Two-Minute Game Reviews: Revived!

[Talaysen]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 3/10

Better than FE7, but not by enough to raise it by a full point.

>.>  Actually I probably should lower FE7.

Best feature/element: Optional encounters existing.  Sure, I didn't use them much, but finite EXP games are retarded, especially with lots of characters, random growth, and permadeath.  Honorable mention to stores being on the world map.  Funny how its best features are something almost every other RPG has already.  Fail.
Worst feature/element: Permadeath.  Fuck that shit.

Best character: Lute.  Obviously.  L'Arachel gets an honorable mention.
Worst character: I dunno.  Myrrh?

Best PC in-game: Uh... tough one.  Lute, L'Arachel, and Tana all ended up well for me.  Probably L'Arachel overall.  Mounted healer + had decent damage + avoid works.
Worst PC in-game: Uh... Dozla?  I didn't use a lot of people so I dunno.

[VySaika]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 7/10

Best feature/element: Multiple promotion paths
Worst feature/element: Snoozetastic enemies at endgame

Best character: Seth works. Good example of a knightly type that I like. Lute gets HM.
Worst character: Myrrh. See Meeple.

Best PC in-game: Gerik. Dude's just a beast. HM to Eph, Tana and Lute.
Worst PC in-game: Dozla? Sure.

Favorite moment: Getting to kill Valter~
Least favorite moment: Lyon gets the stone. See Meeple.

[Dark Holy Elf]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 7.5/10. I dunno, I think it's probably better than FE6? Otherwise, yeah, worst modern FE, etc.

Best feature/element: The usual awesome FE gameplay. HM open from the start, since that's the way the game really should be played in FE8's case.
Worst feature/element: Endgame NM challenge. They must have screwed up promoted enemy growths.

Oh, and anyone who praises this game for infinite exp then simultaneously turns around and complains about this game's challenge gets a "... what" from me.

Best character: Lyon. The two looks at him are neat, and in a plot largely consisting of cliches he puts a lot of twists on the whole demon possession stuff. He is singlehandedly the reason why FE8 plot > FE7 plot. HM to Eirika, see below.
Worst character: Myrrh, sure. Eph's also pretty bad in his own right but he gets to bounce off Lyon which would save anyone.

Best PC in-game: Ephraim. Reginleif SMAAASH, and all his stats are just way too good. Tana's also up there but starts a bit underlevelled. Lute, Colm, Eirika, Vanessa all get HMs as well.
Worst PC in-game: Mmm. Dozla. Syrene, statistically, is even worse, but she has flight (and in NM her bad stats don't matter!). Amelia/Ewan suck too but at least under some playstyles they become decent, Dozla/Syrene never do.

Favorite moment: Probably the bit Meeple put as least favourite. <_< Nah, just... the whole plot in that area? Eirika is like, the only FE lord who does imperfect things (barring Ike9... occasionally) and it's refreshing, and watching Lyon through that whole endgame arc was terrific.
Least favorite moment: Midgame in Ephraim's route. Fails. Watch Ephraim SINGLEHANDEDLY INVADE GRADO WITH HIS BRILLIANT STRATEGIES don't ask what they are they're brilliant! Plus all the neat characters from Eirika's route like Innes/Gerik being replaced by Duessel/Myrrh/Selena angst. I'd never play this route if not for his Endgame being cool.

[Shale]

Oh, and anyone who praises this game for infinite exp then simultaneously turns around and complains about this game's challenge gets a "... what" from me.

I can't speak for other people, but I used the random battles to get underleveled characters up to speed (which they're balanced for), not to level-grind the main game into dust. It allows you to use project characters without gimping the rest of your army.

[Dark Holy Elf]

Project characters are project characters for a reason, though. Getting infinite exp allows you to overcome their downsides at no cost, and since they generally have better stats than characters who require less effort, of course the game will be correspondingly easier if you build them up with free exp.

[Shale]

True, but endgame enemies fail more than enough when presented with standard characters raised to standard endgame levels; that can make the game easier (it can also just let you keep a wider variety of non-project characters up to snuff for variety's sake), but it's not the root cause of the easiness.

[Dark Holy Elf]

Well yes, I agree with that, hence my comment on the game's worst feature.

[Dhyerwolf]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 4

Best feature/element: I find the battles fun for a few rounds.
Worst feature/element: But then the battles never ever change, and they weren't that fun!

Best character:
Worst character: EIRIKA. Too stupid to live.

Best PC in-game: Tana
Worst PC in-game: Amelia. Note, I didn't use her because she decided to rush someone and died to a single hit. I think that's enough to qualify.

Favorite moment: Uh...I liked it when Amelia died. It was hilarious, because I hated her already.
Least favorite moment: Eirika hands over the stones despite being specifically warned about it. Characters can do imperfect things without being complete dumbasses! This was just a head-to-desk moment.

[Luther Lansfeld]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 8/10

Best feature/element: I like a lot of things about the game moderately. The characters, the story, the gameplay.
Worst feature/element: The challenge toward the end (although there are exceptions, like C19)

Best character: Lyon. Um, duh?
Worst character: Eirika. Stupid twat.

Best PC in-game: Ephraim. Despite there being a slew of decent characters, Eph is just really consistently badass. I also love Amelia for being fabulous but you have to do a bit of work with her, unlike Eph who starts as a death machine.
Worst PC in-game: Syrene or Ewan. Ewan, though, for the really bad defense.

Favorite moment: Nothing stands out. I found most of the Eph/Lyon stuff pretty solid.
Least favorite moment:

Eirika hands over the stones despite being specifically warned about it. Characters can do imperfect things without being complete dumbasses! This was just a head-to-desk moment.

[Jo'ou Ranbu]

Rating: 7/10. I find it better than FE6, but yeah. Decent, but not overwhelming.

Best feature/element: The general FE gameplay goodness with a dash more polish than FE7. Those were generally nice touches.
Worst feature/element: Uh, the challenge definitely takes it for me. The games reaches Grandia-tastic difficulty later on in the game, which makes Normal Mode utterly pointless.

Best character: N/A. I don't ever even watch FE plot scenes past the first playthrough, and I forget about the game plots entirely the minute I finish playing.
Worst character: N/A. FE8 is, as above, an uniform blur for me.

Best PC in-game: EPHRAIM SMASH. Honorable mention to Tana and Eirika.
Worst PC in-game: Uh, I'll go with Dozla, sure. Agh pre-promo berserkers with shoddy stats.

Favorite moment: Uh.
Least favorite moment: Erm.

You can really see how much I care about FE plot.

[Tonfa]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: We'll call it 7.5/10 today.

Best feature/element: Battle system.
Worst feature/element: Fog of War is still retarded, surprise surprise.

Best character: Rennac. Stylish and a riot. He's kinda like Balthier, except with GODLIKE RES.
Worst character: Tana. Managed to annoy me the entire time she was onscreen.

Best PC in-game: Ephraim. Receive the spears of destruction and such.
Worst PC in-game: Duessel. Haha legendary obsidian general what.

Favorite moment: Ballistae. In the sea. -Yes-
Least favorite moment: NO EIRIKA YOU ARE THE DEMONS

[Twilkitri]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 4.5/10 if I average what I'm forced to list it as and what I think it should be.

Best feature/element: Yeah I actually like the plot. I seem to be like the only person anywhere who does, even at FE-centric places.
Worst feature/element: Everything else? Let's go with the flagrant lack of difficulty. Hard mode should be hard.

Best character: FE8's characters don't really have all that much going for them. Let's say Glen.
Worst character: Selena. I tend to hate 'I know I'm doing the wrong thing but Ima do it anyway for stupid, stupid reasons' characters.

Best PC in-game: um um um let's go with Seth and Duessel for trashing hard mode. Myrrh can come too.
Worst PC in-game: I'm gonna throw 'any of the aftergame characters' out there for this.

[Nitori]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 5.5/10. I don't know why it seemed so much worse than FE7~

Best feature/element: Gameplay because this is FE.
Worst feature/element: A little too very easy~

Best character: Rennac~
Worst character: Myrrh~

Best PC in-game: Eirika~
Worst PC in-game: Amelia~

Favorite moment: Anytime I critted an enemy.
Least favorite moment: Anytime I missed ever~

[Ultradude]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 7/10 - a little better than FE6, for me, better on plot and polish.

Best feature/element: Branching promotions/Split path story. Gives me something different to do when I replay the game, and allows for at least a little customization.
Worst feature/element: Toooooo easy.

Best character: Errr... Rennac? Probably a slightly better cast than other FEs? I also like Valter, but that's just inexplicable psycho love.
Worst character: Ehhh... Myrrh is kinda pointless, and there were, as usual, plenty of epic apathy characters.

Best PC in-game: Ephraim. Sure, Tana and Eirika and Amelia and Ross and lots of other characters dominate, especially late-game... but uh, no one is quite so brutal every single step of the way.
Worst PC in-game: Dozla, I guess. I liked the trainees well enough, and Ross doesn't even need tower abuse to catch up because of the awesomeness of HATCHET.

Favorite moment: Endgame arc? Probably my favorite overall piece of FE story, out of 6-9. Lyon came across well, and I didn't mind Eirika's fail tooooo too much. Mostly cuz' I'd already pegged her as an airhead.

Also, SEA BALLISTA.
Least favorite moment: See: Elf

[Lord Ephraim]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 7/10

Best feature/element: choice of tower/ruin abuse or regular FE flow.  It doesn't give the urge to exp grind every enemy on the map to maximize levels.
Worst feature/element: Monsters, everything that attributes to why it's not as good as other FE is from monsters.  Monsters have shitty stats (which is why the endgame is awful), boring animations and serve no reason except "whomg there's monsters".  It's not like FE9/10's laguz race because they are actual characters or what not.

Best character: Rennac.  It's hilarious to see him squirm to his fate bound to some crazy pyscho princess.
Worst character: Fortimorttis. Stupid final boss.

Best PC in-game: Gerik. He's a badass motherfucker.
Worst PC in-game: Duessel. Sure Dolza is worse, but Duessel is some legendary general and he's completely awful.

Favorite moment:  Have to go with Sea Ballistae
Least favorite moment: Orson and his creepy zombie wife.  ewwwww.

[Tide]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 7/10. Better than 6, worse than 7. I rank the others at 7, guess you can say this one is middle ground.

Best feature/element: Different class changes was a neat addition. EXP being a finite resource at your choice is neat. Makes it such that you can use the varying other characters if you want to.
Worst feature/element: Some how seems more repetitive than the rest. Could be a combination of things including random battles (thus being a blessing and a curse), end game enemies not having any sort of flavour, etc.

Best character:Um...Lyon? He's the only one who actually feels like he has character.
Worst character: Fortimorttis. Yay, someone who manages to be even MORE generic in a game full of already generic characters and nameless monsters.

Best PC in-game: Ephraim. Solos maps with ease. The army at his back is really just icing!
Worst PC in-game: Syrene/Dozla. Both are a special type of fail. I'm going to say Syrene just because Dozla at least has some redeeming qualities (joins earlier, and has HP or something)

Favorite moment: "I'm going to put a messy end to your sorry life" *Reginleif critical* *KO*. Eph's endgame dialouge with Lyon is also good.
Least favorite moment: Orson and his creepy wife is a good one. Valter appearing on screen is another.

[Dunefar]

Rating: 1/10

Best feature/element: Random battles. Yes, the high point of this game is adding RANDOM BATTLES. I could end this review on that note and it would say it all.
Worst feature/element: Permadeath? Naw. While it's a giant gaping hole of failure, it's been mentioned. Let's go instead with..mmm. How about limited charge weapons? Sure, why not, there should be some variety to the cited failure.

Best character: I'll take, "Who's the prettiest burn unit victim for 200, Alex." (Eirika, I guess.)
Worst character:  All.

Best PC in-game: Eirika, I guess. I don't care beyond this since it turns into eyeing tables and pondering if .3 more strength is worth having .9 less luck on average.
Worst PC in-game: Dozla, sure.

Favorite moment: -
Least favorite moment: Take a screencap from any moment in the game. That'll do.

[Cmdr_King]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 8/10.  Had more fun with it than FE7.  STill, that feels high looking at it now, maybe I should knock it down a peg.

Best feature/element: Branching promotions.  Even if they were usually obvious!
Worst feature/element: Permadeath.  Worst idea ever, turns a single mistake into a reset.  Yes, this is the worst feature of every game I've played that has it.

Best character: Yeah, Lyon
Worst character: Eph, really.  There's presumably more boring characters but THEY don't have plot all the time.  ZzzZzzzZ

Best PC in-game: Eirika.  Though lord knows Tana and Eph are just as good, Eirika's more the style of PC I like.
Worst PC in-game: Duessel.  Probably technically better than the other failure prepromos, but THEY aren't stuck with Great Knight move restrictions at least!

Favorite moment: There's bound to be some specific scene that really captures Lyon, but I can't remember it clearly now.
Least favorite moment: Eh, whatever.

[Grefter]

Rating: 3/10

Best feature/element: Random battles and side dungeon.  HOLY SHIT LETTING PLAYER DO THINGS AT OWN PACE?  The first and only FE game with some vague merits as far as I am concerned.
Worst feature/element: I will go with weapon durability.  FE8 without the weapon durability shit is actually like 6/10 for me, I had fun playing it and have done it a few times.

Best character: Colm
Worst character:  Not Colm of Gerik.

Best PC in-game: Colm.
Worst PC in-game: DozlaI guess.

Favorite moment: Colm
Least favorite moment: The part where I started and hadn't kicked a link to codes out of Super.

[Shale]

Updating tomorrow, slackers.

[DjinnAndTonic]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 7.5 of 10, I enjoy the whole system and even most of the characters in general, but... Permadeath is frustrating on a level that would drop this game 2 points in a vacuum of bad points.

Best feature/element: Standard FE tactical gameplay. Branching promo paths are a second.
Worst feature/element: From the CKs: Permadeath.  Worst idea ever, turns a single mistake into a reset.  Yes, this is the worst feature of every game I've played that has it.

Best character: L'Arachel. Somewhat ditzy, though good-hearted and kind of pushy. This is the only kind of non-intelligent character I can stand, and I appreciated seeing one play a major part in the story. Very charming, I could see actually being friends with a person like this in real life.
Worst character: If we only count the forced characters? Seth maybe? Ephraim's pretty lame too.

Best PC in-game: Eirika. 
Worst PC in-game: Tempted to say Colm due to his complete lack of decent growth in my game (he's everything-screwed). This one goes to Dozla, though it was hard to be offended by him since I only used him so he could stand next to L'Arachel for funny supports.

Favorite moment: Pretty much anytime L'Arachel was being 'justice-minded' and dragging Rennac around.
Least favorite moment: "Ephraim's brilliant strategies" - pretty much anytime someone was wanking off Ephraim for things he never actually does.

[Shale]

Game: Fire Emblem: The Sacred Stones

Rating: 6.14

Best feature/element: A tie between the gameplay in general and the branching promotions in particular, with optional encounters/dungeons behind that.
Worst feature/element: It's really, really easy.

Best character: RENNAC. Lyon comes in second, but who cares about him?
Worst character: Myrrh.

Best PC in-game: Ephraim.
Worst PC in-game: Dozla.

Favorite moment: Thanks to a very spread-out field with a bunch of people not choosing one at all, the DL's favorite FE8 moment is...well, I can't say it any better than it already was:

Favorite moment: Ballistae. In the sea. -Yes-

Least favorite moment: Eirika displays the intelligence of drunk Rinoa with brain damage.

Next up!

Game: Final Fantasy IV

Rating:

Best feature/element:
Worst feature/element:

Best character:
Worst character:

Best PC in-game:
Worst PC in-game:

Favorite moment:
Least favorite moment:

[Cmdr_King]

Game: Final Fantasy IV

Rating: 5/10.  'salright.

Best feature/element: Music I guess.  More than a few classic themes cropped up here.
Worst feature/element: Still Alive~

Best character: There were characters besides Cecil?  (Edge is a pure DL thing)
Worst character: Kain.  Right, him.

Best PC in-game: Cecil.  At the end of the day, he was alive when everyone else wasn't.  Also, they didn't cruelly take him away constantly like Rosa, the other contender.
Worst PC in-game: Yang.  I can't bring myself to say Edward.

Favorite moment: Intro.  Pretty decent.
Least favorite moment: Manos, the Hand of Golbez.  Whut.

[Clear Tranquil]

Game: Final Fantasy IV

Rating: 5/10

Best feature/element: Rydia/twins
Worst feature/element: Rosa. Seriously though game mechanics were pretty awful as Jo'ou said below and that's more a feature whilst Rosa is ... a character yeah. Plus Rosa isn't *always* there (read thank god) whilst the gameplay/battleplay pretty much is.

Best character: Rydia
Worst character: Rosa

Best PC in-game: Been too long since I've played to really have a grasp on this =/
Worst PC in-game: Ros .. ah k Tellah <_< Rosa of the main PCs though.  I don't expect my healer to be a slow ass and healing take forever to pull off! >_>

Favorite moment: Rydia's tranformation from chibi to kickass woman? Saving the day and what not.
Least favorite moment: Cecil/Rosa lurv >_>

[Jo'ou Ranbu]

Game: Final Fantasy IV

Rating: 3/10. Uninspiring RPG with stab-worthy mechanics and dull everything else? Sounds like a winner. Nostalgia doesn't hold this thing up.

Best feature/element: Uhhhh... music? It's not -great-, but look at the competition.
Worst feature/element: The battle mechanics. Absurdly nonsensical and poorly done. The ATB system makes me want to stab things in the eye, and it'd be a dull, petrified system even without the stupid.

Best character: <CmdrKing> There were characters beside Cecil?
Worst character: Oh wait, Kain. He fails generically! Not sure if it counts as a character either, though.

Best PC in-game: Tossup between Cecil, Rosa and Rydia to me. All three are cornerstones of the team.
Worst PC in-game: Edward by a landslide. Besides that? Uh, all the temps are pretty underwhelming.

Favorite moment: There were interesting moments in FF4?
Least favorite moment: The INCREDIBLE CRYSTAL FETCHQUEST THAT NEVER ENDS AND EVERYTHING IT INVOLVES.