 |
|||||||||
|
 |
|||
|
Malak Galthana (Final Fantasy Tactics) |
|||
Ivalice has a problem. Despite high unemployment of former soldiers after the long war, immigration from less prosperous places continues apace. However, there is a solution! Lord Barinten will simply deploy his elite assassin Malak to kill any illegal aliens who try to enter Ivalice! Like this lazy creature named Starky. Good thing that Malak has the tools to handle this job - with his stylish Chameleon Robe, Starky's holy raygun elements should easily be absorbed. And it's well-known that aliens completely lack faith in the One True Holy Church of St. Ajora, as the unbelievers will punished by the power of Untruth... as well as sticks. Go back to El Nido, Starky! |
V |
S |
The aliens have landed in Light! He may look like a poor man's pikmin and dress like Olimar in a bad day, but Starky is truly a complete alien menace in the works! Malak may be a magician, but he's still backwards country bumpkin compared to Starky, and what do aliens tend to do to backwards country bumpkins? Exactly. With its mighty raygun in hand, Starky'll mow down the competition, and some technologically advanced shielding will more than protect the alien from Malak's magic. The quasi-mohawked sorcerer from Ivalice will have his hands full, and unless he can learn computers anytime soon, it'll all be over before Malak can say Independence Day. |
superaielman Malak's suck is legendary. The mighty 'assassin' boasts the physical stamina of a girl and worse magical abilities than the game's resident old man (Who is a fighter!). His complete ineptness is so legendary that the people of Starky's home planet even knew of it. One abuduction later, Malak was off to Starky's home world, to be studied and understood- how could one claim the powers of hell and be unable to handle your average third grader? Malak Galthana: 20 |
|||