What games are you playing 2014?

[Fudozukushi]

Dark Souls 2:  Started.  Deprived/No Gift/Not using the DLC items because this is Frue Dark Souls.  I smash things like Hulk with my unbeatable two-handed fist technique.

Highlight so far:  crawled into a coffin and grew breasts.

So that's how I suddenly became a woman!

You're on track to get the ring reward for no deaths in a playthrough!

Are you kidding. That's a real thing? I did die to dogs in Limbo once pre-chargen, so that's probably already out. The important thing for my priorities was that I haven't died while human (because that means I still have full max HP goddammit people why did you have to pull this punitive crap again again).

There's also a ring for not using bonfires~  I mean, both of these are third-hand information but it's so DARK SOULS it might be true.

I dumped half of my reward on the Fall Control ring (falling damage is really a thing in this game). Fudo, I'm just going to go ahead and ask rather than perform the experiment myself: know if this makes jumping down the pit in Majula safe?

Yeah, just did it myself recently.  Now, is whatever's in the pit safe?  That's for you to discover Mwahahahahaha.

I'm sure that can't end badly considering I almost died to the pigs hanging around the pit when I first arrived in Majula. (Not badass mecha boar, you guys. Regular runty little piglets. That is how bad dagger and starting explorer stats are).

Oh no, those pigs are deadly for anyone!  They have like, 700 HP.

[AndrewRogue]

I'm sure that can't end badly considering I almost died to the pigs hanging around the pit when I first arrived in Majula. (Not badass mecha boar, you guys. Regular runty little piglets. That is how bad dagger and starting explorer stats are).

Were still a threat after leveling and while using a bastard sword.

Those baby pigs are just straight up dangerous.

Dark Souls 2: Pursuer was a mother fucker and took me a fair few more tries than it should have. First few deaths were adjusting to the roll changes fully (which is to say making sure I rolled towards his shield when he attacked). After that it was just a matter of not getting clipped. The windows to heal in that fight are fairly narrow and a little hard to predict.

Up to the Ruin Sentinels who are proving to be absolute mother fuckers as well. Top platform is so goddamn narrow. Fighting two of them at once is awful. They do so much damage. Etc.

That said, if you'd just waited, Cid, the first one will jump back up on the platform. Also smash you with its warhammer while doing so.

I kinda feel like I must have options for other places to go and I'm just being really stupid about missing a path somewhere. Oh well. Wandered back around the Forest of the Giants and discovered Soldier's Rest. Kinda spinning my wheels to level/find some more gear.

[Sierra]

Boss durability seems to increase most dramatically with multiple players involved. Like I did twice the damage vs Sentinels with regular rapier pokes solo then I did supporting other people as a phantom.

What is Soldier's Rest even for? I stopped in there and didn't see any obvious exits so just warped back out. What in the hell putting a bonfire someplace where you'll get instantly jacked by multiple Jim Henson's Havel Babies just walking out the door.

Leadup to the boss in Sinner's Rise looked fucking awful from what I saw as a summon last night, kinda inclined to poke around for somewhere else to explore. I'm also gonna head back to Limbo and see what I can get out of Snuggly since this ore scarcity crap is seriously pissing me off. Want to experiment with other weapons--SMAAASH worked really well in Demon's Souls the one time I played it and this is basically Demon's Souls 2 so maybe I want to give greatswords a try--but there's no point because I already know they'll do less damage than what I have just by virtue of being unupgraded (and unable to be upgraded because of artificial resource scarcity). It makes experimentation impractical, which is just a dumb design decision in pretty much any context.

I must say, though, that the rapidity of chained bowfire is most gratifying. Wonder how archer mode would work out, I should go upgrade my bow OH GOD DAMMIT

[Fudozukushi]

Not just boss health but their defenses as well.  Split damage weapons will do like, half the damage to a phantomed boss.

Still haven't found a unlimited purchasable source of Titanite Shards and they've stopped popping up in the "world" as well.  Don't think I ever saw them drop from enemies either.

Sinner's Rise is awful(SHOCK!) but it has nothing on what's below.

Dark Souls 2: Two more bosses done.  Like I suspected, the returning OST boss was one of them, and the second boss I'd actually call good.  Followed by the third in Grave of Saints!  Then the boss in Black Gulch reminded me what pure bullshit is.  All-or-nothing!  10,000 health against 300 damage a swing!  Fuck you dad!  Most tedious goddamn run over in any boss in any of the three games god dammit.  Not even counting the Valley of Defilement 3.0/Blighttown 2.0 before Black Gulch.

[AndrewRogue]

What is Soldier's Rest even for? I stopped in there and didn't see any obvious exits so just warped back out. What in the hell putting a bonfire someplace where you'll get instantly jacked by multiple Jim Henson's Havel Babies just walking out the door.

In the room next to the bonfire is a dead giant tree thing that can be interacted with. What you can do with it, I'm unsure (all it did was tell me that it was once a giant or something like that), but I assume something can be done with it.

While I'm asking though. Is there another path I can follow, or do I need to go Forest of Giants -> Lost Bastille?

Also is there a source of Effigies/humanization somewhere?

[Fenrir]

FF7 Hard: Cosmo Canyon and Cloud+Yuffie already have their L3. No grinding but I had to backtrack in two dungeons due to a lack of tents. Yep.
Gi Nattak's pretty cool with this patch.

Yuffie is the best. She's all "This place sucks. When are we going to find new materias?" all the time while everybody else is brooding, and I can't find myself ever disagreeing with her.

The game's explanations for having only 3 characters in the team all the time are getting flimsier by the minute and it's pretty charming. "Huuuh there are roughly only three places in this room? Bring three people"
Bungenhagen basically just said "Cloud, could you accompany Nanaki to that dangerous place I want to show you. Also bring one other person I guess?"

I named Red 13 Nanaki, making the game more surreal than it already is. "Nanaki is Nanaki??"
If I ever replay FF8 or something I PROMISE I'll call every character "Malkovich".


I'll disagree with everybody:
I vaguely remembered disliking FF7's music and can now say it's downright unpleasant. (Boss music excluded) And not the good kind of unpleasant.
I'm pretty sure the entire soundtrack sounds to me just like Honeybee Manor sounds to those who like it. (the soundtrack) Basically, going back to these early-PSX-only-horn-things is not unlike going back to these early-PSX-only-polygonal characters. (Without the charm)
The world map theme is the worst since there's that piano on top of the PSX instruments.

So guys I know nothing about playing music. How do you call those piano double-notes that are all over the FF7 world map theme and Gwyn's theme in Dark Souls? I feel these exist to add some poignancy but have the opposite effect on me.

[Fudozukushi]

What is Soldier's Rest even for? I stopped in there and didn't see any obvious exits so just warped back out. What in the hell putting a bonfire someplace where you'll get instantly jacked by multiple Jim Henson's Havel Babies just walking out the door.

In the room next to the bonfire is a dead giant tree thing that can be interacted with. What you can do with it, I'm unsure (all it did was tell me that it was once a giant or something like that), but I assume something can be done with it.

While I'm asking though. Is there another path I can follow, or do I need to go Forest of Giants -> Lost Bastille?

Also is there a source of Effigies/humanization somewhere?

The other option(and the one the game wants you to follow apparently) is going to Hiede's Tower of Flame after completing the Forest.

I think I had an effigy drop from a dog in Bastille but that's it for renewable right now.

[Grefter]

I named Red 13 Nanaki, making the game more surreal than it already is. "Nanaki is Nanaki??"
If I ever replay FF8 or something I PROMISE I'll call every character "Malkovich".

Marry me <3

I'll disagree with everybody:
I vaguely remembered disliking FF7's music and can now say it's downright unpleasant. (Boss music excluded) And not the good kind of unpleasant.
I'm pretty sure the entire soundtrack sounds to me just like Honeybee Manor sounds to those who like it. (the soundtrack) Basically, going back to these early-PSX-only-horn-things is not unlike going back to these early-PSX-only-polygonal characters. (Without the charm)
The world map theme is the worst since there's that piano on top of the PSX instruments.

So guys I know nothing about playing music. How do you call those piano double-notes that are all over the FF7 world map theme and Gwyn's theme in Dark Souls? I feel these exist to add some poignancy but have the opposite effect on me.

You aren't wrong on the instrumentation in FF7 OST grating as fuck.  All those horns because 16 Bit era let them use a bunch more instruments.  Unfortunately it uses Midi quality music so the instrument choices are still not a huge pool and the ones that they can pick are fucking shite.  FF7 music is significantly improved with a full orchestra (like FFX is better the same or on the Piano album).

I forget the FF7 world map theme and don't have Dark Souls stuff.  If you are talking two notes played at the same time that would be a chord.  If it is two notes in quick succession that are short and sharp it is staccato or is just a shorter note of some kind.

Don't get too wrapped up in specific terminology though.  "Sounds like" is normally good enough (if people know the source obviously...)

[Meeplelard]

Amusing thing about Elfboy's write up is I REALLY didn't remember Stone's character AT ALL.  Like, I can't even picture the guy in my head or remember anything the dude did.

[Sierra]

What is Soldier's Rest even for? I stopped in there and didn't see any obvious exits so just warped back out. What in the hell putting a bonfire someplace where you'll get instantly jacked by multiple Jim Henson's Havel Babies just walking out the door.

In the room next to the bonfire is a dead giant tree thing that can be interacted with. What you can do with it, I'm unsure (all it did was tell me that it was once a giant or something like that), but I assume something can be done with it.

While I'm asking though. Is there another path I can follow, or do I need to go Forest of Giants -> Lost Bastille?

Also is there a source of Effigies/humanization somewhere?

I'm pretty sure one of the starting gifts was like seed of giant tree or something like that? Guessing this is what's needed there. That's not the first time a tree has had an interaction point I couldn't do anything with (there was one nearby white soapstone guy, too, in the branch just before the first Havel baby). My starting gift turned out to be a petrified dragon bone, thanks birdbrains. Also picked up my original bloodstain from dog mauling while I was down there. Sixty souls, woohoo!

Heide's Tower of Flame is a thing, yes. It's a branch off of Majula. Down that descending stairway, poke around the dead end until you find a pull-chain on the wall. Opens up a new area. If you've been spending time in the Bastile and level grinding, Heide's should be cake by now. It seemed pretty clearly to have been statted out for a lower level player than I am by now.

Speaking of, that's what I did today. O-man's seen better days, and I can only presume his neighbor was Effortless Trash (I took no damage against the latter). Then it was time for PIRATES. I would also recommend poking around down there, Andy, found my first proper greatsword. It is behind the most heinous ambush I have seen all game however. Johnny Longhands is sick of all the jokes about his gigantic hand, the first such incident occurred in 1976 when--okay that's pretty squarely my least favorite enemy in the game so far. They blend into the scenery so well. Extremely glad I packed a bow and tossed my last shards to upgrade it to +3, snipers everywhere and I'm getting a lot of mileage out of even close-range shooting now.

Good loot down there, got a nifty halberd (that is currently too heavy for my build) and an estus upgrade (proper +1 boost, not shard). Also a sorcery trainer if that's your thing. No Man's Wharf is the longest run I've seen without a bonfire though, and even the shortcut is after a whole lot of work. And poison is fucking brutal now you guys. I'm not even properly sure how to move on from the area. There's a deadend pier with a ship at the tail end of the place, and I can only presume this links up to the one at the bottom of the Bastile (I have assisted hosts that were clearly ascending from the base instead of starting from the Sentinels and moving down) but I see no way to activate it. Weird.

Anyway, I should have stopped for the night right there, but feeling all smug after making it human through repeated Johnny Longhands ambushes with a clean bill of health, I recalled there was a bit by the second forest bonfire I hadn't cleared. Jump across gap, get item, descend, oh hey it's a cave. So that's where the salamander lives! Experiment a little, think I've found a spot where I can shoot him but the fireballs will impact the ceiling, set down roots and start firing. Then he decides that in fact he can hit me there, and proceeds to do so four times. I figured after all this time the first proper death would be a stupid one. And after all that there was just a stupid firesword in there!

Effigies are indeed in perilously short supply. My brother informs me that completing tasks for hosts can make you human again, but after just now clearing the Sentinels twice in phantom mode and remaining undead, I am not in a position to confirm this. I dunno, maybe small soapstone tasks? I've not actually used that one yet. Re: Sentinels, incidentally, turns out there's an NPC phantom in one of the cells outside the fog gate. Sorcerer with what appears to be Soul Spear, rips them apart pretty badly if you can keep the heat off her.

I am actually enjoying the game in spite of all my bitching. I'm not near as impressed as I wanted to be and the regressive design elements remain regrettable. But you know, me and exploring. That's enough to keep me going.

Anywho, it's either Sinner's Rise or the pit for me next. I will say...the pit, since I'm not even able to unlock the bonfire just outside of Sinner's Rise yet and fuuuuck explodyface curse zombies. Also, ridiculous double-sword acquired. So that's a thing.

EDIT: anybody know what having your messages rated does for you, if anything? This one ambush message I dropped in the Bastile has been rated like thirty times today and the notification freaks me out every time. I'm used to there being an invader or something when a message pops up like that! (Have not been invaded at all yet, thankfully. And unsurprisingly since likely the Darkwraith analogue hasn't been broadly discovered yet.)

[AndrewRogue]

Oh wow. I had been down there a few times and just missed the chain every time.

[Sierra]

Ditto. My brother pointed it out to me.

I mean to not read much about stuff I haven't encountered yet

Amazing how quickly that sentiment became obsolete.

[Fudozukushi]

DARK SOULS 2!: The Giant Tree Starting Gift is an item that makes enemies attack PVP invaders.  Apparently those giant trees spawn them?  I tried looking for any fruit hanging on its branches and found nothing.

OMG-Man and Effortless Trash are bingo.  Former's bout the only half-decent track I've heard beyond the returner.

Poison is now basiclly toxic.  Wait until later mwhahahahaha.  Anyway, at the very peak of NMW is a bell that'll bring the ship in closer for the boss fight.  The NMW link to the Bastille just leads to that gate over by MacDuff, so it's all sorts of irrelevant beyond one nifty item.

Completing a summoning seems to randomly turn you human.  Like, I initially thought it reversed Hollowing by one level but it doesn't.  I just popped back to human after helping sometimes.  Also I have 33 Effigies so... something.  I think just getting gray-phantom summoned turns straight human as well?  But I got like seven gray summons in a row so it's hard to tell.

Don't go into the pit.  It's a billion times worse than exploding zombies.  Not even kidding.

Rated messages don't seem to do anything I can tell.  Both times I stepped into gray phantom zones I got invaded so....

Anyway on a progress note, finished off the boss in Black Gulch.  Turns out the path I kept ignoring had a bonfire that dropped me right outside the door.  So those actual hours spent getting back to the door were even more wasted than usual!  Since I wasn't torturing myself with uselessness beforehand it only took three tries before I iced the bastard.  After that I got an unpetrify dudes item and used it on the dude in the Bastille.  He sells the Boss Soul weapons!  For really cheap!  And he vanished when I used the bonfire just like the miracle lady!

Ugh, whatever, Shaded Woods go.  Cool, like, four new rings out of this.  Another completely "HUH?" boss followed by some weird, weird area then then a meet and greet with the first enemies I recall dropping Titanite Shards.  Farm here later future me.  Another.... uhhh... "Boss" after that.  Then more of the joys of playing bowman.

World Death Counter Day 3: 12.7 million.  YIKES!  What the hell happened today!?

[MC50]

Bravely Default - Also playing this. Normal mode. Currently a bit into Chapter 5. Pretty happy with the difficulty. I've unlocked a lot of Norende stuff but haven't actually used any of it besides the special moves and some components, so I've just been using storebought/found equipment. Obviously no friend summons or anything either.

Current Setups

Agnes - Templar/White Mage
Tiz - Summoner/Time Mage
Ringabel - Salve Maker/Performer
Edea - Valkyrie/Pirate

Templar is a solid enough class. You can't really do much damage with it without sacrificing your defense, which is kind of the point of the class, though. (Disclaimer: Only job level 10 currently), using it with Healing Lore and a solid mind stat makes it a good bulky healer, though.

Summoner I think is underestimated. It's quite strong, and MT helps quite a bit in some fights. I wanted to abuse the Arcanist's Zero, since all of its spells MP costs end in multiples of 10, but the classes passive MP restore ruined that plan. Still not sure on a subjob. Have Time Mage for now. It's fine. Something else might work better.

Salve Maker is great. I haven't looked up a list of mixes but this game is actually nice and lets you know what the mixes will be before you confirm. Some simple ones have been very useful - Quarter Elixir is cheap and an excellent HP/MP heal, and Resurrect is a revive clone. Giving an enemy an elemental weakness helps Summoners damage, also. That's not mentioning Widen Item.  Speaking of helping summoners damage, Performer's skills are almost all useful. Kind of wish he could do some damage, though, so I might rethink things.

Valkyrie is solid enough as a main. It has a decent passive, can equip armor, and basically carries around the Pirate debuff/Double Damage skillset. I use High Jump once in a while, and Spirit Barrier has helped a fair bit when a boss is charging up something dangerous. Good physical damage.

I've dropped a few classes that I tried but I probably didn't give them a fair enough chance to really review them, at least not yet.

Find this team to be working pretty well but there is room for experimentation of course. Difficulty has been solid, no complaints. Story has been alright. Interested in seeing where it goes from now, anyway, and the journal is fun to thumb through once in a while.

[AndrewRogue]

Dark Souls 2: Wow. Heide direction is way better. Beat both bosses there. Surprise cameo boss was a surprise. Also cleared No Man's Wharf.

Bosses are weird in this game. Most of what I've fought have felt more like mini-bosses than actual  bosses. This is actually a pretty big departure from both Demon's and Dark Souls

[Sierra]

Fudo: Gray phantom, what?

I am guessing the upsurge in deaths was a wave of players less obsessive and rapid in their progress than us bashing their heads against the Sentinels. Seems to be the fight everyone loves to hate (and certainly the only one that's scared me so far).

And aw god, really? I have to climb all the way back up NMW because I overlooked a goddamn lever or something?

[Fudozukushi]

Yeah, the bosses are really lackluster.  Some of them don't even get music!  LAME.

Gray Phantoms are area-specific invader phantoms related to covenants.  Ones in the Bastille and the others in the pit.  Winning these fights gets you loot, the first one giving Titanite Chunks and the second giving out Pharos Lockstones.

Sentinels with summons are at least manageable.  Lost Sinner's stupidly giant swing's means she can still hit you even if you're behind her.

Yeah, I missed it my first time through as well.  Then so did the guy who summoned me, so I had to lead him up there too.

DARK SOULS 2: More bosses clear.  Huntsman's corpse boss was spiffy enough, so was Harvest Valley/Earthen Keep.  Harvest Valley has another vendor with 10 titanite shards for sale and enemies with a decent drop chance, go farming.  Went and upgraded my miracle chime and bow!  The promptly found a better bow with another merchant.  Harvest Valley also has 2 unpetrify items so go it.

[Sierra]

Fudo: miracle chick relocates down the stairs in Majula.

[Fudozukushi]

Fudo: miracle chick relocates down the stairs in Majula.

Yeah I know that now.  She opens the way to Hunstmans Corpse.

[Twilkitri]

Botanicula - played through

Short, kinda whimsical I suppose. Somewhat entertaining.

There were several times when there were things you could drag on-screen that the game didn't do a good job of letting me know that you could. Essentially you need to actually try to drag something to see if you can do that, whereas most things are kicked off just by clicking on them. Still didn't hold me up for more than a couple minutes, I guess.

Weren't enough sections where you got to try to use the unique abilities of each character.



Gone Home - played through

Engrossing. Can't think of any specifics to talk about.



Broken Age - played Act 1

Pretty entertaining, definitely left me interested in how all the current mysteries are going to be resolved in Act 2.

Played through Vella's side first, then Shay's. My feelings on the split are that Vella's side is more interesting than Shay's.

Are some minor issues with the dialogue trees such as the druids going over their whole spiel about the Riddle of Yorn every time you select a different reason for getting into the temple, and your dialogue to ask about the riddle being something like 'Tell me about the Riddle of Yorn again' even though they haven't told you about it before.

Art style looks pretty good in motion, I didn't think I'd care for it too much from the screenshots.

People complain about it having terribly-convenient-unusual-item syndrome, but I don't remember that actually happening outside Grabbin' Gary? There's an argument for the art piece, but that does have a reason to be in that general vicinity at least.

So, given the ending of Act 1 (really, just playing the opposite side makes it look to be shaky ground, but it's the ending that confirms it) it looks like I was successfully tricked into thinking that Alex was Shay. Presumably people who start with Shay's side are intended to be tricked into thinking that Mother is a version of Vella. There is a part of me which is expecting them to flip it over and have both turn out to be true somehow though.

There are a bunch of other questions raised, such as:
* Alex is supposedly part of Operation Dandelion the same as Shay, but he's been in cryostasis for 300 years? How long as Operation Dandelion been going, considering that Lomura was supposedly on the verge of destruction (or course 300 years may not be much on a planetary scale for verges of destruction).
* The game wants to make you think that it was Shay making Mog Chothra take the sacrifices (and the rescues he makes do match up with the sacrifices in Meriloft/Sugar Bunting/Shellmound), but at one point it's mentioned that there have been at least six or seven cycles of sacrifices - so who conducted the previous cycles?
* Are the sacrifices actually in Shay's world now, or are the two worlds actually just mirroring each other in bizarre ways?



Dominique Pamplemousse - played through

Entertaining.

Pretty short, and unfortunately the singing is a tad bad at times, but all up I think it was worth playing.

[Cmdr_King]

South Park: The Stick of Truth- fin.  I am stunned this game only got an M.  Great set pieces and solid gameplay though.  Misses a 9 I think but an easy 8.

[Sierra]

DS2: Okay, deaths start piling up now that sense of invulnerability is shattered (though maybe that's what got me killed in the first place). Lot of running around today but it didn't feel like I got much done. Hunter's Copse first! Cake most of the run. Skip the skellie caves because how in the heck do you make them stay dead in this game? Eventually wind up in front of a giant fog door that screams boss fight. "I just got this key that unlocks that third bonfire, I should go back and use that first." "Eh, how bad could this be?"

A couple minutes later: "Well, I didn't think you could make a 3-on-one boss battle wussy, but here we are." About sixty seconds later: "Oh, there are little skellies now, that could be inconvenient." Shortly thereafter: "Wait, is that...No...No! NoooOOoOoOo!" Bonewheel mob, so much scarier than anything new they could cook up. I came back with an ally just out of sheer terror.

Visited Harvest Valley just long enough conclude that anyplace opening up with a bonfire behind a toxic pool isn't something I want to deal with right now. Bought out all the titanite shards and left. And then I promptly wasted all the titanite shards. See, I wanted something smashier than the old lightning sword (and don't want to be using a lightning weapon long-term anyway). Flip through the weapons I can currently equip, halberd looks mathematically solid. Take a few swings, yeah this seems like a viable option. Then, after upgrading it, I try the thing out in combat. Oh, the R1 is a different attack from behind a shield...and due to you lagging behind your shield just a fraction of a second longer than I'd like to after blocking an attack, I find myself doing the wussy shield poke more often than not. And even the overhead R1 is underwhelming damage compared to the tin unless you can chain it with the follow-up stab (not always situationally an option). God fucking dammit.

But hey, now I've got a pyro hand! That's something, right? I dump a few levels into attunement to give it a try since it appears to still not be stat-driven damage. It sucks anyway. Maybe I'll be able to fix that if I ever find a pyro trainer. Hopefully this time there's not a damage-boosting ring for it that's only sold by a sorcerer, because that punk won't even talk to me without me wasting a bunch of levels on INT.

So without other immediate options here I go back to Sinner's Rise and make my own boss run. The first time I try just running straight through and ignoring all of the (horrible, horrible) enemies along the way. This might have worked if I'd already opened the door at the end, but that slight hold-up means Lucatiel gets 'sploded by zombies. Stupidly, I go back to try and clear the basement area and maneuver myself off the bridge. Argh mk 1. Next time is actual boss run. Easy so long as boss is distracted! But Lucatiel dies and I can find no safe opening to hit him solo. Argh mk 2. Next time I'm genociding the basement to prevent a recurrence of argh mk. 1 and get 'sploded off the bridge when cursesplodey zombies follow me outside (they hadn't done this before).

Since I'm already hollow at this point, sick of burning effigies (how in the fuck do you have thirty+ of these, Fudo? I didn't even start needing them until today and still only had somewhere in the teens) and just seriously raging at this entire worthless zone, I say to hell with it, let's try the pit. Two more deaths for failed jumps on the way down. Think I missed a door, only took the lowest exit out and probably missed something but whatever man, crystal lizard sighted. Oh, look, now I'm climbing down rickety shantytown plank scaffolds, this...this doesn't look at all familiar...Eventually "The Gutter" flashes on the screen. Quite alone on the screen in fact because there's no ambient light down here and oh my god what is sniping me with poison. I don't realize it's the statues until later during a summon run, so I just jump blindly to evade my invisible enemies and somehow land right on a bonfire. Works for me! +1 death shortly thereafter for "Hey, is that step something I can jump to? ...No, it isn't." Almost wholly unsuccessful phantom mode makes it apparent this isn't some place I want to be right now (not as though I ever would, but poison cures why don't they exist). Valley of the Defiled + Blighttown + Tomb of the Giants, three great flavors that spell ipecac together. Running low on healing gems and want to pump up STR for LARGE CLUB abuse, so now it's grinding time.

Back to the Bastile, make some phantom runs for souls/humanity (but in fact I have not once yet seen humanity kick in from successful phantom mode). Poking through some newly-discovered secret passages, +1 death due to falling not immediately to my death but right in front of trio of dogs so just as well. Then figure hey, I got a lockstone from the pit, let's see what's next door. "Luna Belfry." Step in and immediately get invaded. Twice. "Okay, I'll go join the covenant, that'll probably keep me safe." *Invaded twice just going up a couple steps to retrieve souls after joining covenant.* Okay I can see I'll be running this zone in offline mode.

By this point I just have a list of horrible places I don't want to go.

And whoever thought it was a good idea to keep putting bonfires in immediate aggro range of multiple enemies needs to be punched in the face.

[Fudozukushi]

DS2: Okay, deaths start piling up now that sense of invulnerability is shattered (though maybe that's what got me killed in the first place). Lot of running around today but it didn't feel like I got much done. Hunter's Copse first! Cake most of the run. Skip the skellie caves because how in the heck do you make them stay dead in this game? Eventually wind up in front of a giant fog door that screams boss fight. "I just got this key that unlocks that third bonfire, I should go back and use that first." "Eh, how bad could this be?"

If you kill the magicians in the caves they'll stop respawning.  The Skeletons also drop titanite and effigies.

I also never found that third bonfire.  I am really bad at exploring in this game.

A couple minutes later: "Well, I didn't think you could make a 3-on-one boss battle wussy, but here we are." About sixty seconds later: "Oh, there are little skellies now, that could be inconvenient." Shortly thereafter: "Wait, is that...No...No! NoooOOoOoOo!" Bonewheel mob, so much scarier than anything new they could cook up. I came back with an ally just out of sheer terror.

My weapon broke during that fight!

Visited Harvest Valley just long enough conclude that anyplace opening up with a bonfire behind a toxic pool isn't something I want to deal with right now. Bought out all the titanite shards and left. And then I promptly wasted all the titanite shards. See, I wanted something smashier than the old lightning sword (and don't want to be using a lightning weapon long-term anyway). Flip through the weapons I can currently equip, halberd looks mathematically solid. Take a few swings, yeah this seems like a viable option. Then, after upgrading it, I try the thing out in combat. Oh, the R1 is a different attack from behind a shield...and due to you lagging behind your shield just a fraction of a second longer than I'd like to after blocking an attack, I find myself doing the wussy shield poke more often than not. And even the overhead R1 is underwhelming damage compared to the tin unless you can chain it with the follow-up stab (not always situationally an option). God fucking dammit.

The best part of having Faith is having the poison cure miracle.

But hey, now I've got a pyro hand! That's something, right? I dump a few levels into attunement to give it a try since it appears to still not be stat-driven damage. It sucks anyway. Maybe I'll be able to fix that if I ever find a pyro trainer. Hopefully this time there's not a damage-boosting ring for it that's only sold by a sorcerer, because that punk won't even talk to me without me wasting a bunch of levels on INT.

You'll probably be finding the pyro trainer soon.

So without other immediate options here I go back to Sinner's Rise and make my own boss run. The first time I try just running straight through and ignoring all of the (horrible, horrible) enemies along the way. This might have worked if I'd already opened the door at the end, but that slight hold-up means Lucatiel gets 'sploded by zombies. Stupidly, I go back to try and clear the basement area and maneuver myself off the bridge. Argh mk 1. Next time is actual boss run. Easy so long as boss is distracted! But Lucatiel dies and I can find no safe opening to hit him solo. Argh mk 2. Next time I'm genociding the basement to prevent a recurrence of argh mk. 1 and get 'sploded off the bridge when cursesplodey zombies follow me outside (they hadn't done this before).

I think I cleared the path to the Lost Sinner like... six times?  All for a dull boring boss fight that's apparently easier if you get a torch in and light up some places that I have no idea where. 

Since I'm already hollow at this point, sick of burning effigies (how in the fuck do you have thirty+ of these, Fudo? I didn't even start needing them until today and still only had somewhere in the teens) and just seriously raging at this entire worthless zone, I say to hell with it, let's try the pit. Two more deaths for failed jumps on the way down. Think I missed a door, only took the lowest exit out and probably missed something but whatever man, crystal lizard sighted. Oh, look, now I'm climbing down rickety shantytown plank scaffolds, this...this doesn't look at all familiar...Eventually "The Gutter" flashes on the screen. Quite alone on the screen in fact because there's no ambient light down here and oh my god what is sniping me with poison. I don't realize it's the statues until later during a summon run, so I just jump blindly to evade my invisible enemies and somehow land right on a bonfire. Works for me! +1 death shortly thereafter for "Hey, is that step something I can jump to? ...No, it isn't." Almost wholly unsuccessful phantom mode makes it apparent this isn't some place I want to be right now (not as though I ever would, but poison cures why don't they exist). Valley of the Defiled + Blighttown + Tomb of the Giants, three great flavors that spell ipecac together. Running low on healing gems and want to pump up STR for LARGE CLUB abuse, so now it's grinding time.

I think I've actually broken fifty at this point.  I never use them either and I'm somewhat further than you.  I've used like... three effigies period.  I usually manage with Ring of Binding and 75% health.  Though I've learned a fun new trick that I'm gonna try out next time I play.  If that time ever comes.

Did you go through Grave of Saints to get to the Gutter?  Because the exit from the pit I took led that way.

Poison moss can drop from those butterflies in Huntsman's Corpse.  Granted I didn't find that place until after was done down the pit so I made due with Ring/Heal/Gems/Crying.

Back to the Bastile, make some phantom runs for souls/humanity (but in fact I have not once yet seen humanity kick in from successful phantom mode). Poking through some newly-discovered secret passages, +1 death due to falling not immediately to my death but right in front of trio of dogs so just as well. Then figure hey, I got a lockstone from the pit, let's see what's next door. "Luna Belfry." Step in and immediately get invaded. Twice. "Okay, I'll go join the covenant, that'll probably keep me safe." *Invaded twice just going up a couple steps to retrieve souls after joining covenant.* Okay I can see I'll be running this zone in offline mode.

Apparently reviving to human from a summon is a bug.  The best part about the Luna Belfry is the boss is a hellish bastard so you're taking giant risks either way!  Anyway, that's the Covenant that gets you Titanite Chunks for winning so go nuts.

By this point I just have a list of horrible places I don't want to go.

And whoever thought it was a good idea to keep putting bonfires in immediate aggro range of multiple enemies needs to be punched in the face.

DARK SOULS 2!

[Sierra]

Apparently I fell right past Grave of the Saints.

[Fudozukushi]

Well good to know where that other exit down there leads at least.