Plusle: Allow me to give this review exactly the amount of effort it deserves. 2/5
Minun: Honestly these deserve lower scores on principle, but they aren't really ugly enough to justify it, unfortunately. But they are really lazy. Like, they are Pikachu, but rabbits. Well, more Pichu, but you get the idea. 2/5
Volbeat: Popped collar bug with swag. Volbeat is dumb. Like, what the fuck are those antennae? Or the human bug face with a nose. And being so fat. And the stubby useless wings. and the little arm and leg rings. I really am hating this thing the longer I look at it. And seriously, those antennae. 1/5
Illumise: I hate it a little less than Volbeat, but that's because it ain't popping its collar at me. This thing can also go in the trash. 1/5
Roselia: Uninspired. I dunno. This design is just boring and doesn't do anything for me. Well, that's not true. Not having a large leaf on the back for symmetry offends me. Otherwise... like, I feel like this thing would look better without the rose hands. They just seem doofy. The way the head spikes are presented isn't a lot better, but it is something. I dunno. Like, you compare this to something like the Tsareena line in S/M and it just feels lacking. That's what I'm looking for. it isn't a cohesive design. It is thing with rose hands and some head spikes. It does not convey "rose pokemon" to me. Still better than Volbeat. 2/5
Gulpin: :3/5
Swalot: While Gulpin is kinda cute and derpy, Swalot is just meh. The design carries at least (though why mustache instead of head feather?) outside the GIANT COLOR SHIFT THAT SO MANY POKEMON DO, but it is less cute and honestly way more ungainly looking because of height. 2/5
Carvanha: This gets a bit into some of my problems with later gen designs: mostly I feel they're kinda overdone. Like, does Carvannah need to be that many different colors on different part of its body like a paint by number? Does it need all three up and down fins and to be so jagged everywhere? Like, there's a decent design here, but it is just buried under too much that's all sorta glued together. The face deserves some credit, though. 3/5
Sharpedo: What is with water types and saying "fuck it, new animal" on evolution. Sharpedo is fine. I think it being so stubby is a bit dumb. Why not a long torpedo shark? The eye slits are a bit weird too. Also, why less toothy looking than Carvanha? Still, I can't really find the energy to hate this design. Its fine. Whatever. 3/5