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Wren (Phantasy Star 4) |
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After stopping the infamous tentacle entity Ultros' reign of terror, Wren of Kuran has one last task to perform before a Heavy championship: neuter Gilgamesh, incompetent, eight-armed henchman of X-Death and Chisato. Weapons loaded and defensive systems finely tuned, the android has little to fear: his robotic architecture halts all of the crazy cameraman's tricks. And, in a slugfest, Wren's self-recovery systems will keep him alive for much longer than the pathetically frail Gilgamesh can hold. There's no need for data scannings to assess the outcome of this mission: sucess is certain. |
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The student has surpassed the master, and now Gilgamesh has come to the pinnacle of his career! Ready to avenge Ultros, Gilgamesh has pulled out all the stops. A mere robot shall not stand in the way of the great Gilgamesh, legendary hero! Wren's fancy technological gadgets are pretty impressive, but none of those toys can stop the mighty Gilgamesh. His speed will see him to the first strike, and from there Gilgamesh can lay into him with his wide array of techniques, and not even Wren's recovery systems can soften an eight-armed assault. It's time for Gilgamesh to claim his crown and rub it in Chisato's face! |
SageAcrin Wren, sadly, couldn't manage to pull himself together in time for the match. This is why trusting Lexis to upgrade you in a timely fashion is a bad idea. Actually, it's just a bad idea to trust Lexis in general, seeing as how Edge is his biggest customer now. Lexis is pretty easy to bribe, too, just show him something shiny and technological. And that's why Wren now has a portable Creamonade installed, designed to blast a large area with highly whipped dairy goodness. (Well, it's a new, revised, portable model of Creamonade. Edge dubbed it the Citrus Spray, a combination of his love of the lemons it would produce and ripping off Shinra. No one said Edge was good at names.) Of course, he doesn't know it yet. But the next time Edge claps his hands four times and yells "I'm the greatest!", Wren will. Then he won't, because Lexis programmed him not to remember it. But I'm sure he'll figure it out the fourth or fifth time that a crowd dismantles him. As for Gilgamesh, he'll get that operation he's always wanted with the prize money. Netting him six more arms. Yes, the mighty twelve-armed Gilgamesh will be a force that can destroy worlds. One swing of his mighty sword/axe/spear/flail/knives/cannon/giant rubber mallet/vampire slayer whip/rubber chicken/magicite/Farfetch'd/frozen tuna super-combo of true horror will destroy even the most hardened opponent. (Well, possibly from laughter, until Gilgamesh learns that you don't swing some of those weapons and that you swing some of those weapons two handed and that some of them aren't weapons. Despite everything, he's really not good with weapons that aren't swords. But hey, lots of plans have little flaws, and everyone has to have a dream.) Well, he will once he gets his money back from whoever stole it, anyways. That horrible monster, ruining his dreams like that! Somewhere, a Farfetch'd is flying off with a check in it's bill and a twinkle in it's eye. Wren: 42 |
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