Season 27, Week 3
Kid
(Chrono Cross)
 
If there is one thing movies have taught us, it's that the young, mischevious kid will always triumph over the older, experienced villain. While Vaida may have assisted the side of right later in her story, she's indeed scary looking enough to be a villain against Kid. She's got her array of personal Red element attacks and Techs, and while it may be tougher to hit physically for Kid, her Elements will carry the day here. Besides, who'd be afraid of a spear blessed by Nergal? To Kid, that's like being blessed by Lynx. Nothing to fear in this battle.

V

S

The mighty flying nightmare Vaida has proven her mettle against Solt, and now prepares to face a slightly more competent foe. Kid's pitiful dagger strikes will avail her not against Vaida, for her dreaded wyvern mount can soar high above the clouds, preventing Kid from ever getting a shot at her. With a puny dagger, Kid stands no chance at disabling a diving, lance-wielding warrior. Her dreaded spear at the ready, it's time to show Kid the quite large difference between fighting a fisherman and fighting a trained feminine fighter.


Ryu Hayabusa
"Bad news, Umbriel," Vaida laughed, patting her wyvern's back. "It's yet another Chrono Cross runt, come to ruin your digestion."

"Kyaaa!!" Umbriel shrieked, spitting in disquist.

"Sorry mum," Kid said, hands on hips. "But yer overgrown lizard'll break his teeth on the likes o' me!"

"Behold, the little runt's got a big mouth!" Vaida said. "Let's see how you talk after I drive a lance through it!"

Unexpectedly, Vaida surged forward, driving the tip of her uber-spear toward Kid's face. But Kid stepped aside just in time, and Vaida found herself spinning around uncontrollably. When she recovered, she realized she was no longer holding the uber-spear.

"Lookin' for this, mum?" Kid smirked, hefting the spear in her hand. "Oh, didja need this to up yer stats? So sorry!"

"You little bitch," Vaida spat. "You know you can't steal weapons in your game or mine. Did you use the mine glitch on me?"

"Finders keepers, losers weepers!" Kid laughed, sticking her tongue out.

"Die!" Vaida commanded, drawing a Killing Edge and hurling herself at Kid in a cyclone of slashing, clawing, biting fury. Kid found herself fighting for her life, barely dodging critical after critical and struggling against Vaida's counterattacks.

Soon Kid was bleeding profusely, though she had landed her fair share of hits on Vaida too. "Ngg!" she winced, dancing back to a defensive stance. "Not bad, mums. But I still have a few tricks left up my sleeve, ya know."

"You're finished. Die quietly for me, will you?" Vaida laughed, climbing higher into the air and launching herself into a high-speed dive, meant to crush Kid like a gnat. But instead she flew straight into a hail of daggers, as Kid unleashed Redpin. At that speed, the damage to Vaida and Umbriel was devastating, and they flew out of the arena to crash into a senseless heap among the stands, killing several spectators instantly.

"Don't mess with the best!" Kid crowed, as the Chrono Cross section erupted in cheers. "That was for turning poor ol' Solt into wyvern food!"

Kid: 51
Vaida: 43

UltraDude
Wonderful... yet another pitifully weak foe from Chrono Cross. Kid, of course, could use magic, always a bit of a problem for Wyvern Lords.

And yet it mattered not. While Kid's magic was certainly as harmful as Vaida's lance blows, the match once again came down to a single factor.

Despite her opponent at least being a cute little girl, Vaida's power of Sexy once again triumphed in the face of a very non-sexy child.

The only question left in Vaida's mind was this - why hadn't Edge and his gang tried something yet?