Good Morning, 2010! The Princess' Diary Intarwebs Edition

[Idun]

I just got my nails did.

And GL, Makkotah.

[BaconForTheSoul]

My local Game Stop invited me to a release party for FFXIII!!!!!! Starting now... I'll pass.  Not that I have anything against release parties, but this is the ghetto-est Game Stop ever and it's been open for all of a month, so no one knows it exists unless you live nearby, go to Subway, and be like "WTF, a new Game Stop!"  Pretty sure I can roll in at 12:01 and grab my game with little to no line.

50% extra on trade-ins was nice though.  Fuck you Sacred 2 and Folklore.

[Grefter]

Tea is awesome and if you can afford it a good white tea is good to have.  It has a similar taste to a mild green tea but will go down with no bitter taste (if prepared right, do not burn White Tea) and is just generally the smoothest tea you will ever have.

Gunpowder greens are nice, but real men (Like Jim's sister) drink Lapsang Souchong.

[NotMiki]

Lapsang Souchong tastes like cigarettes smell.  Real tea tastes natural: dirt, grass, bark, dry leaves.  That's the good stuff.

Speaking of the good stuff, I swear by adagio.com for tea.  Overpriced to be sure, but all their tea is fantastic.

[OblivionKnight]

Day 1 of Interview 1/5 = complete

Day 2...another 0800-2000.  Crazy >_>

[Jo'ou Ranbu]

Spoils from quitting former job: over 2k.

Last paycheck: 1.4k.

Man, the spoils are pretty okay. Now, to work on my tax files.

[Cotigo]

It's becoming more and more clear as to how I was using MJ to help me.  On days when every little thing gets to me, it's easy enough to not care about it after lighting up.  It's easy enough to center myself, as it were, when I don't give a shit about what's happening around me.  When I take every little minor thing as a personal insult, though, it's almost impossible to not let that loathing feed back on itself and build up to a temper tantrum. 

At first I thought it was because I hadn't eaten.  And then I thought it was because I hadn't had any alcohol since Tuesday.  But, no.  It is that I care too much about stupid shit that's easy enough to ignore after getting stoned.  I haven't relapsed yet as I have so many times with alcohol, but god damn it would be nice to just lay back and get high instead of being fixated on some sloppy cunt-faced California douchebag who rode through my work on his faggot-assed bicycle after I mopped the floors goddamn 5 hours ago. 

It hasn't been hard quitting, but reigning in my temper is much more of a pain in the ass than I expected.

[NotMiki]

Anger is a tricky thing.  I used to have anger issues I couldn't really deal with.  Not sure exactly why I don't now, but let me give you three pieces of advice anyway:

1. get more angry about important shit.  world peace, etc.  that kind of anger crowds out the petty, he-cut-me-in-line stuff.  Being angry about small stuff is justified, but as you are well aware it does you no good.

2. try replacing your anger with a healthy disdain for the flotsam of humanity.  Under this scheme, not getting angry about stuff is a sign of your inherent superiority.  Think of this as passive-aggressive Buddhism.

3. get older.  works wonders.

[Cmdr_King]

I'm pretty sure Zenny has 2 covered.  VERY covered.  Possibly outdone only by Grefter.

[Cotigo]

So yeah, now I have something to be angry about. 

I essentially got robbed last night.  I was walking home from the bar, hadn't been feeling too great since I had thought yesterday was so shitty, so I was venting.  Ended up doing something really stupid that caught the attention of campus security (pounding my fists on a car I guess?  I was really drunk; it's hard to recall), and so they threw me in the hospital's drunk tank-slash-psychiatric ward "for my own protection."  I'm hardly a threat to myself since self harm is STUPID and accomplishes nothing, but try telling that to a bunch of judgmental pigs who've clearly never been drunk and moody at the same time, eh?  Long story truncated, apparently they thought I was irrational enough to need supervision, and I'm out 150 bucks for said supervision.

Exactly HOW the decision to give them my credit card to pay for this bullshit wasn't considered to be made under duress (going from throwing a drunken temper tantrum to having a god damn gun pointed at my face), especially since they KNEW I was DRUNK ENOUGH TO NOT MAKE SMART DECISIONS, I don't think I will ever understand.  Exactly WHAT I was paying for, neither.  All those assholes did was take my blood pressure, make me sleep it off, and be extraordinarily judgmental. 

The only differences between this and being robbed at gunpoint are that I was being really stupid and that they told me it was "for my own good."

I don't expect any sympathy from you fucks but god do I need to rant.

EDIT:  Jim's right, though, I need to focus less on myself and more on the bigger picture.  I got out of this relatively unscathed.  I do have the $150 that they jacked from me, so it's not like I'm going into debt for this.  But if this happened to me, it's got to have happened to others who are less able to deal.  People have bad days sometimes and then they drink and then they vent.  It happens.  And when confronted by law enforcement they don't ever choose the right words because they're fucking drunk.  So how many people are getting legally robbed because they make stupid mistakes?  How many people are being squeezed through this meat grinder and coming out far worse off than they were beforehand?  How at all can I take action to stop this horseshit system of legitimized robbery, not to ease some personal vendetta but so some poor sap doesn't have the same thing happen to them?

The answer is I can't.  So I'm going to whine about it on the internet.

EDIT 2:  If it's not clear I understand why I was stopped by the police.  It looked like I was trying to break into a car.  Simple enough.  I just don't understand how me not actually committing a crime is grounds for this kind of horse shit.

[Grefter]

That is a good start, but you can be far more angry at everything rather than just specific incidents.  Anger management is essentialy the only reason I keep up my hard left socialist idealism some days, it is a fight I know that isn't going anywhere (which is the reason I contemplate abandoning it some days).

I reccomend taking up an ideology akin to Situationist International.  You get to be leftist and obscure enough to be elitist about it.

[Cotigo]

Eh.  I'm not to sure that getting all idealistic is the right path.  A lot of my anger stems from feeling so dang useless all the time, so being self consciously impotent doesn't strike me as the best of ideas. 

On the bright side, merely 5 hours later I'm not at all pissed about the situation (well, the 150 bucks, but there's as much use getting angry about that as there is anything else).  In fact it got me writing fiction again so that's kind of good.  "Nothing bad happens to writers; if nothing else you can put it in the third person and call it fiction" and all.  Should probably be revising some unfinished pieces instead since they're so close to being publishable but hey something's something right?

[NotMiki]

I'm hardly a threat to myself since self harm is STUPID and accomplishes nothing, but try telling that to a bunch of judgmental pigs who've clearly never been drunk and moody at the same time, eh?

It's well established that suicide police rates are far higher than the general population and depression is common in the force, so in a sense it's not too surprising that police would think that a moody drunk is a danger to himself.  People have the habit of projecting that kind of thing.

[Idun]

I'm bored in my relationship.





*PHEW* There. I said it. Have I said it to him? Yeah. "You bore me." What a pompous bitch I am. Maybe it's because I've been going out since he's been wanting to spend even less time prior to telling him this (Wow, an hour and then Battlefield?) and meeting guys who can actually hold a conversation.

I'm a bitch. Putting my personal life out on blast on a forum, but I have to put it somewhere and he knows what my LJ is. Not in the mood for him bitching about me talking about the things that suck about our relationship. I want to be away from him every time he decides that he has nothing to do and wants to spend time with me. At least it helped me read an entire dissertation in some hours yesterday for my research paper. *sigh*

[superaielman]

Idun: Ouch. Hope you can work it out and fix things, because you did seem really happy before.

[Grefter]

Three important rules for breaking up
Don't put off breaking up when you know you want to
Prolonging the situation only makes it worse
Tell him honestly, simply, kindly, but firmly
Don't make a big production
Don't make up an elaborate story
This will help you avoid a big tear jerking scene
If you wanna date other people say so
Be prepared for the boy to feel hurt and rejected
Even if you've gone together for only a short time,
And haven't been too serious,
There's still a feeling of rejection
When someone says she prefers the company of others
To your exclusive company,
But if you're honest, and direct,
And avoid making a flowery emotional speech when you brake the news,
The boy will respect you for your frankness,
And honestly he'll appreciate the kind of straight forward manner
In which you told him your decision
Unless he's a real jerk or a cry baby you'll remain friends

Edit - Don't take that as a stab at you Idun, I just like linking to good music.  That is how relationships go.  Especially relationships with nerds.

[Cotigo]

It's also incredibly good advice.  Also don't do that bullshit you're-broken-up-but-still-fucking nonsense.   Unless the two of you are very anti-drama it leads to nowhere good, and even if you are the two of you will just resent each other after a while anyway.

[BaconForTheSoul]

Right eye doesn't want to open.  Awesome!  Got punched 2 days ago and didn't think much of it, but that has to be why...  I didn't think punches were the type of thing to take 2 days to fully kick in, but I don't make it a habit of taking one in the face soo... could be wrong.

It's okay though.  FF13 doesn't require depth perception.

[Idun]

I don't know if I want to break up. I realize that perhaps I'm PMsing because my . is coming. However, I think if I don't see any changes before I'm about to move out, that's the best time. He's staying here, and I have a short tolerance and am quite an angry woman, so it wouldn't be a good situation for him. I'd probably kill him. Er, stab.

[Lady Door]

My dad finally found a job. It's not the one he wants, and not a permanent solution, but they've been running on fumes for a little bit and he kind of needed something. I mean, he's been without work for about 14 months now. In any case, this job is still okay for what my dad does and wants to do, so it's the temporary kind of solution that will hopefully lead into a permanent one.

Unfortunately, said job is not really within commuting distance of where they are currently living on that island, so they have to move out. Except see that part about 14 months with no income? Savings doesn't have much life left in it. So they are having to rent a one-room studio for my dad, my mom, the border collie and the cat to live in. The brother is also supposed to live there, if necessary, but...

Instead he's coming to live with me and Andrew for a while. I don't know how much I've talked about my brother before, so let me put it this way: he's 22, has neither a high school diploma nor a degree, and has not ever worked. Also, we have all of 750 square feet in our apartment, so this should be fun! The original idea was to upgrade to a 2 bedroom apartment -- which we've been wanting to do anyway -- but with Andrew not having a job and all...

I am not really looking forward to the next few months.

[Jo'ou Ranbu]

* Jo'ou Ranbu pats Ashley.

Okay, so weekend is done and I bought a bunch of shirts for work. Clothing is expensive. =(

On the other hand, the shirts look -fabulous-.

[superaielman]

Instead he's coming to live with me and Andrew for a while. I don't know how much I've talked about my brother before, so let me put it this way: he's 22, has neither a high school diploma nor a degree, and has not ever worked.

This sounds like it is going to end in tears, violence, and screaming. And you've talked about your brother before, specifically his breakup. Does he have any redeeming traits to offer humanity, or are you just SOL while he's there?


Snow: How much?

[Jo'ou Ranbu]

Totalled something like $400~ for six shirts. Half of them were on discount too.

[Bardiche]

Wow, Door. That's... he's as old as I am. I can't imagine anyone my age not having ever worked. I want to believe you're joking, or exaggerating, but with the news of NEETs lately...

[Lady Door]

He is smart, he is just lazy and/or unmotivated. To excuse his not doing anything, he has hidden behind the fact that my parents feel bad for him because of all the health/job/family crap that has been going on and that they like to live in suburban/semi-rural locations. They enable him by paying for internet and computer games because they feel bad for him and also don't have the health, time and energy to do what really needs to be done.

He really has not worked. He flunked out of high school because he didn't turn in the homework he did, and because he went to a friend's PE class rather than his own, etc. He has yet to get his GED. What he has been doing for the past 6-8 years: WoW (including selling his accounts to pay for computers and computer parts), Call of Duty and other online time-sucks.

He's also not allowed to bring his computer with him. Even if he did, the internet is slow and sucks and is definitely not WoW raiding material.

It is going to be painful, but hopefully tough love is what he needs to decide to do something about his life. I don't think he's ever stopped to think what life will be like in the next 6 years, or the 6 years after that, if he continues to do what he has been doing.

Also, Snow: fabulous shirts are totally worth the wallet pain.