Results
49. Buffy Summers v Burrich, Farseer Trilogy - Breakfast /IIII
50. Lord Zedd v R2-D2 - Spelling Bee III/IIII
51. Chocobo v Hong Meiling - Decathalon IIIII II/I
52. Ryusei Date v Belcoot - Getting Rich Quick I/IIIII II
53. Jack Frost v Woodstock - Mantracking IIIII/IIII
54. TimeLord v Antenora, WA2 - Plane Crashing I/IIIII I
55. Alucard, Castlevania v Jareth, King of the Goblins - Fashion Makeovering III/IIIII
56. Gary Oak v Odin - Hiding Easter Eggs IIII/IIIII
Pool H
Match 57
It's amazing what kinds of things people can find to be competitive about. Blogging is inane, but still frighteningly easy to tally a winner as you simply see which blog gets more hits. And this time we have some real personalities going at it.
Darth Vader may be a dark lord of the Sith, but that doesn't mean he can't open up and spill his thoughts and feelings on the interweb. After all, he's got his own blog at
http://darthside.blogspot.com/ where he spills his thoughts and feelings. Or at least did. Hope his plan to introduce his kid to his boss worked out well for him.
Against the well written and fairly serious sith lord, we have someone who is everything he is not. A buffoon to his intelligence, a fool to his menace, an incompetant to his skill, and a jack of all traces to his mastery of one. But despite all that, his life story has captivated people for over a decade and a half. That's right, Simpson, Homer Simpson, the greatest guy in history! From the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a chestnut tree!
Match 58
If it exists, there's bound to be at least one person who excels at it. But what about things that don't exist yet? In this case, we've got a competition where our two contestants will face off against each other in a sport that doesn't even exist yet. We don't know exactly what this sport will involve, but I'm assured it'll be wacky, exciting, and possibly even a bit insane.
These are horrible attributes to be applying to a Dwarf, whose efforts are rarely involved in things that don't exist yet, traditionally focussing on things that don't exist anymore. But Gimli, son of Gloin, is game for doing things which no Dwarf has done before, like going on a long travel expedition with an elf, and teaching his bretheren that it isn't gay if it's with an elf. This kind of broad thinking should be just enough to let him manage with the ancient dwarven tradition of hitting it with an axe until he wins. Which may not work by the rules, but probably works by the ratings.
Of course, his opponent is the epitome of wacking, exciting, and possibly a little bit insane. Also, since she doesn't exist yet either, this may be all the leg up Excellen Browning needs in order to take the day.
Match 59
Jogurts, though individually weak, they breed quickly, until their 1337 numbers can even overcome twinks. Against these hordes, lone men are 'volunteered' to herd them, getting them across the great plains in time for market. This is their story.
If any man is an expert at being resigned to suicide missions and somehow surviving them all the same, Sahz is that man. With his trusty Frocobo at his side, and a legion of snarky passive-aggressive comments on his lips, there's nothing that will make Sahz give up.
But he's up against the cool confidence and crack shot of Revolver Ocelot. And while Sahz is less likely to purposefully kill his Jogurts, Ocelot is likely to make any, dissappearances, count.
Match 60
Alright, I'll keep this short because I don't know anything about one of the competitors. However, the competition is pillow fighting. But the best part is, on one side you've got the EO3 bartender, some chick name of Missy. On the other hand, you better bow down pansies, because Kornell and his killer swing are taking to the field. But in this silly contest, will the glory be all his?
Match 61
Dog Grooming, the art of taking a smelling unkempt mutt and making it look like a pedigree hound.
First up we have the illustrious Sherlock Holmes, who is a master of everything he thinks worth doing, and utterly ignorant of anything he deems beneath him. Which is dog grooming?
Next up is Ike, leader of the Greil Mercenaries. Who... has never had a dog, but it may be a skill he'd know. Also, who knows if he's ever gotten into Laguz grooming, a skill that's almost certainly transferable.
Match 62
This is the way! Two adventurers will head out with faith. There they will do the job they are given! They'll try their very best and... who will have a good feeling?
Arche likes Tigers! But not Elves! But is her Magic a match for legendary dynasty warrior Guan Ping?
Match 63
Basket Weaving is kinda the injoke of this tourney. After all, why else would it be back, and with a subaquatic element to boot? Doesn't change that it's still in demand.
First up is one of the first, and memorable, NPCs ever. That guy at the town entrance who welcomes you to Coneria at the start of FF1. Given how he has a lot of time spent just sitting there, odds are he's probably got some hobbies, and who knows if Basket Weaving is one of them.
Against him is the unstoppable merchant Taloon, who has sold more stuff than any other RPG Merchant. Of course, just because he's an ace at buying and selling doesn't mean he has any skill at actually making stuff.
Match 64
And so we end Round 1 with one of the greatest events to exist in this competition. Puppy Kicking. As before, the event is simple. Total Yardage over a period of time is all that counts, meaning that the power of your kick may not matter if the other guy is better at getting his puppy to return to him so he can get more kicks in.
First up is our trapped man, the Admiral Ackbar. He likely isn't going to be any great shakes at power, but as a high ranking admiral he's probably got it in him to actually do the kicking. And since he seems to be some kind of squid alien, he might even be delicious enough to dogs that they'll be willing to keep coming back, which is his best shot considering...
That he's up against M Bison, the insane criminal overlord with the super human street fighting powers. This is one foe who'll be hard to outpower. Just, it's hard to imagine that this guy will be able to coax the puppies even if he doesn't psychocrusher the little balls of fluff. That said, for him, just terrorizing them enough that they don't run may be all the advantage the floating bastard needs.
57. Darth Vader v Homer SImpson - Competitive Blogging
58. Gimli, Son of Gloin v Excellen Browning - Excelling at Sports That Don't Even Exist Yet
59. Sahz, FF13 v Revolver Ocelot - Jogurt Herding
60. Kornell v Missy the Bartender, EO3 - Pillow Fight
61. Sherlock Holmes v Ike - Dog Grooming
62. Arche Klein, ToP v Guan Ping - Propositioning (FFT Style)
63. Welcome to Coneria Guard v Taloon - Basket Weaving
64. Admiral Ackbar v M. Bison - Puppy Kicking