war between Humans and reploids for dominance over the planet is constantly afoot, two legendary Maverick Hunters, both S Class, have decided to grace us with their presence! While both have but one RPG to their name, one is often all you need, and they have plenty of other games. That's right, its X and Zero.

And naturally, how can you have Maverick Hunters without your Mavericks? While this Maverick might not be the one the hunters are use to, he is a Maverick nonetheless... none other than Jude Maverick of Filgaia! And his partner, from the same planet and series, his successor, and a rookie who loves Golems, Dean Stark! Can this team of two young boys who both wield exceptional ARMs have what it takes to overcome the trials? We'll find out!

And last but not least, two girls, one from Midgard, the other from Valhalla, both mains from the Valkyrie Profile series. That's right, its none other than Lenneth Valkyrie, and the host of her sister, Alicia!

All 4 teams have one thing in common: Platforming. Somewhere along the way, they have been forced into jumping around like crazed kangaroos as they evade the usual bottomless pits & spike traps.  So we're going to put their platforming TO THE TEST!

Each team will work their way through 4 levels, varying from standard Filgaian Ruins to the Fortress of Bowser to just your average underwater adventure battle against large robotic angler fish with laser beams.   The rules? Well, we have brought in a select group of referees to insure that things don't get...out of hand.  While we originally wanted to get them to participate, a certain wet blanket main character refused to join in, but a friend of his that goes by the name Citan Uzuki managed to convince the others to help out. That's right, armed with their jumping and sometimes flying Gears, we have the cast of Xenogears watching the event up close!  We're certain that they'll apply whatever rules they make up fairly.

So who will win this Epic Battle of Jumping, Block Breaking, and Spike Traps?

-Experience trumps all, even out of an RPG.  Mario and Toadstool win!
-X and Zero use their extra lives to pummel their way through all obstacles!
-YOUTHFUL SPIRIT gives Jude and Dean the edge!
-Photons, Ice Crystals, and Soul Crushing trumps all, Lenneth and Alicia take it!
-The added hidden condition of "Limited Lives" kicks in, and all teams lose before reaching the end.

Shale

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #20 on: June 07, 2008, 04:03:11 AM »
Platforming Leaps and Bounds
~Meeplelard

What's the most important rule about being ranked in the RPGDL? It’s not about stats, or being memorable, or looking better than Augst on a bad hair day. No, the simplest rule is this: If you’re not from an RPG, forget it. Most of the unwashed rabble – the Crash Bandicoots, Chuck Rocks, Samus Arans and the like, take one look at that rule and forget even trying to get into the arena. And nobody who’s actually from an RPG needs to worry.

However, some characters stand out among the group, both ranked and not, and have a whole extra gaming style under their belt. They straddle both worlds, and yet are forced to bring only their RPG selves to combat. But what if they could battle with their more mundane abilities? Run, jump, strike and dodge, all in real time? Who would prevail then?

Let’s see!

First off, the contestants!

Hailing from the Mushroom Kingdom, we have two very well known characters, quite possibly the most recognizable heroes in all of video games. One a plumber, the other a princess; give it up for Mario and Toadstool!

From the future, where a war between humans and reploids for dominance over the planet rages endlessly, two legendary Maverick Hunters, both S Class, have decided to grace us with their presence! While both have but one RPG to their name, one is often all you need, and they have plenty of other games. That's right, it’s X and Zero.

And naturally, how can you have Maverick Hunters without Mavericks? While this Maverick might not be the type Reploids are used to, he is a Maverick nonetheless... none other than Jude Maverick of Filgaia! And his partner, from the same planet and series, his successor, and a rookie who loves Golems, Dean Stark! Can this team of two young boys who both wield exceptional ARMs have what it takes to overcome the trials? We'll find out!

And last but not least, two girls, one from Midgard, the other from Valhalla, both protagonists from the Valkyrie Profile series. That's right, none other than Lenneth Valkyrie, and the host of her sister, Alicia!

All 4 teams have one thing in common: platforming. Somewhere along the way, they have been forced to jump around like crazed kangaroos as they evade the usual bottomless pits and spike traps.  So we're going to put their platforming TO THE TEST!

Each team will work their way through four levels, varying from standard Filgaian Ruins to the Fortress of Bowser to your average underwater adventure battle against large robotic angler fish with laser beams that shoot out of their noses.  The rules? Well, we have brought in a select group of referees to insure that things don't get...out of hand.  While we originally wanted to get them to participate, a certain wet blanket main character refused to join in, but a friend of his that goes by the name of Citan Uzuki managed to convince the others to help out. That's right, armed with their jumping and sometimes flying Gears, we have the cast of Xenogears watching the event up close!  We're certain that they'll apply whatever rules they make up fairly.

So who will win this epic battle of jumping, block-breaking, and spike traps?

-Experience trumps all, even out of an RPG.  Mario and Toadstool win!
-X and Zero use their extra lives to pummel their way through all obstacles!
-YOUTHFUL SPIRIT gives Jude and Dean the edge!
-Photons, Ice Crystals, and Soul Crushing trumps all, Lenneth and Alicia take it!
-The added hidden condition of "Limited Lives" kicks in, and all teams lose before reaching the end.
"Sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology."
-Ponder Stibbons

[23:02] <Veryslightlymad> CK dreams about me starring in porno?
[23:02] <CmdrKing> Pretty sure.

SnowFire

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #21 on: June 13, 2008, 06:19:39 AM »
Unheralded Battles of the Lion War: True Calculators vs. The Zombie Pirates
by SnowFire

{{ Picture:
http://www.geocities.com/snowinferno/calcsvbalthier.png  }}

Back in the early days of the Dueling League, Thunder God Cidolfas Orlandu met his match...  at the hands of 5 unlikely heroes.  Five people who believed in something greater than themselves.  Five disciples of pure mathematics, untainted by any applied magic or skills of other classes, who calculate their enemies' doom with Octagon Rods and Damage Split.

<a href="http://www.rpgdl.com/matchdetail.php?week=14&match=bonus1">Orlandu vs. the Calculus Crew</a>

With the release of a new version of Final Fantasy Tactics (bearing suspiciously changed names), new challengers have stepped forward to take on the True Calculators.  Sky Pirate Balthier, stuck in the timestream like fellow traveler Cloud, is a thief variant with a gun - a gun that can splatter meddling mathematicians all over the arena with his multi-hit Barrage skill.  And still mad about the incident at Fort Zeakden, Algus returns for revenge as a Zombie Dark Knight and sporting a suspicious new alias in "Argath."

Balthier's most formidable advantage is his speed, as he near-constantly double turns the sluggish scholars.  But the run & gun will only get Balthier so far thanks to Team Arithmetic's Auto-Life Angel Rings and Damage Split.  While it involves moving in close, Balthier can still solve that problem nicely by appropriating the Rings for himself with Steal Accessory, even if it leaves them one last Reraise.  Alternately, Steal Weapon can reduce their damage from "bad" to "laughable," and Arm Aim harassment before will remove their ability to do anything about it.  And if the Calculators try having good Zodiac compatibility to up their damage, well, that'll make Balthier's theft even likelier to succeed.  Argath's locked equipment and undead nature means that Angel Rings won't be an option for him, but his draining Night Sword does ensure he won't be dying any time soon.  This means that Balthier will have time to auto-revive even if he bites it while trying to steal.  As an additional insult, Argath is packing both Defense UP for less damage from physicals as well as the HP Restore Reaction skill such that if the Calculator's can't control their farce of "damage" extremely well, he stands a good chance of completely healing himself at critical with his 78 Brave.

Ramza's Matheletes have mapped out their own plan for victory, however.  The Boy's Club approach to Math may have unfortunate social consequences, but being entirely male will render them immune to Balthier's charms.  Furthermore, Balthier possesses no healing aside from the incredibly dangerous strategy of killing himself and letting Reraise give him back a smidgen of HP.  Once Balthier is killed once, it won't be hard at all to keep killing him as he revives and prevent him from getting too many turns, then rush Argath while Balthier is down.  And Argath's Night Sword's so-so damage is quite survivable at least for one hit, meaning Damage Split comes into play to return some damage back at him.  Argath may be the one who's a zombie, but the calculators are the ones with classic zombie tactics on their side - a shambling slow horde that simply doesn't stay dead.  You can't keep the truth down!

This battle will be settled in the Catacombs of Limberry Castle.  Will "Argath" cowering in a corner give Balthier enough time to subtract the mathematicians' possessions from them?  Or will everything add up for the Army of Algebra?

* The Sky Pirate plunders some loot and rare mathematical treatises with his faithful new Zombie first mate.
* The power of Math cannot be stopped.  Again.
« Last Edit: June 13, 2008, 07:09:40 AM by SnowFire »

Shale

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #22 on: June 14, 2008, 12:40:47 AM »
Unheralded Battles of the Lion War: True Calculators vs. The Zombie Pirates
by SnowFire

{{ Picture:
http://www.geocities.com/snowinferno/calcsvbalthier.png  }}

Back in the early days of the Dueling League, Thunder God Cidolfas Orlandu met his match...  at the hands of five unlikely heroes.  Five people who believed in something greater than themselves.  Five disciples of pure mathematics, untainted by any applied magic or skills of other classes, who calculate their enemies' doom with Octagon Rods and Damage Split.

<a href="http://www.rpgdl.com/matchdetail.php?week=14&match=bonus1">Orlandu vs. the Calculus Crew</a>

With the release of a new version of Final Fantasy Tactics (bearing suspiciously changed names), new challengers have stepped forward to take on the True Calculators.  Sky Pirate Balthier, stuck in the timestream like fellow traveler Cloud, is a thief variant with a gun - a gun that can splatter meddling mathematicians all over the arena with his multi-hit Barrage skill.  And still mad about the incident at Fort Zeakden, Algus returns for revenge as a Zombie Dark Knight and sporting a suspicious new alias in "Argath."

Balthier's most formidable advantage is his speed, as he near-constantly double turns the sluggish scholars.  But the run & gun will only get Balthier so far thanks to Team Arithmetic's Auto-Life Angel Rings and Damage Split.  While it involves moving in close, Balthier can still solve that problem nicely by appropriating the Rings for himself with Steal Accessory, even if it leaves them one last Reraise.  Alternately, Steal Weapon can reduce their damage from "bad" to "laughable," and Arm Aim harassment before will remove their ability to do anything about it.  And if the Calculators try having good Zodiac compatibility to up their damage, well, that'll make Balthier's theft even likelier to succeed.  Argath's locked equipment and undead nature means that Angel Rings won't be an option for him, but his draining Night Sword does ensure he won't be dying any time soon.  This means that Balthier will have time to auto-revive even if he bites it while trying to steal.  As an additional insult, Argath is packing both Defense UP for less damage from physicals as well as the HP Restore Reaction skill such that if the Calculator's can't control their farce of "damage" extremely well, he stands a good chance of completely healing himself at critical with his 78 Brave.

Ramza's Matheletes have mapped out their own plan for victory, however.  The Boy's Club approach to Math may have unfortunate social consequences, but being entirely male will render them immune to Balthier's charms.  Furthermore, Balthier possesses no healing aside from the incredibly dangerous strategy of killing himself and letting Reraise give him back a smidgen of HP.  Once Balthier is killed once, it won't be hard at all to keep killing him as he revives and prevent him from getting too many turns, then rush Argath while Balthier is down.  And Argath's Night Sword's so-so damage is quite survivable at least for one hit, meaning Damage Split comes into play to return some damage back at him.  Argath may be the one who's a zombie, but the calculators are the ones with classic zombie tactics on their side - a shambling slow horde that simply doesn't stay dead.  You can't keep the truth down!

This battle will be settled in the Catacombs of Limberry Castle.  Will "Argath" cowering in a corner give Balthier enough time to subtract the mathematicians' possessions from them?  Or will everything add up for the Army of Algebra?

* The Sky Pirate plunders some loot and rare mathematical treatises with his faithful new Zombie first mate.
* The power of Math cannot be stopped.  Again.
"Sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from technology."
-Ponder Stibbons

[23:02] <Veryslightlymad> CK dreams about me starring in porno?
[23:02] <CmdrKing> Pretty sure.

Meeplelard

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #23 on: June 20, 2008, 09:44:56 PM »
NOTE: Super said to use this one for a number of reasons, Snow Fire.  Naturally, De-Meeping is a must, etc.

Quality vs. Quantity: NDF style!
~Meeplelard

It was a rather typical day at the headquarters of the ever infamous Norgard Defense Force.  Having won their first actual victory not long ago against Graham Cray and Kooluk, having gained a powerful ally in the Black Knight, and two less powerful allies in Alonso and Gares...

...you know what?  This has nothing to do with anything, lets just cut to the chase.

"Wait, you mean that OTHER guy in big black armor is Vaynard's favorite now?"  shouted Gares, one of the new recruits, and Vaynard's latest officer.

"Yeah! It use to be me, but then that guy comes up, and pretends he's so awesome cause he can take down an half an army with one slash of his sword, not to mention completely turn the tide of a battle, and he steals the spot!" Duran responded.

Yes, that's right; even Vaynard was forced to acknowledge that the Black Knight was in fact a strong and competent ally, and played a bigger role than Duran in their victory against Kooluk (of course, saying Victory and referring to the NDF in the positive is still weird...)  No one knows why the Black Knight stayed around after that battle either...one can only assume it was pity that even he couldn't ignore.

"Well, I bet you anything that he staged that whole act against Kooluk just to get in this army!" Alonso shouted.

"...you know what? You're right!  There's no way he's that strong!  I bet you I could beat him easily!" Duran replied.

"You mean the same way he knocked you half a mile across the battlefield in one slash and onto a rock, cracking your spine in ways that only you could miraculously recover from?" said Wren Mk 3, who unfortunately, had to listen in on the whole conversation.

"...shut up! Nobody asked you! Go back to analyzing...whatever it is you do!"  Duran replied.

"I was merely suggesting that you are probably not enough alone to beat him if you wish to challenge him to a 'friendly' duel.  My data further suggests that he was going easy on you to."  Wren followed up.

"In that case, I shall join Duran in his conquest to reveal the truth behind this imposter!" Gares shouted, grabbing his axe.

"Hey, count me in!  This should be fun picking on the bosses favorite!  If we win, surely he'll acknowledge how strong we are and give us raises on our salary!" Alonso stated.

...of course, little does Alonso realize that Vaynard doesn't actually pay them anything.  Of course, Gares and Duran failed to recognize this factor either, so naturally, they just shouted in excitement about this.

"But it can't hurt for a little insurance, do we have any back up plans?" Alonso stated.

"I have just the person!  We'll ask Fairy for her strategic brilliance and she'll tell us exactly how to take him down!  With our combined powers and her battle genius, we cannot lose!" Duran exclaimed.

"Yes! LET THIS DAY BE KNOWN TO THE ENTIRE NORGARD DEFENSE FORCE!" Gares exclaimed.

And off the trio went.  Wren, having been forced to witness the whole event, suddenly realized that he can in fact feel emotions that he was never programmed to...

That being the emotion of sheer and utter disbelief, given that level of stupidity doesn't even register on his radar...literally.

-----

Somewhere else in the castle, the Black Knight sneezed.  Given he was certain he didn't have a cold, he knew SOMETHING unexpected was going to happen and it was inevitably going to involve him.

And indeed, something was about to occur!

However, the actual preliminary section leading up the fight are...uhh...safer left unknown for the sanity of all those reading this.  So instead, we'll just cut to the actual battle...

WHO WILL WIN THIS BATTLE OF...uhh...MIGHTY (?) WARRIORS!!!?!

-...its the Black Knight of Daien, what kind of outcome did you expect?
-The laws of all things natural are defied, the trio somehow wins through shear luck and...uh...DETERMINATION! Yes, that's it.
-Vaynard intervenes for whatever reason, fight ends prematurely as a result!
[21:39] <+Mega_Mettaur> so Snow...
[21:39] <+Mega_Mettaur> Sonic Chaos
[21:39] <+Hello-NewAgeHipsterDojimaDee> That's -brilliant-.

[17:02] <+Tengu_Man> Raven is a better comic relief PC than A

SnowFire

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Re: Bonus Match preparation.
« Reply #24 on: June 21, 2008, 02:32:38 AM »
Quality vs. Quantity: NDF style!
~Meeplelard

It was a rather typical day at the headquarters of the ever infamous Norgard Defense Force.  Having won their first actual victory not long ago against Graham Cray and Kooluk, having gained a powerful ally in the Black Knight, and two less powerful allies in Alonso and Gares...

...you know what?  This has nothing to do with anything.  Let's just cut to the chase.

"Wait, you mean that OTHER guy in big black armor is Vaynard's favorite now?"  shouted Gares, one of the new recruits, and Vaynard's latest officer.

"Yeah! It used to be me, but then that guy comes up, and pretends he's so awesome cause he can take down an half an army with one slash of his sword, not to mention completely turn the tide of a battle, and he steals the spot!" Duran responded.

Yes, that's right; even Vaynard was forced to acknowledge that the Black Knight was in fact a strong and competent ally, and played a bigger role than Duran in their victory against Kooluk (to the extent that the word "victory" and referring to the NDF in any positive way is still weird...)  No one knows why the Black Knight stayed around after that battle either... one can only assume it was pity that even he couldn't ignore.

"Well, I bet you anything that he staged that whole act against Kooluk just to get in this army!" Alonso yelled.

"...you know what? You're right!  There's no way he's that strong!  I bet you I could beat him easily!" Duran replied.

"You mean the same way he knocked you half a mile across the battlefield in one slash and onto a rock, cracking your spine in ways that only you could miraculously recover from?" said Wren Mk 3, who, unfortunately, had to listen in on the whole riotous conversation.

"...shut up! Nobody asked you! Go back to analyzing... whatever it is you do!"  Duran screamed.

"Transforming into jets, mostly.  I was merely suggesting that you alone are probably not enough to beat him if you wish to challenge him to a 'friendly' duel.  My data further suggests that he was going easy on you."

"In that case, I shall join Duran in his conquest to reveal the truth behind this impostor!" Gares shouted, grabbing his axe.

"Hey, count me in!  This should be fun picking on the boss's favorite!  If we win, surely Vaynard'll acknowledge how strong we are and give us raises on our salary!" Alonso stated.

...of course, little does Alonso realize that Vaynard doesn't actually pay them anything.  Of course, Gares and Duran failed to recognize this factor either, so naturally, they just shouted in excitement about this.

"But it can't hurt to have a little... insurance.  Do we have any back up plans?" Alonso stated, bringing his voice lower for the first time in the entire conversation.

Duran ignored this and continued yelling.  "I have just the person!  We'll ask my Fairy for her strategic brilliance and she'll tell us exactly how to take him down!  With our combined powers and her battle genius to rival the Silverbergs, we cannot lose!"

"Yes! LET THIS DAY BE KNOWN TO THE ENTIRE NORGARD DEFENSE FORCE!" Gares exclaimed.

And off the trio went.  Wren, having been forced to witness the whole sorry thing, suddenly realized that he can in fact feel emotions that he was never programmed to...

That being the emotion of sheer and utter disbelief, given that that level of stupidity doesn't even register.

-----

Somewhere else in the castle, the Black Knight sneezed.  Given he was certain he didn't have a cold, he knew SOMETHING unexpected was going to happen and it was inevitably going to involve him.

And indeed, something was about to occur!

However, the actual preliminary section leading up the fight are... uhh... safer left unknown for the sanity of all those reading this.  So we'll just cut to the actual battle...

WHO WILL WIN THIS BATTLE OF... uhh... MIGHTY (?) WARRIORS!!!?!

-The Black Knight of Daien.  What kind of outcome did you expect?
-The laws of all things natural are defied.  The trio somehow pulls through with sheer luck and... uh... DETERMINATION? Yes, that's it.
-Vaynard intervenes in this little fracas among the troops to take charge himself!  Or at least to try.