Author Topic: Son of Caption Contest (Possible eventual table breaking) (Read 5661 times)

Veryslightlymad · « **on:** March 07, 2008, 07:04:43 AM »

Dun dun DUN!

So yeah. Scanner is readily available. I have oodles of free time. Let's get some caption contest juices flowing.

The rules are simple. You submit to me (via board PM) one sample of text that I will insert into this image. I pick the one I like the best and that person "wins". Their panel is featured with the text (very poorly) replaced. Then we do it again. It's simple, quick, and quite a lot of fun.
Please try to fill all balloons as I am terrible with photoshop and cannot replace panels.
~~~~~~~~~~

What in the heck is going on here?! (Image taken from Ultimate Spider-Man 110. Art by Mark Bagley

DAREDEVIL:

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #1 on:** March 08, 2008, 09:21:09 AM »

This round's winner is.....

Sir Alex!

Other contributions received:
"No!" "Never again!" "Not another girlfriend in the fridge!" "You can't have her!" ~ Cmdr_King

"Hola Kingpin!" "Dude!" "I just nailed your wife." "That was sweet." ~ Captain K. The cap'n, for what it's worth, gets an EXTRA SPECIAL BONUS POINT for being the only contributer this contest to correctly identify Vanessa Fisk as Wilson's wife.

"Look, dude. It's not what it looks like. I'm just tired." "Tired of always fighting you, tired of always being the one you despise. I'm tired. Tired and alone." "And I've stopped caring what anyone else thinks. I wear this for a reason, you know. So." "Go close that door. They don't need to see this. No one else does. Just you and I." ~ Taishyr
~~~~~~~~~~~~

Four submissions in a day. I almost left it open two days, but Hatbot told me not to. Updates won't necessarily be daily. I'll try to keep a balance between lots of new contests and leaving them open so there's enough submissions.

New contest will begin in a few minutes.

Taishyr · « **Reply #2 on:** March 08, 2008, 09:30:07 AM »

I didn't realize there was a woman there.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #3 on:** March 08, 2008, 09:35:12 AM »

Actual dialogue in the daredevil caption:
"I know all about your wife. Her mystery coma." "I have a theory about it, too." "Could it be that she realized what a horror you are..." "...and her brain just... shut down?!!" ~ Brian Michael Bendis

COMPLETELY MEANINGLESS STANDINGS:

Sir Alex ~ 3 pts (I have arbitrarily assigned 3 points to the last winner.
Captain K. ~ 1 pt (Also arbitrary)
Brian Michael Bendis ~ -1 point. (Just kidding. <3 for Bendis)

WE VERY WELL MAY NEVER SEE STANDINGS IN THIS TOPIC AGAIN. On to this week's caption, an intimate moment between husband and wife. (Art taken from Amazing Spider-Man #541, art by Ron Garney)

The captions are read in the following order
MARY-JANE WATSON-PARKER
PETER PARKER (1, 2)
MARY-JANE WATSON-PARKER

Good luck, everyone.

Grefter · « **Reply #4 on:** March 09, 2008, 01:10:33 AM »

Dammit I meant to send in this for the first one.

"Oh my god!" "THey know now!" "Our secret love has been outed by anonymous" "They do not forgive, they do not forget! WE ARE GOING TO BE RAPED."

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #5 on:** March 11, 2008, 07:07:24 AM »

This week's winner would be ZENNY!

.......But because his caption is too long, I gave it to GREFTER. Congratulations are in order to Grefter, the only submission who did not make a nok-nok joke. (Get it?)

OTHER SUBMISSIONS:

"Peter, it's not that bad. Don't be a woman about this."
"It is that bad, okay? It's murder.-- The murder of the English language. Those 'Knocks' have been butchered."
"That isn't murder. If you want to see murder, go back in time. Yeah, that's right. I made an Uncle Ben dying joke. What are you going to do about it? Cry? Oh, wait. Yes you are." ~ Zenthor
The extra hilarious thing about this comment is that this panel is taken with the two characters over Aunt May's hospital bed, where she too, has just been shot.

"Come on, dear. This Straczynski guy's only been writing us for 70 issues. At least let him make 100." "'Nok-nok?'" "Seriously, ****ing Nok-nok?" "I have two hyphens in my name." ~ Sir Alex

"Peter, are those mental powers you obtained on your trip to the Nok-Nok's alien planet giving you a headache again?" "Yes, they are." "And for some reason, I can't stop thinking about Cheese Whiz." "Damn those Nok-Noks! If I ever meet them again, I'll tell them wha...GASP! Who's at the door?" ~ Captain K.

"Honey, quit averting your eyesight and face your demons head-on!" "DON'T WANNA SEE NOK-NOK, DON'T WANNA SEE NOK-NOK, OH GOD IT'S STILL ON THE WINDOW FRAME!" "First it took a chunk out of his arm, now it's taken his sanity. Truly Nok-Nok is greatest villain we've yet faced." ~AAA

ACTUAL DIALOGUE
"Peter, you shouldn't be going anywhere. After giving that much blood, you need to lie down, you're going to be weak--" "I can't, I--" "I have to be somewhere" "Peter, listen to me, you're in no condition to--" ~ J. Michael Straczynski

It makes more sense in context. Probably. New contest in a few minutes.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #6 on:** March 11, 2008, 07:21:39 AM »

STANDINGS:

Sir Alex ~ 3 pts
Grefter ~ 3 pts
Captain K. ~ 1 pt
Zenny ~ A for Effort
Marvel Comics Writing Staff ~ -2 points
Veryslightlymad ~ Peerless
AAA ~ Three... as for effort?
Taishyr ~ Stuck in fucking CHINA

Standings return, but for how long?
I thought I'd take a turn for the surrealist with today's contest. (Art initially from Endangered Species Chapter 17, originally printed in X-men #204. Art is by Scot Eaton.)

(Click for big)

EDIT
Stupid me, I forgot character prompts:

SCARLET WITCH (1, 2)
THE BEAST

Grefter · « **Reply #7 on:** March 11, 2008, 11:03:09 AM »

No nod for my in universe jokes about how Skrulls are trannies? You make me sad. (I am not making that up. Also if you are reading this and don't know what Skrulls are here and note that they are a super common excuse for people having been killed and coming back, Skrulls shape shift and are body doubles that die when the plot calls for dramatic death a lot).

Captain K. · « **Reply #8 on:** March 11, 2008, 11:41:36 PM »

Damn, I thought I'd get a point for the Groo reference.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #9 on:** March 16, 2008, 06:46:31 AM »

Late update for 1)Smash and 2)Waiting for responses that never came

So...

This round's winner is ZENTHOR with the following contribution (click for big)

I dunno. This just got so much funnier when I actually put it on panel.

OTHER CONTRIBUTIONS:
Cmdr_King
Scarlet: There. You have... 45 minutes.
Scarlet: So... what do you think of my luscious boobs?
Beast: That depends. Going to manifest a bed?

Grefter:
Scarlet Fail Plot Elements 1 "I drink from egg timer"
House of M for the Fail 2 "It tastes like my soul and boots"
The Beast " "

I thought I'd leave Grefter's submission as-is instead of writing it out the long way as I've been doing, because his hatred of Scarlet Witch Plot Devicery has merit!

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #10 on:** March 16, 2008, 07:08:06 AM »

Actual content of previous panel:
"Close your eyes, Henry. A watched pot never boils."
"Close your eyes and it'll soon be over"
"I don't know that I want it to be over" ~ Mike Carey

.....so.... kind of a mix between the three submissions.

NEW AND IMPROVED STANDINGS (not to be confused with last week's standings)
Grefter ~ 5 pts
Zenthor ~ 3 pts
Cmdr_King ~ 2 pts
Marvel Comics Writing Staff ~ -3 points
Veryslightlymad ~ Needs to clean his scanner, but can't find the windex
Everyone else ~ Submit something!

Today's contest is from Fantastic Four #544, and get used to that issue, folks, because it has a few goofy panels I want to use. (I'll use a different comic for next contest. I promise.) Art is by Paul Pelletier, and he's not really bad, but boy did this issue have some goofy panels. (click for big)

BLACK PANTHER:
STORM:

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #11 on:** March 17, 2008, 10:47:15 AM »

Today's winner is.......

EVERYONE!
(click images for big)
(Captain K)

(Cmdr_King)

(Grefter)

(Ryogo)

(Zenthor)

MORAL OF THE STORY:
When Black Panther busts out the sex toys, we all win.

New contest in a few.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #12 on:** March 17, 2008, 11:01:28 AM »

Actual dialog:

"There was a black hole here, one with an electric charge."
"Can your instruments track it?"
~Dwayne McDuffie
(I can think of one black hole that'd get an electric charge out of those instruments.)

STANDINGS
Paul Pelletier ~ Hilarious
RPGDL ~ Needs to get the head out of the gutter
Marvel Comics Writing Staff ~ -4 pts

Today's contest features 100% more Lilandra

(click for big)

(Art originally from Uncanny X-men #484. Pencils are Billy Tan's.)

LILANDRA (1, 2):
CORSAIR:

Ryogo · « **Reply #13 on:** March 17, 2008, 01:21:25 PM »

I love how every last one of those entries thought sex toy. Hurrah for slightly different, but still perverted minds!

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #14 on:** March 21, 2008, 09:45:12 AM »

Today's winner is....
Zenthor!

Something about casually insulting the Empress of the greater part of the galaxy because her species' head looks like a reproductive organ of your species just strikes my fancy. Like, Corsair totally doesn't have to give a fuck about miss high-and-mighty bird lady, because her head looks like his dick. Also, the dialog fits really nicely in the bubbles.

Dick and Fart jokes won't always win. Probably.

Other submissions!
Cmdr King:
"Argh, my head is splitting!"
"Why does my species reproduce through energy eggs"
"They still ain't mine" (Fourth, fifth, sixth, and seventh Summers brothers?!)

DjinnAndTonic
"CHRISSAKES-My head hurts!"
"Just how much caffeine is in this shit?"
"Yeah, sure, blame the electric tea for your hang-over. THAT'LL distract me from your obvious drinking problem..."

DomaDragoon
"You are by far the most infuriating human I have ever met."
"I can certainly see where Scott gets it from."
"Shut up and drink your damn floating tea."
~Bonus points for FFVII reference and knowing who the fuck Corsair is.

New contest in a few minutes.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #15 on:** March 21, 2008, 09:58:28 AM »

Actual dialog:
"D'ken has the High Council on his side... he's already been proclaimed Emperor."
"If we're to have any hope of taking back my throne, we're going to need a man like Ka'ardum."
"But he'll never join us."
~Ed Brubaker

FACT: Shi'ar have stupid names. (Sh'iar? I don't even know anymore.)

STANDINGS?!:
Zenthor: 5 pts
Doma Dragoon: 2 pts
Ryan Stiles: 50 pts
Marvel Comics Writing Staff: -5 points

Today's contest is again from Fantastic Four #544. Paul Pelletier draws some really funny panels. This is probably my least favorite of the four panels I'm gonna use from this issue alone.

RANDOM BLACK GUY*:
THING:

*Note: Random Black Guy may actually be Deathlok

Sierra · « **Reply #16 on:** March 21, 2008, 10:33:26 AM »

Quote from: Veryslightlymad on March 21, 2008, 09:58:28 AM

FACT: Shi'ar have stupid names. (Sh'iar? I don't even know anymore.)

FACT: Established SF/fantasy traditions state that presence of unnecessary apostrophes = exotic and alien. Yes, it's stupid.

Captain K. · « **Reply #17 on:** March 21, 2008, 01:37:40 PM »

That does look like Michael Collins. Did he finally get his brain out of the Deathlok cyborg?

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #18 on:** March 21, 2008, 03:38:16 PM »

Yes it is, and yes he did. Apparently. I dunno how. Thing was kind of shocked to see him. He was all "Weren't you a cyborg?"

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #19 on:** March 22, 2008, 10:39:47 AM »

Great turnout this time, as only Paul Pelletier can bring out.

Today's winner is.....

CAPTAIN K!

It's funny because it's so, so true.

Other submissions:

El Cideon:
"The future's so bright, I gotta wear shades."
"Gotcha. Romantic mood lighting, coming right up!"

Cmdr_King:
"I'll never forget... *tear*"
"Your MOM never forgot! Last night! BAM!"
~Note: I can see Thing doing this, but maybe not to poor Micheal.

Grefter:
"Game over, man!"
"I SAID BITCH BE COOL!"
~This is referencing two different movies, non?

Ryogo:
"I'm sorry Ben... It's your baby..."
"Come on! Like, SERIOUSLY?!! Are you writers THAT drained for ideas that I have to knock up another guy?!!"
~Not yet, anyhow. Give 'em a few months.

New contest in a few minutes.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #20 on:** March 22, 2008, 10:51:58 AM »

Actual dialog:
"I've never been to his house" (referring to the Watcher. Yes, the Watcher will appear next time.)
"That's about to change. Don't worry your whiskers T'Charlie, we all know the plan."
~Dwayne McDuffie

STANDINGS (Don't try and figure these out. There are no rules to the standings. This is an oddly logical day, all things considered):
Captain K ~ 5 pts
Zenny ~ 4 pts
DomaDragoon ~ 1 pt
Grefter ~ References movies
Marvel Comics Writing Staff ~ -6 pts

And now, Deathbird:

DEATHBIRD 1:
DEATHBIRD 2:

(Both bubbles are the girl's.)
Art originally from Uncanny X-men #493. Art by Clayton Henry)
If you're wondering why these are from issues so close to each other, I just grab a comic from the closest box 'o comics, so they happen to be from the same general time period. Hurrah, hurrah.

Cotigo · « **Reply #21 on:** March 30, 2008, 03:40:29 AM »

*Ahem.*

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #22 on:** March 30, 2008, 03:58:10 AM »

I know. I'm fried and having some difficulty with my scanner. I'll update tomorrow.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #23 on:** March 30, 2008, 05:07:10 AM »

You know what? Fuck it, man, I lied. Update RIGHT THE FUCK NOW.

This week(sorry. Better next time)'s winner is.......

MAD FNORDER

Why?

ACTUAL FOLLOWING PANEL

Other submissions:

Zenthor ~ "SQUAWK! SQUAWK! Bock bock bock..." "B'CAWK!"

CMDR_King graciously submitted one seconds before I updated, hoping to make me do it earlier. It worked.
"SAY IT BITCH!" "SAY MY NAME!"

And that's it. Three submissions. Deathbird is not popular, and I don't update enough.

Veryslightlymad · « **Reply #24 on:** March 30, 2008, 05:18:12 AM »

Actual Dialog:
"You think I don't know how it feels to yearn for vengeance?"
"Haven't you learned anything of me at all?"
~Ed Brubaker

NEW AND IMPROVED STANDINGS
Mad Fnorder ~ 5 pts
Zenthor ~ 4 pts
CMDR_King ~ 1 pt for moxie
Veryslightlymad ~ -3 pts for not updating enough
Marvel Comics Writing Staff ~ -7 pts

So, like, I need an idea about what could maybe revive this topic and get people interested. And then it hit me. I thought, "This topic needs more Paul Pelletier. And you know what else it needs? The mother-fucking Watcher. If only there was some way I co-----... OH MY GOD"

And thus, this panel, from the classic Fantastic Four #544 made its way into the Contest.

UATU, THE WATCHER:
BLACK PANTHER

News:

Author Topic: Son of Caption Contest (Possible eventual table breaking) (Read 5661 times)

Taishyr