Good Morning 2011: Wherein the emo comes to roost

[Idun]

Man, that's always how it goes. I found this awesome bar just before I left Japan, too.

And y'know... now I'll prolly never see it again. 

]:  We could always have a pity drunk party. (For some odd reason, I'm now thinking of the time I smuggled vodka from Egypt)..

[metroid composite]

I just had *THE* best motherfucking god damn motherfucking margaritas in my entire fucking god damned life.

HOLY fucking shit. The place I picked for my going away dinner is FUCKING FUCKING awesome, fucking shit. MMMMMMM. The peachtree margarita is so fucking good. Fucking hell.

Wait, hold on, you're still in Atlanta?  I thought you were already gone!

We should get together again before you go!

[Idun]

OK! (: It would be best to chill at your place unless you're still unpacking? And in that case, if you are, I want to help you unpack, since you never really unpacked the last two years you've been here. (Two, now?)

[metroid composite]

OK! (: It would be best to chill at your place unless you're still unpacking? And in that case, if you are, I want to help you unpack, since you never really unpacked the last two years you've been here. (Two, now?)

One and a half, and umm...I've halted my unpacking, but that doesn't actually mean I'm completely unpacked; I'm totally not. >_>

[Idun]

Well. Once I figure out a way on how to get there, I'll text you. I have no wheels anymore.

[metroid composite]

Well. Once I figure out a way on how to get there, I'll text you. I have no wheels anymore.

I can always come to you, too.  You could show me malls closer to where you live; undoubtedly such malls would be better than the terrible selections where I live, and I actually need to go on a shopping spree for clothes, because my San Francisco collection has been worn so much it's developing holes....

[Idun]

OK. OK. I've read this post twice now. Despite my deep, deep antipathy to having people visit my house (or even drive by to pick me up), I shall text you my address. There's a discount shopping plaza a few minutes South from I-75 we could visit. After 1PM tomorrow, I'm completely free until Saturday when I load the truck up to leave.

[Idun]

My last day of work was awesome! (:

[metroid composite]

Yay!

[Lady Door]

Company is still in "throw the papers in the air and see where they land" mode.

I still know nothing about my future job/salary, except that I'm probably going to have one for the next 6 months at least, probably longer.

We had Meetings wherein half the company remaining said, "Let's do these cool things!" and the other half said, "I like the old things we did, let's do them again but different!"

Now I am working with the COO to boil those things down into a single coherent strategy map, complete with actionable items. The COO's directive was, "here's a map, here's how another company did it, here's the list of stuff you and I agreed was said, and a few more things we added - now put it together in a comprehensive PowerPoint presentation, complete with estimated investments." To which I said, "Uh. Okay?" because honestly, what else do you say when the COO asks you to write up the strategy plan for the new old company?

Other than "I could use a raise."

[DjinnAndTonic]

Totally should have gone with "Sounds boring, you do it."

[Jo'ou Ranbu]

Company is still in "throw the papers in the air and see where they land" mode.

I still know nothing about my future job/salary, except that I'm probably going to have one for the next 6 months at least, probably longer.

We had Meetings wherein half the company remaining said, "Let's do these cool things!" and the other half said, "I like the old things we did, let's do them again but different!"

Now I am working with the COO to boil those things down into a single coherent strategy map, complete with actionable items. The COO's directive was, "here's a map, here's how another company did it, here's the list of stuff you and I agreed was said, and a few more things we added - now put it together in a comprehensive PowerPoint presentation, complete with estimated investments." To which I said, "Uh. Okay?" because honestly, what else do you say when the COO asks you to write up the strategy plan for the new old company?

Other than "I could use a raise."

It softens my neurosis to know there's someone else in a completely insane job situation, even if it's in a completely different direction.

EDIT: We're still friends even if I vicariously feed off your grief, right?

[NotMiki]

"I could use a raise."

That's what you say right AFTER the presentation.

[Cotigo]

single coherent strategy map
actionable items
directive
estimated investments."
strategy plan

I hate you.

[NotMiki]

White-collar responsibility, your natural enemy!

[Anthony Edward Stark]

The plan, by the way, worked out, Zenny.

[Cotigo]

Jim:  Tell me the phrase "strategy plan" doesn't make you want to punch a kitten.  I fuckin' dare you. 

Rob: Told you.

[NotMiki]

Jim:  Tell me the phrase "strategy plan" doesn't make you want to punch a kitten.  I fuckin' dare you. 

Rob: Told you.

Dude, a few thousand judicial opinions later and I've developed an immunity to needlessly repetitive verbiage.

[Grefter]

I don't care what business you speak any more.  If you work in a corporation and can fill out a fucking form properly then I love you.

[Lady Door]

The COO was a finance guy from the Netherlands before he came to our company. I have to switch to an entirely different language when I talk to him and it ain't Dutch. Also, as was explained to me, a strategy plan is not redundant, it's needlessly bureaucratic: we really are planning a strategy and strategizing a plan, which is itself enough to make me want to punch babies, kittens, and all manner of cute young creatures.

Other words and phrases that have come up repeatedly: engage our audience; 2.0; deliverables; drill down; going forward; boil the ocean; "who will own this task?";

Corporate speech is a bitch, and its infiltration into our marketing (re: you can't release that until you add X language) is why we suck so hard as a company.

[OblivionKnight]

I really haven't posted for a while, have I?

The most interesting thing that happened that I am legally able to talk about was last weekend when there were nasty storms in Pittsburgh.  There was flooding, and several people actually died (a woman and kids in a car that got submerged).  I was driving around there and found a 6 week old kitten on the side of the street.  Sooooooooo adorable.  It's mommy and siblings were probably taken away in the storm.  I took it to Pet Smart to get examined.  I decided I would definitely keep it, since it really was so cute.  I told them I'd be back the next day (it was like 1400 when I dropped it off and I had to be in Morgantown at 1600 for something, and they closed at 1500).  I call them the next morning before they open to check up on it, and they told me they adopted it out already.  Needless to say, I am sad and angry 


This has been an insane 3+ weeks otherwise. 

I've got 5 new lectures to prepare that are brand new, so I have to come up with them in their entirety, all for the Fall Semester.

I've been working on and submitted 2 grants.

I've also had to develop 3 new labs in addition to the lectures, for the Fall Semester.

I've got Spring Semester stuff to work on (an entire class I'm coordinating, with simulation labs!) as well

Five other ongoing research projects/reports (1 submitted and re-editing, 3 ongoing with +/- student/resident involvement, 1 I'm prepping Friday with a student)

It's been busy.  Walking the 2 miles to work at 0530 each morning since we're rounding earlier because our patient load is insane for the summer (17+ average?  really?  Usually it's around 10 in the summer), then staying in for a while to late to finish stuff.  It's fun, but man, I am looking forward to the weekend.

On the plus side, 1 year in, I have a meritorious raise of 4%.  Pretty awesome. 

[Lady Door]

It at least sounds like you get something - enjoyment, fulfillment, money, an excuse to play with drugs, messing with young people's minds - from your work, which is awesome even if it is ridiculously busy.

And WHAT IS IT with adoption agencies doing that?! I had the same experience with a dog I wanted to adopt way back when. >:|

[Anthony Edward Stark]

Rob: Told you.

The trick to working it out was:

1- Get liquored up together.

2- "Take the #69 train to Humpsville station."

[Idun]

That's where you've been, OK. Cool beans.

): LadyDoor.

(: another date with MC that ended in a bag (Girl, I'm *almost* done with it) of tortilla chips from a cutiepatootie at the taco place I frequent too much.

[Grefter]

Dizzy as fuck, have been all week, was off work Monday, off work again today.  Fly out to Melbourne for work on Sunday.  I hope it stops.

Hate this, when I was exercising regularly this wasn't happening, can't exercise while dizzy, so can't do much to make it go away until it decides to stop.  Frustrating.