Let's Play Some Motherf*$&ing Games: 2010!!!!!!

[NotMiki]

RS:MS - started another playthrough, this time with Aisha.  Goal is to recruit Freilei and Captain Silver as early as is possible (for morbid curiosity/stat topic purposes).  Beginning to realize there is a thing as too much efficiency in enemy avoidance - completed all the quests that don't have bosses too tough for me (not including the elemental monster ones, because I need to kill Pyrix to recruit Freilei early) so I needed to get into random encounters to progress time to...ER3.

[Pyro]

ER3. ER *3*. Dude, if you have done multiple quests that just makes you a freaking Ninja.

[NotMiki]

To be fair, each character starts with a certain amount of time on the clock, so to speak, so it differs from character to character how long it takes to get there, and Aisha starts with the least.  Sif and Albert, for example, are nearly impossible to get past their starting quests before ER3.  Also, on subsequent playthroughs you get a ton more money and jewels, so my party's well equipped to take out bosses before they can have their way with my puny HP.

[Just Another Day]

Oh yeah, games. Been playing Disgaea 3, right at the start of the aftergame now. Item world is like meditation. Character advancement seems better balanced: you're far more encouraged to reincarnate frequently (because class tier matters, and you unlock tiers one at a time), which tones down the leveling arms race that really characterizes Disgaea 1, at least, and 2 as well IIRC. A subtle change with far-reaching implications for strategy, which I like, though I'm probably hobbling myself mechanically by striving for variety. Ah well.

Oh, I was at PAX! Highlights, aside from all the drinking: Plane Weaver (clever, difficult platformer), Monaco (topdown heist strategy game, deep and detailed), Wakfu (Square-published new online co-op Tactics clone; due to its mmorpgness I dunno if I'll play it for reals, but it seemed really fun).

Played some Valkyria Chronicles 2, felt a lot like VC but on the PSP, so sure. Have friends who spent hours playing an early demo of The Witness, the next game by the Braid people.

Rock Band 3 is really cool. Brink looks slightly less cool than it did last year, but it's not really my thing anyhow. Really looking forward to Fallout New Vegas, though.

All the new motion capture games look unabashedly terrible, particularly the one where you're on a roller coaster colliding with shiny balls (!). The dance ones were a bit more defensible, I s'pose, but I was pretty sick of Lady Gaga by the end of the weekend.

Ordered Pokemon White yesterday. Glad I didn't decide to get a DSi. But disappointed that region-locking is making a comeback with Nintendo.

[DomaDragoon]

Brawl: Unlocked all characters and stages. Still maining Kirby because Kirby is more awesome and badass than whichever characters you like.

In addition, I found this game on WiiWare that I'm not sure you've heard of. It's pretty good and I'm certain that I'm the very first person at the DL to play this. It's called Cave Story.  I cleared the egg level. Playing without a guide or cheats or anything.

[Captain K.]

Cave Story?  Never heard of it, especially if it involves robots named after punctuation marks.

DQ9:  Got my first Alchemiracle, the Hypernova Sword.  Commence smashing.

[Cotigo]

In addition, I found this game on WiiWare that I'm not sure you've heard of. It's pretty good and I'm certain that I'm the very first person at the DL to play this. It's called Cave Story.  I cleared the egg level. Playing without a guide or cheats or anything.

Meh, sounds lame.  I mean, a story in a cave?  It's either a Metroid rip off or a linear game without secrets.  I'll pass.

SECRETLY:  omgomgomg cave story on the wii i am so downloading that tonight

[jsh357]

More SoE:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=984MeEZiLKw

So this monotype thing got a lot easier after Wattson.  Team of Skarmory/Swablu/Swellow/Gyarados/Pelipper/Crobat is tearing things open.  Tropius and Doduo will become available soon.  My body is ready.

I finished Other M, which was satisfying, though certainly not the best Metroid title to date. 

[Tide]

Brawl: Unlocked all characters and stages. Still maining Kirby because Kirby is more awesome and badass than whichever characters you like.

Meta Knight or GTFO.

Right, I play games too:

Pokeymanz HGSS -
I was having trouble trying to catch Kyogre primarily because of Aqua Ring and the things I needed to bring to fight it. Since I wanted one with a good nature and IVs, this was annoying. Things I had to bring included:

- A Surfer
- A Rock Climber
- A Synchronizer

Also one empty space at the end to quickly check on its stats instead of needing to fly back to the Pokemon Centre. This gave me a grand total of only two pokes to use on it, so yeah that was a pain. Same with Engima Stone Latios except there's no Heavy Balls for this one and I have to catch it at night for the x4 catch rate bonus on Dusk Balls. Soooooooooo, I just bugged hinode for some Master Balls >_>. Thanks hinode~ On that note, if someone has a SS Groudon, I will be happy to trade the Kyogre (and trade back afterwards) so I can trigger the Rayquaza event. Hopefully he doesn't heal.

Arc Rise Fantasia -
Around half way into the game. The characters are terrible, and the voice acting only adds to their horribleness. The worst character though is Adele. The plot also has more twists than a M Night Shamalyan novel. Battles are alright, and is pretty much what holds the game together, although WP gain rates really need to be higher instead of just getting a majority of them from bosses. Randoms starting to get competent is also good.

Wild ARMS 3 -
Abyss hunting notes and what not written. I'm more or less updating the wiki section for it as I am working again. http://www.rpgdl.com/wiki/index.php?title=Wild_ARMS_3/Stats . I've managed to create some absolutely broken set ups, which makes me . For all that its obviously pointless at this point.


RICHARD and Laggy's Super Sekrit Project of DOOM -
Man, I wish I still had the chat logs for my reactions. Instead, I have my notepad tabs. The bestest highlight?
- SEARCH SCOPE DOES DAMAGE. YESZ
Otherwise, Airbuster is now competent. I wiped twice . LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGY

[Fudozukushi]

Hey, I play games too still!

Megaman X6 (I didn't say good games): Hey looke after a week, or so of silence I actually care enough to play again.

Blizzard WolFang: Head to here because I need a part.  Then relize unarmored X can't actually reach it.  Dammit.  But that's what Shadow Armor is (sorta) for!  I go through, grab the lives-up and the part.  Yay, jumper!  Now I can actually have height when I jump!

Ground Scaravich: Alright, time to kill this bug.  Stage goes decently the first time through.  I get the Heart Tank room, goodie, and make it to the fourth(further? the hell firefox...)totem...  and whoops, it's the alternate teleport room.  And my inability to jump ever dooms me again.  Whatever, I go through AGAIN and get to the fourth totem and... are you shitting me?  Alternate room again?  Grah... this time I play it safe enough and actually get by.  Yay.  Boss is a joke, but seriously?  What else is new?

Blaz Heatnix(YEAHHHHHHHH!): Alright, Heaven or Hell, let's rock!  Since I can actually jump dumbnut one is no match for me.  Then during the actual stretch of level I get cocky and burn off two-thirds of my life dashing into fire.  Bah, I'm too manly for health!  Dumbnut two goes as well as I can be, but I'm down to about 1/10th of my life.  But so what?  Dumbnut three is right there and its... gonna kill me.  Damn.  Alright, full life, it goes down.  Here it is, the annoying hell that number four is.  First try lava gets me halfway up because jumper hits X's fat head into a platform.  Good news?  I find out Metal Anchor wrecks the fucker.  Try two I eat another lava bath.  Try three?  I'm golden.  Bastard dies and I laugh and all is right in the world.  Dumbnut five is a joke, seriously, what the hell?  Now finally up to Heatnix himself.  Bastard is also pathetic but the battle drags on because of his desire to drink lava and ram X's ass leaves him unhitable for-goddamn-ever.  Once he uses his godlike ability to reverse the way gravity works, I just Pop Overlimit and ream him.

Shield Sheldon: Here he is, the last boss of the eight.  Stage is a joke, but my arrogance in thinking that getting two hits off on him during his shell throw phase gets me damage way more than it should.  Once he busts out his constant invincible or unhitable crap I start sleeping from boredom and lose too much health.  Once I can actually hit him again I end up dropping down to a sliver of a bar before gutting him.  Yay.

Next up, Gate's lab.  Come join me and my inevitable loses against the Nightmare Mother.  Along with the dreaded Spike Wall at the start of the level that unarmored X can't actually scale without two parts and a boss ability.

[Sierra]

The plot also has more twists than a M Night Shamalyan novel.

So, it has two?

[Meeplelard]

Next up, Gate's lab.  Come join me and my inevitable loses against the Nightmare Mother.  Along with the dreaded Spike Wall at the start of the level that unarmored X can't actually scale without two parts and a boss ability.

Wait, are you saying that it IS in fact impossible for X to finish the game without the aid of optional items?  I remember the wall in question, I just figured I was missing some really round about trick with items, as I resorted to High JUmp + Blade Armor or some such.

[Fudozukushi]

Next up, Gate's lab.  Come join me and my inevitable loses against the Nightmare Mother.  Along with the dreaded Spike Wall at the start of the level that unarmored X can't actually scale without two parts and a boss ability.

Wait, are you saying that it IS in fact impossible for X to finish the game without the aid of optional items?  I remember the wall in question, I just figured I was missing some really round about trick with items, as I resorted to High JUmp + Blade Armor or some such.

Unarmored X can't beat the first level of Gate's Lab without the Ice Block Boss Weapon and the Jumper and Hyper Dash parts.  And the Falcon Armor probably can't do it either.

[SageAcrin]

Remember, kids, MMX6 wouldn't be horrible if it wasn't for it's stage design!

GODHAND:

Replaying this. I blame Elfboy. Cleared out Stage 1.

Playing this while rusty but being better in general at action games is a weird combo. I cleared with like 44 Die kills on Stage 1 but also had ten Continues(ignoring the restart-the-game at the start twice while I was learning the controls). Combination of lots of taunting/duck dodging/things that raise meter and then getting punched in the face while on Die.

Still didn't end up taking any bosses on that high. Would probably have beaten Gold/Silver on Die if it wasn't for the BS double elites that show up before them on Die and only on Die. That's wrong, guys.

Also I forgot how much I *hate* the initial moveset. Jesus guys Barrel Roll Kick is a horrible joke, Charge Punches don't have nearly enough hitbox for their role for my tastes(Though that is indeed more of a taste thing) and the straight kick is I'm told good for canceling. If so that's one of those things like Starfall canceling in DMC because it's hitbox(both hard to figure out when it begins and ends time-wise and for range and has the range of a Straight more or less.) is so bad that you're just asking for a mistake-based death.

It's okay though, it gives me a roundhouse. <3 roundhouse canceling.

Edit:

Oh and I beat the first fairy challenge while on Die, with no life left(as in the sliver that gets you killed even by the attacks that won't kill you if you have any more life than that left.). And with one Orb, though full Godhand. That was....not something I want to repeat. Ever.

Final Fantasy Tactics Advance 2:

Beat like two plot missions and over a dozen optional ones.

Yeah, this is generally a better FFTA so far. I'll get into details later, a lot of my opinion so far is up in the air a bit, but it's generally enjoyable.

[Dark Holy Elf]

Jesus guys Barrel Roll Kick is a horrible joke

No it isn't.

I got a reasonable amount of use out of that. Huge hitbox is huge, if you have the time to set it up it can clear out everyone near you while doing a modest amont of damage. Quite nice when you see yourself about to get swarmed. Yes, "if you have the time to set it up" is a significant if, but you have other moves for when you don't.

Kinda agreed on charge punches although they can punish certain boss moves decently.

[Meeplelard]

Charge moves have an interesting little gimmick that is overlooked, where in if you're in God Hand mode, and you start charging, the gauge decreases MUCH slower while you're charging (if at all), to the point where Spamming Charge Moves gets you more damage for your God Hand usage than simply using your combos over and over again.

[Sierra]

KotOR2: Dxun/Onderon/endgame stuff. I made Mandalore a melee fighter because his base strength was better than his dex, I had a mess of good strength boosters no one else wanted much, and nor was anyone else using melee weapons (well, Kreia was because I went basically the whole game without finding a single-bladed lightsaber, but that's it), so what the hell. It's kind of inspiring watching him mow through people with dual axes.

The latter portion of this game got curbstomped more brutally than even any Gust game I can think of. Sometime near the end I had to go into the options menu to make sure I hadn't put it on easy or something, but no, that's normal for you. At one point I wandered up to the Disciple and asked him to make healing supplies just to see what he would produce and he went, "Nah, you already have enough to supply an army." I checked inventory and holy shit, 80+ of the best first-aid kit, how did that happen without me noticing? Because no one needed them. I'd never used one. And that's even considering that I didn't even pick up the force lightning chain until pretty late (I had been ignoring dark side powers for the Exile due to being a lightsider, and only gave it to her when I saw how much carnage the allies were causing with it. I mostly used Visas and Kreia to experiment with dark side stuff). Force Storm is broken as fuck. Every Trayus Academy random boiled down to Stasis Field (almost never failed at stunning entire groups) -> Force Storm x2 -> couple saber slashes to mop up if anyone actually survived. Every now and then a marauder made the save and managed to hit me a couple times. This could be scary given jedi consular/master HP, but too little too late, guys.

In fairness, the final boss actually killed me a couple times. Exile's HP count was not stellar and getting stunned meant I'd get cut to pieces before being able to move again. So I decided making it a dramatic face-to-face battle could get tossed, buffed speed, and kited her around the arena sniping with lightning. Which she also had, but whatever, I had regen and she didn't.

Good game despite being piss easy (and not entirely finished). Allies are fun enough and Kreia is basically the best [insert non-hero videogame character role of choice] ever. That counts for a lot. Dramatic content is basically PS:T-, which means that it's only great. I missed the droid factory somehow, though, and this makes me sad. I probably didn't indulge in enough gratuitous sadism to befriend HK (I also only assembled him after the last group of knockoff HKs came looking for me, I think, and he specifically said in dialogue that he would need to encounter some of those to track down the source).

The ending? Well, having not played the game unpatched there's probably only a certain amount of disappointed I can be. Definitely sufficiently combat-heavy to be a slog near the end, especially since you're flying solo (it's more fun having Visas and HK along to help me eviscerate people), but the final encounters were satisfying so I don't have too many complaints. Aside from allies just vanishing. That's pretty glaring! Well, some of them showed up. Briefly. I think this was the patch's doing, though (I read the LP for the game a couple years ago and seem to remember the bots' sequence being mentioned as cut content. I also seem to remember that HK was supposed to show up, but I guess the lack of such here was a consequence of me not doing his sidequest. It was pretty weird having G0-T0 go, "No, we're not going to destroy the planet," and then watching the planet just get destroyed after all).

So long solo dungeon to finish the game was a bummer. If you're going to have all their fates flat-out narrated, though, that's the person to have do it.

Where does it end, unpatched? I kinda have to assume flying out of Malachor and even the credits aren't there in the original game because they had no sound or music in the patched version. But then again, it's not like that couldn't have been a bug.

[SageAcrin]

Jesus guys Barrel Roll Kick is a horrible joke

No it isn't.

I got a reasonable amount of use out of that. Huge hitbox is huge, if you have the time to set it up it can clear out everyone near you while doing a modest amont of damage. Quite nice when you see yourself about to get swarmed. Yes, "if you have the time to set it up" is a significant if, but you have other moves for when you don't.

Kinda agreed on charge punches although they can punish certain boss moves decently.

Oh, rephrase.

It's a poor move by Godhand standards. Sorry, that was a bit extreme.

Big issue is that setting it up requires actual space between you and the enemy, and the higher the difficulty gets, the more often they'll try to flank you. And while it's hitbox is indeed big, it's mostly sideways, yet not...quite big enough to hit a 90 degree flank. So it's practicality is very limited; We're talking, more limited than almost any move in the game. Added bonus points for, unlike charge attacks, having no control whatsoever over the move if, say, an enemy clips into a post and delays a quarter second, screwing your timing up.

Having said that, it's Godhand, so the move does the most damage of your initial moves, has a good launch effect, *does* have a good hitbox overall(just, not massive, which makes using it tricky. Generally I think it's a bit bigger than the roundhouses.) and if you whiff you're not instantly dead because the (huge-ass, non-cancelable I believe) recovery at least has good high invinco.

Edit: Mind you, though, this doesn't keep me from saying the *exact same words* I used before if I accidentally use it at the wrong time. I know it's not terrible, but that doesn't keep me from really disliking it compared to a lot of other moves.

[Dark Holy Elf]

Well, it's a bad move to use accidentally because it pretty much gives an enemy a free hit if you use it at the wrong time! So I don't blame you for your reaction, but I never regretted keeping a move slot for it for... pretty much the whole game. And yes, Roundhouses are good too, I used both and each clearly seemed to excel in its own situation.

[Crystalgate]

Final Fantasy Legend III: Decided to give it a try since what I know about it sounds cool. I assumed it probably isn't as cool as it sounds and I was right. Still not that bad though as long as I have the Game Lists FAQ and frame skip button ready.

So far I've stuck with humans and mutants. I'll give robot a try as soon as I have enough money to buy a crapload of capsules which I actually could do now with not that much grinding. I'll also see how the cyborg is holding up then.

I've recently started mucking around in the future. So far I've refused to do more than light grinding and had some close calls against bosses as a result. I've just got Cure 2 and with luck that makes the game easier (assuming future bosses aren't made much stronger to compensate for the better healing.)

[Meeplelard]

Darksiders Abridged: THE FINAL CHAPTER!

Famine: And so, when last we left the War and the Watcher...
Pestilence: They were totally getting the last heart for Samael.
Death: Which of course means this story is almost over!
Famine: DAMN IT! I thought we agreed I'd do the opening narrative! Why are you two butting in?
Pestilence: Look, I'm the ebodiment of everything weak and sickly, do you think I actually bother to think things out thoroughly, you starving jack ass?
Famine: That doesn't explain why Death just sort of interrupted you after you interrupted me!
Death: What? If you expected anything less than total dickery and douchiness from someone who literally exists just to watch things die, there's something horribly wrong with you.
War: HOLD IT! What are you three doing here?  You're not suppose to be in this game!
The 3 Other Horsemen: Uh...Council's Orders?
Watcher: Oh lets just finish up our own story and ignore your brothers.
War: Sounds good to me.

*Back in the actual plot*
Watcher: So you have the 4th heart, you know what to do with it.
War: Yes, we shall GO TREASURE HUN-...
Watcher: ...you did that already.
War: Oh...fine, I'll give this to Samael.
*at Samael's place*
Samael: Ah, yes, the final heart...GIVE IT TO ME NOW!
War: ...the Chosen didn't guard the tower, THEY GUARDED YOUR POWER, DIDN'T THEY!?
Samael: And if they did?
War: ...just checking! *hands Samael the heart*
Samael: Yo, thanks, I'm back at FULL POWER NOW! I could totally KICK YOUR ASS NOW TOO! ...except I'm on your side and I'm a GOOD businessman; I live up to my end of the bargain! I told you I'd get you into the tower, AND GET YOU IN I WILL!
Watcher: And how do you propose you'll do that?
*Samael opens an arbitrary portal*
Watcher: ...shutting up.

*War goes into the portal, gets into an arbitrary BLACK THRONE place thingy*
War: I smell a teaser final dungeon...
Watcher: What makes you say that?
War: That large angel over there chained to 3 ominous looking things.
Watcher: Well, KILL HIM! He's an Angel, they're pricks!
War: Way ahead of you!
Angel Guy: War, so you've come.
War: ...wait, you're Azrael, the ANgel of death...why are you here?
Azrael: Would you believe me if I told you I was playing with the souls of the dead?
War: ...
Azrael: Ok, more seriously, I fought that big Straga guy, got my butt kicked, he openned the Well of Souls, and now I'm stuck here being useless.  Could you maybe...I dunno...set me free by doing this elaborate dungeon?
War: What's in it for me?
Azrael: You get to kick Straga's ass and get your revenge.
War: Kick something's ass? I'M TOTALLY IN!

*one completely uneventful section of the dungeon later*
Watcher: Hey look! A Gauntlet of enemies! Maybe something new will pop out!
War: Like this game has the ability to make something creat-...
*Reaper guys who disappear and are TOTAL FUCKING WHORES TO FIGHT appear*
War: ...I hate it when you're right.
*one really stupid fight later*
War: I hope more of those things don't appear.
Watcher: According to this FAQ, there's at least 7 more of those we'll have to fight in the game...apparently, 4 appear in one gauntlet of monsters.
War: ...this is going to be a long final sequence...
*a little later*
War: Oh look, this dungeon has a treasure, I wonder what Zelda item its going to rip off of.
Watcher: Only one way to find out!
*You gained a Gun that can open Blue and Orange Portals.  HA! TRICKED YOU! YOU THOUGHT IT WAS A ZELDA RIP OFF BUT ITS NOT TOTALLY ORIGINAL MWAHAHAH!*
War: Well, at least I know the nature of this dungeon is going to be all about annoying Teleportation nonsense.
*GIANT GOLEM APPEARS*
Golem: RRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAARRRRRRR!
War: Oh god, not one of these!
Watcher: I didn't know you hated...
War: FUCKING SALESMEN!!!!
*Stabs the Golem in the Stomach then smashes it with its own flail, Beam of Light activated, huge teleportation puzzle that lasts this entire section of the dungeon starts*
Watcher: Say, War, I have a good idea...
War: Yes?
Watcher: Why don't we just skip all the puzzles and go straight to the interesting stuff like, I dunno, Boss Fights and Plot, considering we're just doing most of the same nonsense 2 more times?
War: Sounds like a plan!
*at Azrael after unlocking the other beams*
Azrael: Ah! Good! Now you go ebat up Straga!  I mean the 7th Seal wasn't broken...
War: 7th Seal? TELL ME WHAT YOU KNOW, BEFORE I KILL YOU!
Azrael: ...shit, I knew I shouldn't have said something, well, no avoiding this...CUE FLASHBACK!
*Flashback*
Abaddon: So I got an awesome idea.  LETS ATTACK EARTH AND START A HUGE BATTLE WITH HELL!
Azrael: That's gotta be the dumbest idea I've ever heard...
Abaddon: Oh come on, what could go wrong?  I'm only breaking 6 seals and the 4 Horsemen won't come out and well, you get the point!
Azrael: Fine, fine, if it'll shut you up.
Ulthane: I'm just here to give ye a huge sword.  Don't ask why I'm in Heaven.
*flashback ends*
Azrael: Yeah...the war was entirely our fault, not the Destroyer's.  Mostly Abaddon's, actually, cause if I said no, he'd probably just start throwing stuff at me until I said yes anyway, but either way...
Watcher: THERE!  A CONFESSION! WAR! KILL HIM NOW!
War: No.
Watcher: WHAT? I HAVE YOUR LEASH LISTEN TO ME!
War: He just confessed to his sins, that is enough...but I'll kill him anyway...
Azrael: Ah, but how will you get out of this tower?  If you kill Straga, THE TOWER COLLAPSES!  Let me live, and you may have a way out.
War: ...well, there you go; keeping him alive has a purpose afterall.
Watcher: Bah, you win this round!

*one teleporation later*
Straga: AH! STRAGA SEES YOU! STRAGA WANT TO EAT YOU! STRAGA KILL YOU AGAIN!
War: Look, I totally would have won that fight if it weren't for bullshit plot shenanigans killing me!
Straga: STRAGA HAVE BIGGER MACE! STRAGA WIN!
War: Lets do this! Lets see, how did I almost beat him last time?
*Flashback of War throwing a car at Straga repeatedly*
War: Aha! That's right, YOU HATE CARS! Now how about...wait, shit, THERE ARE NO CARS THIS TIME!
Straga: JUST AS STRAGA PLANNED! NO CARS MEANS STRAGA CAN'T GET HURT!
*War uses teleportation shenanigans to kick Straga's ass*
Straga: STRAGA KNEW HE SHOULDN'T HAVE BOUGHT DISCOUNT STAFF WITH TELEPORTATION SYMBOL ON IT!
War: Awesome, I'm totally gonna do an elaborate death animation this gu-...
*Straga eats War*
War: FUCK! Gotta think fast...wait! TELEPORTATION SYMBOL ON HIS TONGUE THAT WASN'T THERE 5 MINUTES AGO! I GOT IT!
*War does some weird teleportation shenanigans that goes against Darksider's physics of teleportation, slices Straga's face from the inside, lots of gore and blood shed occurs as well as a victory*
Watcher: You do realize that a simple "Please" would have let you pass, right?
War: Wait what?
Watcher: Oh, Straga's actually a nice guy once you get to know him.
War: ...
Azrael: Look, stop pining about Straga, he was a bit touched in the head if stupidly strong by the Chosen's standards.  What matters is if I CAN PROVE MYSELF USEFUL TO YOU!?
*Azrael teleports all three of them to Eden*
Azrael: SEE!?
War: ...why are we in Eden? I thought this place was suppose to have been destroyed.
Watcher: Same here, even if there were hints that it was still alive...
Azrael: Look, the city was destroyed ON THE OUTSIDE, but Abaddon PROTECTED OUR MOST SACRED POSSESSION.
War: You mean...*Dramatic Zoom up* THE TREE OF KNOWLEDGE!?
Azrael: Yes, and only a chosen one can go up to it...which is totally going to be you War.  No, don't ask questions it just is.  Oh, but you'll have problems getting there, cause those of Darkness cannot reach it.
War: But I'm from the Council, I'm suppose to be somewhere from IN BETWEEN.
Azrael: You just got splattered with Demon blood all over you, I think that counts as Darkness.
War: Just what do I have to do?
Azrael: Put this mask on, the rest will be self explanatory!
*You Gained TOTALLY NOT THE LENS OF TRUTH*

War: So I put this mask on and...
*DARK LINK Shadow War appears*
Watcher: Cue a boss fight, I suppose.
*Uneventful boss fight later*
Azrael: Good, now go alone...
Watcher: Well, lets get go...
Azrael: I SAID GO ALONE! ONLY WAR MAY SEE THIS! YOU WILL SIT THERE AND PLAY APPLES TO APPLES WITH ME NOW!
Watcher: ...how do you play APples to Apples with only 2 people?
Azrael: We Angels found a way!
Watcher: Now I'm intrigued.
*War reaches the top*
War: ok, so something is suppose to happen...
*Cue flashback*
War: (Crap)
Abaddon: Uriel, LETS GO BEAT UP HELL!
Uriel: Yes, my hot sexy master!
*Straga kills Abaddon*
Abaddon: How did I fail?
Disembodied Female Voice: MWAHAHAH! WE KNEW WHAT YOU WERE UP TO! So...Rule in Hell, or Serve in Heaven, WHAT'S YOUR CHOICE?
Abaddon: That's MADNESS! ...who WOULDN'T choose RULE IN HELL?
Disembodied Female Voice: Cool, NOW YOU ARE THE DESTROYER!
*Abaddon turns into a Dragon*
*shift to the Council*
Council #1: Ok, they've broken their promise!
Council #2: But we can't send the 4! The Seal isn't Broken, they'll never go!
Council #3: WAIT! We can pretend its broken, and send THE ONE WHO THINKS REVENGE IS ENOUGH AND TOTALLY USE HIM!
Council #4: THAT'S BRILLIANT!
*Scenes involving War doing stuff, getting his ass kicked, etc. happen*
War: ...that was pretty cryptic...guess I better go back to Azrael...wait, what's this hilt doing in what appears to be my dead body?
*You gained SOMETHING COMPLETELY USELESS*
Azrael: Oh, so what did you see...
War: Abaddon...IS THE DESTROYER!
*cue the ominous music*
Azrael: ...ok, anything else?
War: Uriel's going to get her ass kicked by him and I saw this special sword.
Azrael: THE SWORD OF ARMAGGEDDON! BUT IT WAS  DESTROYED! ...IOWs, go find the 7 pieces, and bring them to Ulthane.  LETS GO!
Watcher: Wait, you're forcing ONE LAST FETCH QUEST?
Azrael: Oh, its only running around the world, no real dungeons!
War: God I hate you angels...

*After gathering the 7 pieces through a bunch of tedious transportation related puzzles*
Uriel: Oh no you don't! There's a Boss fight in between that mess that me and War have to go through!
War: Oh, right, sorry for trying to skip that.
*4th wall restructured*
Uriel: THERE YOU ARE TRAITOR!
War: ...how am I a traitor? I was never on your side to begin with nor have I ever PRETENDED to be on your side?
Uriel: ...never the less, LETS MAKE A DEATH OATH! The two of us will duel, TWO GO IN! ONE GOES OUT!
War: You do realize that just means you're going to die.
Uriel: SHUT UP AND FIGHT ME!  GIVE ME BACK MY SEXY ABADDON DAMN IT!
War: ...right...
*one boss fight later with lines like "DON'T UNDERESTIMATE ME!" being spammed*
Uriel: No, I've lost! Ok, kill me.
War: ...I shall spare you.
Uriel: WHAT!?
War: I won, so I have the right to decide WHEN You die...I just don't think now is that time.  Besides, Abaddon is the Destroyer.  Maybe you should look into this.
Uriel: ...k, LATER!
Watcher: You really should kill her, YOU'RE DEFYING THE COUNCIL.
War: THE COUNCIL IS DEFYING ME!
Watcher: Wait what?
War: ...I don't know, it sounded good, lets go.

*At Ulthane*
Ulthane: NO! MY GREATEST WORK! It...it...*starts crying*
War: ...I brought the pieces and they're all here, you could just reforge it and make it EVEN BETTER.
Ulthane: Oh, right, good idea!
*Dramatic Reforging scene occurs, combined with showing Uriel and the Hell Guard fighting Abaddon and getting their ass kicked*
*War gains the Master Sword ARMAGGEDON SWORD*
Watcher: Good, now go to Azrael so you can KILL HIM!
War: Already on it!
*At Azrael*
War: So...Azrael...I'm gonna kill you now like I'm suppose to.
Azrael: You do realize I'm the only way you're going to reach Eden and thus fight the Destroyer, right?
War: ...oh...so I kind of have to leave you alive if I am to fulfill my duty?
Azrael: Pretty much.
War: Stupid technicalities.
*War gets sent to fight THE DESTROYER*
Destroyer: WAR!!! You're here...LET US START THE FINAL BATTLE!
War: OK THEN! FEAR MY SWORD OF...damn it, why does it have to be golden and flashy? Totally doesn't fit the embodiment of all that is violent.
*War jumps on Ruin, cue repetitive boss fight, that ends with a pseudo-quick time event and War smashing the huge freaking dragon through the floor*
War: HA! I Wi-...
Abaddon: Did you really think I'd have only ONE FORM?
War: ...so now you're a big dark angel with a sword?
Abaddon: Yes, yes I am.
War: ...sorry, but somehow, I think the Dragon form was more intimidating.
Abaddon: SHUT UP! Now, do you want to RULE IN HELL or SERVE IN HEAVEN.
War: ...*Stabs Abaddon in the face*
Abaddon: ARGH! MY FACE! MY ONE TRUE WEAKNESS!
War: Looks like I win!  Now, I'll be taking the 7th Sea-...UGH!
Watcher: AHAHAH! Did you really think this wouldn't be a ONE WAY TRIP!?
War: You...the Council...why?
Watcher: WE USED YOU YES! Now, with the Seal, YOUR POWER WILL NEVER RETURN!
Uriel: WAR! I've come to hel*Watcher bitchslaps her away*
Watcher: HA! I can do stuff now, SEE!?
Uriel: SO CAN I! *Impales War with the Armaggeddon Blade*
War: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO THAT FOR BITCH?
Uriel: Shut up, I'm mad because my lover was a traitorous asshole, and I'm kind of playing this by ear!
War: That doesn't make any sense!
Uriel: Oh look, THE 7TH SEAL! *Smashes it*
Watcher: What? NO! Why would you do-...
War: HA! I'M BACK AT FULL POWER BABY!
Watcher: Wait! War! Remember who holds your leash!  Do you want to betray the Council! DO YOU!?
War: ...yes *crushes the Watchers head*
Uriel: So...uh...yeah...you knew I was going to do that, didn't you? That's why you spared me, right? I won't be used!
War: No. I spared you cause of this stupid honor code I totally didn't have the rest of the game, which stated I didn't want The White Cities Honor to be lost with its Champion!
Uriel: That doesn't make any sense.
War: This is why I prefer fighting, its much simpler than logic.
Uriel: Agreed.  but...now the Council has branded you a traitor, the Heaven is going to hunt you for killing Abaddon, and Hell...well, they're just evil dicks anyway.  You're basically alone in this war.
War: You're not on my side.
Uriel: Well, I'm not gonna fight you NOW, but I WILL BE HONORED TO FIGHT YOU AGAIN WHEN THE TIME COMES!
War: ...whatever.
Uriel: But seriously, are you gonna do this alone?
War: *looks at the 7th Seal* No, not...alone...
*looks the sky, 3 beams of light are crashing down*

Famine: ...wait, you mean we actually get a cameo in this game?
Pestilence: I...uh...does being a random colored meteor count as a cameo?
Death: Oh shut up, and just end the freaking story already.
Famine: ...who did we decide was going to end the story?
Pestilence: ...
Death: ...
Famine: ...
War: And you guys wonder why I got my own game...

[Fudozukushi]

Where does it end, unpatched? I kinda have to assume flying out of Malachor and even the credits aren't there in the original game because they had no sound or music in the patched version. But then again, it's not like that couldn't have been a bug.

The fact that I can't even tell you despite going through the normal game a half-dozen times should tell you how forgettable it is.  Sure, it is MY memory, but even I can remember some things after enough repetition.

[Anthony Edward Stark]

Well, Civ V is out. Smell you jerks in a couple weeks I think.

[Grefter]

The credits are in the normal game, it ends with the ship flying out of Malachor V.  Given the ending to the game and whatnot I believe the credits with no audio is intentional and not an unfinished part.

[Clear Tranquil]

LO- I've have 22/36 Achievements. Not bad. Thinking of calling it quits for now though. I only have the arena battles, finding all Sed's pirates and the Temple of Enlightenment left to do but. ToE seems like a pain in ass and I'd like to leave something to do in a replay. Might feel more like doing it then. Seth, Ming, Jansen and Cooke are all over L60 now so probably time to go wreak revenge on the final boss and watch the ending again. Ming's side boss gives Slot +10 by the way!