Season 47, Week 3
Reis Dular
(Final Fantasy Tactics)
 
Reis's damaging breath attacks hide a more disturbing truth behind them - halitosis. This kind of behaviour should quite clearly be disallowed under the Geneva convention, as it constitutes a form of biological warfare dangerous enough to breed a disgusting colony of filth. A colony capable of setting things on fire, freeze them to death or spontaneously create a path of negatively charged electrons between two points so as to emulate a lightning strike between the mouth and the poor victim. Well, it's that or apparently she has some seriously trippy bracelets that shoot fire. While she is a dragon. Um, yeah. That sounds a bit too much like bad Furry Wonder Woman fanfic, so let's go with the bad breath thing. Well, we will not be able to prevent Soren's demise, but we can prevent abuse of this deadly biological weapon to other unfortunate victims.

V

S

It is incredibly unfortunate for Reis to have to face someone of Soren's stature and ability. He spent a great time analyzing Reis and her abilities, knowing full well that he needed to be well-prepared for a battle against her. However, all of that research was completely superfluous in the end because of one simple reason: Reis is a Dragon. Soren's Thunder books do a great deal of damage to Dragons. Alas, poor Reis, we knew ye well. Even if Reis were to somehow able to take a different approach to this battle, it would make little difference. Soren's impressive magical array will burn, slice or shock Reis in any form she opts to use. Let's be fair, however. If Reis were to take a snarling breath on Soren, he would still be able to hit her with some potent spells. It's really too bad, but this truly is a one-sided battle.


Meeplelard

"No! I absolutely refuse to fight her!" shouted Soren.

"Oh come on! What's wrong with your opponent THIS time Soren?" replied Ike

"She's like one of those damn Sub-humans! Just, you know, she's technically not one of them...this puts me in a weird situation cause I really don't know how to approach this fight!"

"I thought you like planning in these obscure situations though..."

"There's a huge difference between wars and simple useless duels, Ike..."

Ike shrugged, not really noticing the difference. Soren stayed true to his word and just sat out the fight.

Reis Dular: 20
Soren: 21