Forty Winks

Juan vs Snorlax vs Laharl vs Deis
~Doma Dragoon

Forty Winks

Shinra Incorporated has decided to branch out beyond the energy and world-domination business, and has decided to open a mattress division. Of course, such an undertaking would require an excellent advertising campaign. As such, the marketing branch has put out the call for the greatest sleeper in the worlds, in order to get them to sign an endorsement deal.

Four entities have chosen to accept the call. Each of them with something to prove, each of them with their own style of rest: Juan, the narcoleptic Bujitsu teacher at Budehuc Castle; Snorlax, the oversized Pokemon; King Laharl the Terrible of the Netherworld; and the serpentine goddess Deis.

Each of them has consented to be placed (under medical supervision) within sensory deprivation chambers, where they will sleep until they can't sleep anymore. The one who stays in Dreamland longest wins the contract.

In the case of a tie, all four will be rejected and Rufus Shinra's personal choice of Teta Hyral will be used.
  • Nobody touches Juan...literally
  • Even after the competition they still can't get Snorlax off the bed
  • Laharl does his best Sleeping Beauty impression
  • Deis uses her superior magic for a longer, healthier sleep
  • Teta lucks out

MepMasta
Excuse me? Snorlax can hear freaking explosions and not wake up until his time... he wins this contest hands down.

Juan: 8
Snorlax: 13
Laharl: 12
Deis: 11
Teta: 2

Guruuvu no Akujin
Deis wins the sleeping by a landslide. Aside from apparently being immortal, a Goddess, and a master magician, she was also locked up for a rather extended period of time prior to BoFIII. She outsleeps her competition by several hundred years, but is ditched as an advertising campaign quickly due to her not being....consious.

Starphoenix das Helpoemer
Snorlax awakens when a kid plays bad music in his presence. I don't think he's going to make it.

Juan, while a sound sleeper, isn't exactly legendary at it... more like resident expert.

So basically, it's between Deis and Laharl. So who wins?

I'm going with the Devil Prince who takes a small arsenal to awaken out of his multi-year coma... errr... "nap."

El Cideon
Deis easily outsleeps the other three contestants, without even resorting to magic. Know why? If you'd just been smacked up by Wailing Soul Slash, you'd need a good long rest too.