FE13 rankings now that I beat it!
The Self-Insert Who Shagged Me Robin - Speed+/Luck -. Okay, so Robin gets decent damage, a 4HKO magical offense backup, counters and Ignis. Pretty typical middle-end FE slugging package, hitting both defenses aside (which is actually a nice perk when you're countering with it). Decent enough speed to double the sluggish, too. High Middle, I guess.
Mr. Foot Into Mouth Chrom - Misses the 2HKO by a hair, but on average, due to higher trigger rate on Aether, he should manage a two-rounding. Aether, unlike in-game, doesn't help his durability much, but the offensive push is appreciated. Plus, he can do some limited counter-healing stalling. High Middle works - maybe even the borderline. But he honestly needed better stats to go any further.
Pyromania Is Healthy Frederick - Low Light. Oh wow, those stats. Frederick is amazing enough to get doubled by -Bartre- (who also one-rounds him while at it because why the fuck not). To make matters worse, he doesn't even get a gimmick like the War Clerics (hahahaha luna as a slugfest-tilting move). Beats the likes of FF5 Thief maybe and not much else.
Doodles On Strategy Books Lissa - Low Light. The clerics are unquestionably horrible. As a Sage, Lissa's durability is -awful-, but she still scrapes a 3HKO - on the other hand, mimicking Ilyana stats for your slugfesting needs is just about the worst idea you could possibly have. May as well stick to Renewal cheese in order to have a shot against the Shadies of the world, even though that gets mitigated by the shit speed more often than not.
The Woman To End All Men Sully - 3HKOs, marginally above average durability both ways, some weapon triangle manipulation being viable due to As on both Swords and Lances. Not exciting, but some shade of Middle.
Incompetent Girlscout Stahl - Actually 2HKOs average! Weapon triangle manipulation! And tanky! Too bad about the crap speed. Middle, a bit worse than Sully in spite of 2HKOing. Being borderline doubled by average as a Paladin? Really? Not sure he wants Great Knight either, since that just makes him Kellam minus (actually comfortably doubled by average and the mdur turns into a shade of junk instead of averagish).
Archest Archer Virion Ruffles - His choices are interesting. Somewhat subpar melee counters that -do- add up and bow spoiling vs. marginally better durability and considerably better damage. He approaches a 2HKO as a Sniper (which means he 2HKOs a lot of lower-end losers), but as a Bow Knight, Virion Ruffles gets a few extra niches. Probably Light/Middle either way. He's likely to be -really- good in Light.
Vaike THE VAIKE - Low Heavy. I think he wants Warrior period due to the awesome melee spoiling and very solid 2HKO. Slow (as in doubled by average slow), but he can take hits and dishes it back nicely. As a Hero, Axebreaker and Sol are interesting and he still 2HKOs, but Counter is way bigger a spoiling threat. Counter+Brave Axe counter+Vaike's turn = holy crap that's a -lot- of damage, even though I scale Counter against the damage average.
Propitious Optimally Scientific Rigor Miriel - High Light. I suspect she wants Sage in spite of the egregious durability. As a Sage, she usually kills people who 2HKO her but are slower, due to 3HKOing solidly and counters, and being above average speed means she's not too terribly vulnerable to doubles. As a Dark Knight she... gets killed by people who 2HKO her but are slower, and otherwise is considerably more liable to getting doubled. More people 2HKO her by a lot, but the difference between a solid 3HKO and a 4HKO is pretty big. She oddly can 2HKO a fair deal of Lights, and needs no more than one of her turns and a counter if she goes Sage when this happens. Yeah, works. It's kinda impressive that Miriel actually scrapes average in spite of Braves existing in the curve (we all know she just wishes Celica's Gale was DL-legal, though. That'd be Waste-level offense running off her effective Mag. ALTERNATIVELY, scale my Miriel against DL-legal stats and now she's Heavy/Godlike, lulz 48 effective Magic+41 Speed+forged Celica's Gale rofl eat 1.8x PC HP a pop unless you're better than "doubles people who double average" speed).
There Is A Hole In My Heart That Can Only Be Filled With PIE Sumia - Sumia's slugfesting combo of Tana-level offense with Lutetastic durability across the board leads to a strange little package. +11.6 AS means she doubles pretty much everybody this side of WA4 bosses, so the damage gets crazy pretty fast. Against melee fighters, if she survives a hit or dodges, you're looking at upwards of 1.6x PC HP before the enemy gets a second turn, and that folds a lot of physical -tanks-, let alone lesser fighters. Against ST mages, who have to face pretty good mdur, forged Javelin counters mean they're not getting a second turn (doubled Javelin+doubled Brave Lance = 1.1x PC HP roughly) most of the time. Problem is her evade isn't that good - 37% is nice, since it means she evades turn two, but she often needs it turn one. And ITE is horrifying against her: she gets owned by Ryudo pretty horribly, for instance. Running off near-Yulie pdur in Heavy is pretty bad. Still, the weird durability split keeps her from being a terror in Heavy rather than shutting her out of the division. Not amazing, but I think she's a bit better than low Heavy in spite of the kleenex durability.
Wait Why Is This Armor Suit Walking Kellam - Godlike pdur! 2HKOs in a vaccuum! ... nearly gets doubled by people who get doubled by -average speed- and has accuracy issues. Counters keep him viable against fighters (seriously, over 3x PC HP to physicals what the -hell-), but mages fry him unless they're running off Miriel pdur. Low Middle.
DOOOOOOOOONNEEEEEEEEL Donnel - DNR. If I had to interp him, though, off to Low Light he'd go. Sub-Frederick stats will get you far, farmboy.
EEEEEEEEEEEK A GIRL Lon'qu - Hahahahaha that offense is nuts. +11 AS and 47% PC HP a swing alongside Astra? Yeah, he shreds things in a hurry if you let him get started, and Vantage has its uses if someone is unfortunate enough to land him into that range. Coinflip evade also lets him mitigate the Strawmantastic durability across the board to a degree. Heavy, definitely, and quite possibly on the high side of the division. FE13 Swordmasters are pretty much the cream of the crop in the series for cannoning.
Snow White Ricken - Eeeeeeew, 2HKOed and doubled by average as a Sage. His speed as a Dark Knight is even worse, but at least he actually takes hits a bit better... in exchange for 4HKOing. Dear god. Low Light, the last thing you want to do as a dueller is mimicking fucking Ilyana.
Bitch, I'm Fabulous Maribelle - Low Light. Speaking of mimicking Ilyana. Even worse as a Valkyrie than Lissa as a Sage, which is one hell of an accomplishment - Eruca-level pdur and 4HKO damage? You go, girl. Not that sub-Yulie durability off doubled-by-average speed and 14HKO damage as a War Cleric is any better. Renewal as a War Cleric lets her beat the truly inept, at least, and FORGED HAND AXE LETS HER BEAT JOGURT.
Whiskers Knight Panne - Game-best speed, solid to awesome evade and pdur are nice. She sucks at damage before doubles and the mdur is a little bit sketchy, but being as fast as she is lets her three-round typically and counters also help. Solid Middle.
Sweet Tooth Gaius - Gaius has to make a troublesome choice: awesome evade against better damage and Lethality. Honestly, I suspect he wants the latter: Trickster durability when things get through the evade is amazingly bad and Gaius risks having troubles against healers without Lethality, which adds up a lot better in a game where Braves are factored into the averages. Eirika-level offense is also pretty desirable in a vaccuum to boot. The evade makes quite a compelling case, though, because Gaius is hopelessly squishy on concrete no matter what. Off to Heavy either way - if he somehow could have Assassin with Lucky Seven in the DL, that'd be pretty much a ticket straight to a Heavy-champ calibur dueller, but oh well.
Writes Romantic Chrom Fanfic In Her Free Time Cordelia - She scrapes a 2HKO! She doubles average! She takes hits a lot better than Sumia! ... too bad she juuuuuuuuuust scrapes doubling average speed, which lowers her offensive potential immensely. She utterly shreds people with average speed and below, but struggles considerably more against people who are even slightly above average speed. Ends up clearly inferior as a dueller to Sumia due to that, though honestly I'm fine with this - she felt the inferior Peggie in game too. Which says more about how cool Peggies are even with the weaknesses. Low Heavy.
Gregor Is Most Fun! Gregor - Kinda slow, only decent damage and only modestly durable to physicals alongside having questionable magical durability. Axe spoiling and Sol are neat tricks at least, and it's not like he's a BAD slugger. Middle.
:japan: Nowi - That's a lot of durability and ranged counters are neat. Too bad about the crappy offense and poor speed, though. The fast can pierce through the durability given enough time and she is awful against healers. She is quite at home in a pure slugfest, though, offense woes notwithstanding, due to the sheer durability and counters. Some shade of Middle.
The Prettiest Axe-Wielding Lady Libra - Uh he takes hits better than Lissa and Maribelle and 5HKOs instead of lulzHKOs! Sub-Ricken speed dictates he languishes in Low Light regardless.
I Buy My Nightgowns In Hot Topic Tharja - Tharja is very interesting. The accuracy in a vaccuum is egregious, but it's mitigated considerably against melee fighters (and, to be quite honest, it only matters to me against people whose magical evasion -exists-, which makes it a lot less problematic) and, against mages, Tomebreaker turns her into a terror all around. Acceptable, if subpar durability both ways doesn't hurt either. And then, there are the Vengeance games that can happen, which play off Nosferatu cheese nicely. There's just a lot of ways she can steal wins from her foes - this is likely as gimmicky as a FE PC will get without bending the system into a monstrosity, and it works mostly in her favor. Fears the notably fast, but she's otherwise strangely good. Middle/Heavy, though I may be overselling her a bit.
Fantastic Unlimited Merchants Anna - 4-5HKO magical damage or 6HKO physical running off barely above average FE speed and crap durability. At least she dodges a lot and counters! Light, which is a travesty compared to her amazing in-game worth.
Makes Sylvia Look Good In-Game Olivia - Somehow, Olivia ends up a better dueller than Anna, which is just so wrong. Offense sucks and durability is junk, but she doubles average and counters, which makes her kinda decent in Light.
Sewstress Doolittle Cherche - 60 damage Brave Axe thwacks are scary, guys. Speed is pretty trashy, which leaves her vulnerable (at least she's not doubled by average), and she just sucks against magic, but spoiling swordsmen is a cool niche, she's good at tanking physicals and it's hard to argue with dat axe to the face. Low Heavy.
^_^ Henry - Dear lord the speed is horrible. On the other hand, outside that, he has Tharja's goodness off much better accuracy and considerably better durability, which keeps him viable. Hates 2HKO physicals that aren't egregiously slow with a passion (good thing he's physically durable), but otherwise is just as cheesy and interesting as Tharja. Neat Middle.
i am twelve and what is this Lucina - Hahaha, I said Lon'qu's offense was unbalanced? Let's talk about Lucina, honey. Cordelia-level base damage and speed that's just shy of doubling people who double average with a side dish of Aether+Rightful Queen -and- solid durability and evade across the board. That's pretty much OHKO-level offense whenever she doubles -before- any Aether proc chances and it just rises into gross overkill as you pile them up (if she doubles and procs Aether even once, we're looking at 131 FE13 damage. Just for fun theoretics games: Aether x4 - the maximum amount of times it can trigger in a given non-counter turn - ekes 236 damage, something along the lines of 2.55x PC HP. If someone triggers a melee counter, that's not very far from the offense she averages counting her own turn and the counter. So, um. get wrecked?). And she can even play her dad's counter-healing game because fuck you (for whatever good it'll do in the higher divisions). She isn't quite statistically dominant enough to etch her straight into the highest division, but she certainly rides the Heavy/Godlike border like a champ.
My Plot Is Fucking Stupid Say'ri - Doesn't quite double people who double average and doesn't quite reach coinflip-level evade, but she's close both ways and takes hits considerably better than Lon'qu. Amatsu makes for a neat ranged option for a one-turning against non-melee as well. A good Heavy pretty easily, much like Lon'qu.
Job-Killing Socialist Tiki - Nowi, only better in every single way that matters. Actually 3HKOs, takes hits almost as well as a Breath of Fire lategame boss and even has decent evade on odd-numbered turns. This is a deceptively powerful slugging package, though she fears healers about as much as Nowi does. Low Heavy works, sure.
Elfboy Flavia - Pretty much a better Gregor. Really wishes she actually had those extra levels that let her scrape a 2HKO to average and doubling average speed people, but she's close either way. Sol and axe spoiling are also neat. Middle/Heavy, I guess? May be overselling her a bit.
Ciatos HELL NO! Basilio - A better Vaike, pretty much. Not sure by how much to matter, but certainly rides Heavy well enough.
I KISS YOU Gangrel - High Heavy. The speed is crazy and so is the evade before he gets a turn. The physical durability is awful, but have fun hitting him until he gets going with Lucky Seven+fort bonuses - and have fun eating 4x Levin Sword smacks in retaliation. He nearly doubles people who double average as it stands, which makes his offense really dangerous. He can also usually take a single magic thwack if need be.
Cap'n Crunch Cervantes - Um I'm not sure if he's appreciably better than Kellam at all, FE boss HP is a thing. Physical durability is appreciable with ranged counters, but man, he's so slow and he gets fried badly against magic. He really needed to 2HKO to boot. Light/Middle, probably.
Mike Meyers Excellus - The physical durability is egregiously bad, which makes him give up any hope of going anywhere above Light. Sometimes, he'll live through a magic attack and fry his opposition because Forged Bolganone hurts like -fuck-, but otherwise, yeah.
Red Riding Valmar's Horn Walhart - Decent ranged 2HKO and good defenses (particularly physical) save his durability to a degree, though I think he's likely still well sub-PC HP to magic. Falls juuuuuuust short of doubling average, which is a relief, because you're -dead- if he does. Even has a case not to lose average tiebreak initiative due to his insane threat range, though he often wants to enjoy his first turn durability off throne bonuses, methinks. Some shade of Heavy.
Tim Curry Validar - Middling 2HKO and could stand to be faster, though Vengeance makes him cute against stallers and Dragonskin actually gives him durability. Pretty much a spin on the Nergal/Lyon mold without the egregious failure. High Middle, I guess? Only boss in the game to have a case for -some- sort of status immunity (at least he immunes ID), too.
Foxxy Cleopatra Aversa - Um. Goetia off +11 Attack Speed is downright insane offense, but going last off -that- pdur is asking for trouble. She reminds me of boss Lieselotte, who leaves a lot of smoldering corpses behind her wake if you let her get a turn, but gets OHKOed right and left - and Aversa has the problem of being even worse off at initiative, though her effective offense is somehow even more ridiculous (seriously, Goetia x4 is somewhere in the realm of 2.8x PC HP. That splatters a lot of Godlikes, for god's sake). At least she can take one average magical attack, I think. Low Middle, probably.
Self-Insert Megazord Grima - Um. This is kind of a Lezard situation, though I'm inclined to be more generous to plot barriers granted by a skill (that actually -has been seen before in-game!-) rather than given by tri-ace.tif. So, assuming the barrier works, uh. The raw HP's still egregious suck - roughly 40% advantage over Aversa may sound good before you realize how -awful- her raw HP is (Megazord hovers possibly around 40% PC HP for me? Hard to say. You can tell how much credit I give Aversa there, though), but Megazord more or less quarters damage across the board with the combo of Dragonskin and raw defenses, which gives it actual durability. Decent speed and middle-area, 1-2 range 2HKO also work in its favor, though it always loses initiative. I'd have to see how Dragonskin interacts with skills like Ignis and Luna in order to gauge how I'd view it against ITD (i.e. if it halves the damage boost granted by those skills or not), though I'd only consider Ignis and Luna in FE13 partly ITD. Ignis on the creature itself also grants a cute gimmick against healers and Anathema has its uses. Probably a High Heavy, all things considered. Without Dragonskin, High Middle. Durability's considerably better than Foxxy Cleopatra's, but the effective offense is sensibly worse (Megazord doesn't even double average!). 2HKOing at base with ranged counters still goes a decent way, though, especially when you're not getting OHKOed by average damage. So, you pretty much have Validar with better speed but likely less effective durability. But that's all theorycraft. IN PRACTICE: DNR.