4. God Hand (PlayStation 2, Capcom/Clover 2006)
What is it about 3D action games that seems to draw them on towards silly humour? I guess because Devil May Cry did it, so does everyone else. God Hand probably does it better than any other writing-light game I've seen, which of course is why it's the top 3D action game of the year to me. Clearly.
Of course, for Gene's zany adventures through a vaguely-defined, demon-infested world, the silly humour and style is only the beginning. It's certainly a solid enough beginning, though; from dragon kicking enemies into the milky way while surfer music plays in the background, to saving an innocent villager from a POISON CHIHUAHUA, to the utterly deranged relationship between Gene and Olivia, to the indescribable yet perfect ending theme song, the game is a riot whenever it stops to actually have cutscenes, which, it must be noted, never last too long or in any way interfere with the game experience. Unlike with DMC3 there's little falling off in the humour's pace as the game goes on; the third to last boss is a blaxploitation reject named AFRO FIST, Gene's reward for beating the final boss is to be chased by an axe-wielding maniac, and of course there's the aforementioned ending vocal itself. Great stuff.
Ultimately, of course, I wouldn't be able to sing these praises so highly if the game didn't deliver in other respects. Fortunately, deliver it does. The game provides a demanding, surprisingly deep, and downright fun game experience. Gene has a large array of abilities available, but fortunately the game's delightful setup screen lets you easily evaluate which abilities do what (even down to precise damage) so you can make informed decisions in how to set him up. The different attacks have very different properties leading to clear variations in when they are useful, and correctly applying them, along with the game's three or four evasive maneuvers, with precision timing in response to various enemy threats, provides all sorts of addictive and challenging combat. Unlike many other games in the genre, how you fight varies a great deal depending on how many enemies you have to deal with at once, partially because Gene's singletarget lockdown moves tend not to coincide with his best crowd control, and partially because fighting multiple enemies at once is actually as legitimately dangerous as it deserves to be, and needs to be approached carefully. Of course, much like DMC before it, God Hand provides you with a bailout super-buff (as well as the orb-costing super-moves, which are similarly limited), and while these lack the versatile defensive uses of Devil Trigger, they make up for it by providing varied methods of (powerful) offence.
As with DMC, God Hand succeeds brilliantly in making me care about the randoms; certain tough sets of mooks are often even more dangerous than any boss, due to the aforementioned strength in numbers enemies can claim. This isn't to say the bosses aren't respectable, though, as well as generally quite well-designed. I wouldn't put them quite on DMC's level, but they aren't too far off, and there are a lot of them, and they're fun. The game also has oodles of what amount to optional boss fights in the arena, and while some are more fun than others, they're at worst a nice diversion.
Perhaps a particular aspect of God Hand that deserves the most hype, though, is its sliding challenge. Doing well in God Hand causes the difficulty level to rise; doing poorly causes it to fall (although, of course, even the lowest level is still respectable). This brilliant mechanic pays off in ways both expected and unexpected. Obviously, it keeps the challenge of the game at a demanding level no matter what your ability at the game, so you'll never snooze through the game yet you're unlikely to get too badly walled by any one fight (not that some deaths aren't to be expected). But perhaps more than that, it makes trying to keep the difficulty level high a point of pride; it's essentially a scoring system (based on perfectly understandable criteria of "do well" in terms of hitting and not being hit, instead of a set of totally arbitrary ratings) but one that gives tangible and meaningful feedback to the player. As someone who is modestly fond of scoring systems in games regardless, this extra step was something I definitely dug.
There's less and less negative to say about the games at this point. Visually the game often isn't terribly impressive, to the degree that even I kinda noticed it and I usually don't, but this doesn't really interfere with the game in any meaningful way. The use of button-mashing "pummel" techniques is kinda annoying and gets even physically tiring after a while. And the game is a bit random at points; a demon showing up at a bad time can ruin your day. However, ultimately, these are all fairly minor complaints. God Hand is, in general, just an awesome experience and certainly one of the games I had most fun playing with year; the only reason it's not higher is that the games above it consumed more of my life in various ways.
The good: Great combat; great character setup; great sense of style
The bad: Some minor graphical concerns; button-mashing gets annoying
The ugly: No, Japan, we reaaally didn't need the pummel command against female enemies to turn into a spank command
