Scientific Progress Goes Kupo!
Liz and Ard vs Mog and Umaro

~Meeplelard/mc

"Finally! My ultimate work of art is complete!" the shadowy figure yelled as lightning flashed melodramatically in the background "My supreme galactic augmentation device of which to enhance my abilities to superior levels is done! I shall finally gain the respect people so rightfully should consider giving me!" the gleeful figure exclaimed.

"Lights" the shadowy figure screamed, revealing none other than the maniacal genius Liz working on his latest creation--a device no larger than a Microscope, resembling some kind of a shrinking ray.

"Now, all the necessities of this device that I require involve an inferior intellect being to my own psyche of which would not be able to comprehend the likes of this breakthrough in science!" Decreed the brilliant scientist as he bounded off in search of an appropriate guinea pig. Granted, the first "guinea pig" that came to mind was, in fact, a hamster, but these are minor details....

WHAAM!!!

Some insolent little creature had dared to be too clumsy to jump out of the way of Liz' mad dash! Blasphemy!

"Kupo! Watch where your going, you crazy lizard! Kupo!" the clearly mentally inferior creature shouted back at him, (of all the nerve).

"Myself? It should be YOU, my infinitesimal little cream of a mammal of whom bares the limbs of mobility shared by that of a telefomin roundleaf bat, who should be keeping vigilante not unlike that of an raptor aves!"

"Kupo! You weren't even watching! Kupo! I was walking along, minding my own business, even had my Moogle Charm on so I wouldn't run into oddballs like yourself, Kupo, and suddenly, you come running out, Kupo, and bash into me! It's good I have my Snow Muffler on, Kupo, or I'd have been one flattened Moogle! KUPO!" Mog shouted back. But then the dastardly mammal noticed something on the ground "Kupo? What is this?"

"Alas! My thermo Nuclear Galactic Mega Hyper Infinitum Ultra Deluxe Super Radiant Hypnosis Augmentation Amplifier 8000! Your forepaws should be staying away from my poetical machine!" Liz shouted back

"Kupo, what does it do?"

"Oh, would you of inferior intellect like to know what my magnificent gigantic radioactive device does? Why, since you have so inconveniently have had an acquaintance with my own familiar self, it would be in my own belief that you would be the proper specimen for my experiment."

"Kupo? You want me to be a guinea pig?"

"In a method that your fuzzy scientifically lacking weakling mind could comprehend?? Precisely!"

"Kupo! Definitely Not! Kupo! I'm against animal testing, especially when that animal is me!"

"Nevertheless, you do not wish to gain the powers that could devastate the likes of divisions far above you?"

"That'd be cheating, Kupo! You're planning on cheating to win a championship, aren't you? Kupo! I'm not giving this back at all! Kupo!"

"It would appear my amorous fluff circular object equivalent has devised too much! And it would appear I am in need of assistance!" With that, Liz snapped his fingers, and a booming voice echoed a single earth-shaking word throughout the hall...

"Ard!"

"At this exact moment in time, you can choose to continue on this mortal coil by giving me back my NGMHIUDSRHAA 8000, or you can engage in violent activity with the two of us!"

"Ard Ard!!!" Ard said jumping up and down

"Puuu...I might need some help myself. Umaro!" Mog yelled. The Ground shook, as the mighty footsteps of the yeti himself appeared.

"Ugggh! Master, me ready! What want me to do?"

"Kupo! This guys a cheater! Lets stop him! Kupo!"

"Ugh!"

"So be what you will! However, realize that if I am victorious, you shall be used as my specimen for my incredible invention, which will ultimately prove me amazing! It would have been wiser for yourself to have retreated from that very spot at which you stand!"

"Ard! Ard!"

"Bring it on, Kupo!"

"Urrrr!"

And thus, a deadly duel for the future broke out just outside of Liz' world-renowned laboratory.

"Hold it!! Before we start this confrontation of our two minor factions, there is one thing I and my dumbfounded associate must do!"

The stadium screen turned red with a black silhouette of Liz and Ard. The surround sound speakers boomed the Wild ARMs 2 Boss intro theme. Once the screen had panned around the (very sexy) silhouettes of the scientists, the words "Lead Scientific Researcher (self styled) and his assistant" appeared in white, followed by the words "Liz" and "Ard".

"Alright, now we are fully prepared and shall commence in unfriendly warfare!"
  • Mog and Umaro knock some sense into the two lizards
  • Liz and Ard prove that Science is the most superior complexity there is
  • Laboratories can be veeeeery explosive places you know....

superaielman
When's the last time ANYTHING Liz has planned worked out well?


Three explosions, a roasted Ard, and a freed Mog later, we find out the grand total of successful Liz plans remains at.. 0!

Mog+Umaro: 20
Liz+Ard: 16
Lab blows up: 10

Jo'ou Ranbu
The match would be very one-sided against Mog and Umaro (c'mon, it's Liz and Ard, people. They just rock). But remember: it's Liz' laboratory. With his penchant for blowing things up, wouldn't you expect it to have a few gallons of highly sensible to motion nitroglicerine to make things go boom? On the bright side, he'll still technically win. Mog becomes a guinea pig either way... Umaro's his bonus.