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Cait Sith (Final Fantasy VII) |
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The robotic cat has come a long way. Twenty seasons removed from his first Light championship, Cait Sith stands on the brink of a second title belt, and only the foxy agent Ursula stands in his way. While he can not protect himself against all of Ursula's status at once, his physical will still pack a punch against the fox's poor defenses, and his slots limit with keep him fully healed if she makes even one mistake. Cartoons may have proven that dogs are stronger than cats, but they have also shown that the felines are smarter and more cunning than their canine counterparts- and one controlled by the ingenious Reeve will prove no different. And that's what counts, in a match of this caliber. |
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This week, Ursula sets out to prove the superiority of foxes to cats, as she battles fellow status-slinger Cait Sith. Her attempts are likely to prove fruitful, as the Imperial Captain holds three key advantages over the Shinra spy this week. First, in a battle of status, Ursula is likely to emerge the victor: her Phantom Dress fully protects her from Cait's nasty transformation tricks, while the robotic kitty will at least be vulnerable to her ability to lower defence. Second, Ursula has already proven twice this season that she can win straight slugfests with status out of play; the slower, less powerful Cait can boast no such accomplishment. And finally, foxes are canines and canines are dogs, and if cartoons have taught us anything at all, it's that dogs always defeat cats. |
Joou Ranbu Ursula had gruelling matches the entire season, and the stern fox agent was certain that, if she had to engage yet another full-on fight, she'd suffer a mental breakdown. So, she and Reeve (it's not like talking to a stuffed cat would be productive, anyway) decided to settle their battle in another way. Reeve thought a puppeteering contest would be a good idea. And Ursula agreed. However, Ursula determined that Reeve would use Ershin as his performance doll. Ursula would use Cait Sith. Reeve, fairly confident, took the challenge without hesitation. After all, Ershin wasn't very bright or awake her/him/itself, and Deis would enjoy some days out of the trash can, anyway. Sadly, Deis was as quick to come back home as she was to leave. Apparently, she found some middle-aged hunk in Costa del Sol, and only inside her harem she would have the space and privacy needed. So, while Reeve fruitlessly tried to control Ershin while the trash can humped air and moaned "Oh, yes! Ooooooooh, Orlandu!!!!", Ursula had Cait Sith perform the entirety of "Jesus Christ Superstar" to a full stadium, much to Reeve's chagrin. Such... incident wasn't a part of the foxy agent's plans, but she wouldn't deny a victory by obscene disqualification of the other side, either. Reeve didn't get that short an end of the stick, regardless. With Ursula's uncaring consent, he locked Deis inside Ershin, and breathed life into the trash can - with the mind of a rabid sea monkey. The snake goddess hasn't slept since. Cait Sith: 27 |
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