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Yuna vs Jessica Albert Ted vs Lede Lilka Eleniak vs Bowser Koopa Sheena Fujibayashi vs Zappa
Guv vs Yuri Volte Hyuga Feena vs Zelos Wilder Tengaar vs Lucca Ashtear Nanami vs Wakaba
Week 4 - Quarterfinals




Yuna (FFX) Yuna vs Jessica Albert Jessica Albert (DQ8)

Dark Holy Elf
Y'know, I spent nearly seventy hours on Dragon Quest 8. And the entire time playing the game, I'm not sure an enemy landed an instant death attack on Jessica even once, despite countless attempts.

The results here are obvious. Jessica goes into the match overconfident, sure that nothing Yuna can summon will faze her (after all, Guv can summon three monsters at once, and Yuna only one - how are they even in the same division?), then gets a shot of Pain to the face and dies - both from the attack itself and the shock of seeing an ID attack that doesn't suck.

So Jessica bows out of the competition, and Rhapthorne spends the next week stalking Yuna, begging her to let him study Anima's status attacks so that he can improve his army of dark servants. This culminates in him being handed a restraining order by the Magus Sisters. Or that's what Yuna ordered them to do, but they never were much good at following Yuna's instructions and handed him a Delta Attack instead.

Just another week in RPGDL Godlike, really.

Yuna: 65
Jessica Albert: 30


Guv (DQ8) Guv vs Yuri Volte Hyuga Yuri Volte Hyuga (SHs)

SageAcrin
Poor Guv.

Historically, he has needed to rely on the help of his monster friends to win, in the Duelling League. It isn't always required, naturally, but by and large, it greatly helps him.

Unfortunately, there is a major problem with the Duelling League, if you rely too much on monsters...

---

"So, are you going to call out your meatshields, or what?" Yuri said, cracking his knuckles.

Guv was confused.

He'd whistled.

He'd pointed at Yuri.

He'd jumped back, even.

Where was his monster team?

---

"Woo! Man, this place rocks!" Talos said, as he watched two Nidorans chug it out in a drinking contest, as he leaned back on a boulder.

"What's that annoying whistle?" Blastoise said, in a manner that could only be herd as "Bla bla toise toise bla?" to non-monsters.

"Beats me." He said, shrugging.

"It's...probably...ow." Brickman cut off his slow speech as Talos nudged him in the chest.

"We don't know." Talos said, nodding, as he relaxed back against the boulder.

That's right.

Guv's problem is that inheirently, wild monsters on the world of the Duelling League are wild in more ways than one.

---

"And so-a, Guv has-a proven that he truly cannot compete with me, raggazos!" Morrie said from his judges box, as Yuri laid out Guv with one swift punch to the jaw. "His spirit, his link with his monsters, has nothing on me! Yes, he may be able to find-a superior monsters, and have-a the true passion! But he will never defeat me at spirit! At his link with his monstrous companions!" He said, satisfied.

"Now, if you'll excuse me, I need to cook dinner for my Slimes." He added with a smile, as he left the judges box.

The other three judges, a Liquid Metal Slime, a Cureslime, and a Hell Gladiator, happily followed.

Guv: 33
Yuri Volte Hyuga: 56

Xan
Hahaha, Yuri, vs a character who will make him waste ALL his MP? ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THIS IS HARDLY FAIR!





Ted (S4) Ted vs Lede Lede (FFT)

Sei
Ted couldn't believe it. After years of disappointment and mockery, after months of training, after weeks of winning one difficult match after another...

...he was beaten.

And easily at that.

By a girl in an exotic dancer's outfit.

Through instant death, something his Soul Eater should have specialized in.

Needless to say, the bot so young True Rune bearer was feeling quite emasculated right now.

No, Ted was not going to stand for this. It was one thing to be get smacked around by evil trees. It was quite another thing to be done in as well by... by...

"LEEEEEEEEDE!" Ted screamed, as he rose to his feet and dramatically pointed a manly finger at the celebrating woman. "I taunt at your general direction you little slut! You may have defeated my body in battle, but I say to you, you have not defeated my heart!" The archer ranted as veins started sticking out from his head, neck, and biceps.

Hearing this, Lede faced Ted with a smirk on her face, and raising her hand up to her mouth, she let out a roaring bitch laugh "O~HOHOHOHOHOHO~! Silly boy! I have crushed your fighting style completely! What more is there for me to prove, you big fat poopie head?" She responded, punctuating her point with a raspberry.

Ted chuckled at this, then roared out his sentiments. "HA HA HA HA HA! And an additional HA to you, you stupid girl! How little you know of a man's soul! Defeating me in battle is only half of the battle! No.. for you to completely dominate me, you'll need to defeat me as the lord of DANCE!"

With that declaration, Ted ripped off his clothes, revealing tight leather pants, leather boots, a black cap, a leather vest with a sheriff badge on it, and nothing else. The crowd gasped in response.

"Hah! If that is what is needed to destroy you, then I accept your challenge!" And Lede removed her clothes, revealing an sailor suit underneath. In the Japanese schoolgirl fetish sense, complete with white blouse, red neckerchief, and short tartan skirt.

No sooner had these two done their costume changes did the entire arena grow dark, and a large disco ball lowered from the ceiling. Multi-colored laser lights flashed very which way in a dizzying pattern as the first strings of music began.

Young man, there's no need to feel down.
I said, young man, pick yourself off the ground.
I said, young man, 'cause you're in a new town
There's no need to be unhappy.

And as the song continued, the duelists in the stands ripped off their clothes as well, revealing similarly colorful outfits underneath. Fou Lu's bare chest glistened as he danced in his construction worker vest, while Sephiroth, in a police man costume similar to Ted sans top, grooved under the lights. The well-oiled body of Ryu3 was well-emphasized by his brown vest, loin cloth and moccasins combo, and Ghaleon showed that females are not the only ones who could make the sailor-themed Japanese school uniform look hot as he showed off a more revealing version of his magical girl outfit.

And down in the ring, oblivious to all, Ted and Lede danced like they have never danced before as Mewtwo in his backwards baseball cap, long tee, and ice worked the music.

"Y! M! C! A!"

---

Meanwhile, in a pocket dimension one short space manipulation away, two figures watched the events as they sighed/cackled madly while typing on a keyboard.

"Luther, you're a suicidal loony." The sighing figure said as she rubbed her glowing forehead with a glowing hand. "You know they're going to draw and quarter and slice and dice and tar and feather and ressurect and chibi-size you before sending you to Albedo and Brahne for a week of molestation and sodomy once they figure out you did this, right?"

"I don't care, Belial." Luther, the slowly typing Godlike programmer responded. "Take this long to get me into the DL, will they? Delay me just because I'm not photogenic, will they!? Well, I'll show them if my name is not Gabri- Indale- dammit! Luther! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!"

Belial just shook her head in disgust while maintaining the pocket dimension. Well, at least she and Scythe now have tickets to Gemety.

Ted: 36
Lede: 49


Feena (G1) Feena vs Zelos Wilder Zelos Wilder (ToS)

superaielman
Frustration. Rage. Anger.

Poor planning. Defeat. Humilation.

Rinse. Lather. Repeat.

Something was wrong in the DL universe. Rune Walsh, esper and hero, had been thwarted nonstop by Justin and Feena. The two's combined brainpower couldn't match Rune with a hangover, let alone Rune when he was fully focused and committed. Something was wrong, and Rune had to find out. He went to the best and sharpest mind in the DL for help, and to get him back on the correct course.

Mewtwo promptly launched Rune out of his area for daring to interrupt a catnap. Which led a sore and most annoyed Esper to the DL pharmacy..

---

Rune walked towards the arena. What Bowman had said made perfect sense, and yet.. it wasn't his style. Certainly wasn't the brighest move. After the beatings he had taken, he was willing to try anything.

"So you're saying that the way to best Justin and Feena isn't planning, but straightforward attacking?"

"Correct."

"Uh.."

"Justin and Feena are protected by Justin's Aura of Idiocy. It in fact is so strong that it actually shatters the IQ scale and turns into a shield of ultimate intellegence. It makes them immune to plotting and planning from anything. A combined braintrust of Mewtwo, Lezard Valeth, Ghaleon, Fou-Lu, Leon Silverburg, and Rashidi would be utterly crushed."

"Mmm. Well, it makes no sense, but neither does Justin outsmarting me. Thanks for the advice, Bowman. It's time for me to set things straight!"



Anything. Even taking the advice of a pill popping loser with a wife and a downgrade on his record. To his dismay, Wugui was in front of the arena doors, blocking his way.

Without a second thought, Rune charged headfirst at Wugui, and shouldered the demonic ganster to the ground. While the attack obviously didn't hurt Wugui enough, it stunned him long enough to let Rune enter the arena. Still running, Rune took quick look at the ring. Feena was slowly walking into the ring. "Think you can get the best of me, eh? I'll show you!" Rune's sprinting got him close to Feena. "Taste ultimate magic, wench!"

Rune's Legion spell was at the tip of his fingers. He could feel the magical energies crackling and shifting, as if the very space between his hands was being damaged by his magic. Rune raised his hands in triumph. He had surprised Feena, and nothing would stop him. Practically screaming in joy, Rune blasted Feena with his strongest spell, hitting her directly in the chest. Victory was his, without a doubt.

Except Rune had forgotten one thing. One tiny thing. Feena may not have been the toughest girl against physicals, but she could take a spell reasonably well. The force of the blow didn't KO Feena. What it did do was push her into the arena. Wasting no time, Zelos cut Feena down with an effortless stroke from the Last Fencer. While he hadn't KOed Feena himself, his efforts had led to her losing her duel before it even really began!

Rune laughed at the results. Victory truly was his! Escaping was just as easy as leaving, as Justin and the crowd was too stunned to react after what had transpired. Rune slowed to an amble as he passed the arena doors. A simple teleportation spell would get him back to the safety of his room, and there wasn't any way Feena's friends could reach him in time. However, that wasn't his biggest worry. In escaping the arena, Rune had forgotten who he had knocked over on his way in. Feeling a light tap on his shoulder, Rune turned around. Who would dare annoy him now? A potential date? A random fan? Both? Rune blanched at the sight before him. Instead of a fan or a woman asking for a date, a hideous man stood in front of him. Well, 'man'. You couldn't really call Wugui human any more.

"You remember me? Good, because this is going to hurt. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice.. well, that's not anything we have to worry about, is it?"

Rune sighed and prepared for the incoming attacks. A beating from Wugui was a small price to pay for success.

Feena: 33
Zelos Wilder: 36

Fireball
Zelos took one look at Feena and laughed.

" Okay, hunny," he said, smiling. " Watch this."

Feena, who had married a man whose IQ was so low as to make Odin look impressive, watched as Zelos promptly explained a simple mathematical principle. This display of (to Feena) overwhelming brainpower immediately won her heart and her pants, and Season XXX had a love scene born without the perverts.

Who knew that proving 1+1=2 could be so useful?

Xan
Zelos will win, proving once again that the fact that you can do his moves without breaking all your joints>all. plus, something tells me that prior to the match, Rune is going to manage to get himself some revenge. JUST NO INTERFERENCE DAMNIT.





Lilka Eleniak (WA2) Lilka Eleniak vs Bowser Koopa Bowser Koopa (SMRPG)

SageAcrin
Bowser was stunned.

A girl? Wearing pink? With an umbrella? Here, waiting for him? It couldn't be...

It had to be a dream!

After several dozen tries of pinching himself and eventually giving up and smashing himself over the head with a rock, he realized the truth, that this was no dream. No, this was a wonderful, sweet reality. Sweeping her up, and ignoring her cries to be let go, he rushed out of the arena.

---

"Worked just like I said it would." Kanon said, as she watched Bowser happily rush out of the arena with the dressed-in-pink Lilka. "Bowser gets a ring-out due to hitting ground out of the arena before Lilka does, and she wins."

"...how's she going to get let go, though?" Ashley asked, puzzled.

"Oh, that's her problem. She just asked me for advice on how to win." Kanon said, shrugging.

"...so, you're not going to be part of the rescue, then." Brad said, nodding.

"She's eaten my food without asking for the last time." Kanon said, nodding, as she walked off, satisfied with her day's work.

Lilka Eleniak: 53
Bowser Koopa: 34

Silverlocke980
Poor Lilka.

There are just days when one's luck runs out. Particularly when one meets a person who, though your utter opposite in every other way, manages to be just like you in one respect.

Turns out Bowser's got pretty decent magic defense in the RPGDL realm.

Lilka quit the match by forfeit.




Tengaar (Suikos) Tengaar vs Lucca Ashtear Lucca Ashtear (CT)

SageAcrin
Money fixes everything.

As this match clearly shows.

Charmles is a rich prince, and he knows how to throw money at things. With the bankroll available to him, he had swiftly secured his rightful place on the judge's panel for this match. Yes, he would soon have the combatants in their rightful places, covered in whipped cream and cowering before his magnificent stature! No one could stop him! No one!

---

"...I think he fainted." Dekar said, bashing the unconcious Charmles over the head with the butt of his blade. "What is his problem? All that happened was Macha and Gremio walking into the arena."

"I think someone forgot to tell him that Lucca and Tengaar hired seconds to fight the match out for them." Ronfar said, smiling. "He had plans for this match."

It was an uneventful match, really. Macha's feminine wiles and brutal yet motherly fighting style quickly proved too much for Gremio, and he quickly collapsed.

Then a delirious, half-maddened, now-awakened-by-repeated-Dekar-headblows Charmles, believing the objects of his affection had entered the arena, as he stared upon Macha and Gremio with blurred vision, threw the switch.

Flooding the arena with whipped cream.

What occured after is best left unsaid.

But, Gremio does have a new sugar mama, after all is said and done. (Tir is incredibly heartbroken, obviously.)

Tengaar: 40
Lucca Ashtear: 53




Sheena Fujibayashi (ToS) Sheena Fujibayashi vs Zappa Zappa (CC)

SageAcrin
A cute, busty, perky ninja girl.

A man with balls of iron. Stronger, more stamina, more capable of dominating her.

There was clearly only one way Sheena could win this.

---

"..." A vast silence encompassed the arena, punctuated only by Zappa's screams, as they faded off into the distance.

"Well, that worked. Don't think I'm getting forgiven soon, though." Sheena said, sighing.

"...um. Colette. Did you really have to shove Corinne down Zappa's pants?" Lloyd said, swallowing repeatedly as he recalled the horrific devistation from the scene.

"...Yes." She replied simply, as she walked out of the arena.

Corinne, who had returned to Sheena just for this match, because Sheena had said she needed the little creature to win, is still not talking to Sheena.

As it turns out, neither are any perverts.

As for Zappa?

Well, it turns out he truly did have Balls of Iron. He'll be okay.

But the mental scars will last forever.

Sheena Fujibayashi: 49
Zappa: 28

Xan
Much as I hate to admit it, but Zappa wins due to the fact that he has the range advantage, and Sheena is notorious for dieing quickly if she doesn't achieve overlimit.




Nanami (S2) Nanami vs Wakaba Wakaba (S2)

Orson Carola
Here's an interesting scenario...the two martial arts girls of Suikoden II, both of different martial arts backgrounds. Normally, this would be an epic battle of fistfighting this side of the Karate Kid, but there is one little factor in this...

...this IS Season XXX...

The decision was to use a formula that could work to draw in the crowd, so they fell back onto what L.C.Chan did with Wakaba during the Prelims. And that is why Nanami and Wakaba are in the middle of the stadium wearing sailor fuku...or maybe it was because someone got L.C.Chan in the judge's box with Edge and Zelos.

"I can see that we must face each other and represent our ways of the martial arts," Nanami said, "though I don't understand why we have to wear these uniforms for this." Wakaba then told Nanami what Chan said before the fight with Banon. With everything making sense, the match was on. Nanami took the initiative with opening with a double hit, which saw Wakaba returning with a dose of White Tiger. In the tradition of such, the nosebleeds started to pour and the stadium floor started taking a crimson color. The match went on for what seemed like forever with Nanami and Wakaba dishing out the hits and pain while the nosebleeds flooded the stadium. Nanami hit twice, Wakaba uses White Tiger and goes offbalance. Nanami hits twice, Wakaba regains balance, nosebleeds flood arena. After a while, Wakaba finally succeeded in winning, but the arena was more like a reservoir, so they had to drain the blood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Nosebleeds involving perversion can be OK, just make sure there's a drain nearby, of else the arena will be getting a new shade of red.

Nanami: 21
Wakaba: 66

Rad Link 5
Colette was rather angry at Wakaba for eliminating he before her chance to "shine" this season. She was after all the beautiful blond haired, blue eyed, sweet as a sugur cookie, flat as an ironing board Chosen after all. How could she not have any suitors? She kept thinking about how she lost the chance at a light chamionship and (more importantly) a legion of fanboys, causing her to get angrier and angrier until she finally decided it was time for revenge.

She appeared at the arena the day of the match. She was preparing to Pow Hammer Wakaba into the ground. "I have to do everything right." she told herself repeatedly. Then the right moment presented itself...

She lunged out into the arena... and tripped. Tossing the hammers as she fell face first into the ground, she quickly lifted her head just in time to see the hammers hit... Nanami. Surprisingly, this was enough to knock her out.

The judges decided it wasn't interference as much as it was a normal case of Colette being at the arena that day and gave Wakaba the match.

As for Colette, her pants happened to get stuck on a wall as she tripped, causing them to come off as she hit the ground. The resulting panty shot provoked many of the lower perverts of the league to begin stalking her. She actually seems to be enjoying the creepy letters and phone calls however. Guess this turned out good for everyone who isn't Nanami.

destiny sutton
so i pick nanami because she nice and cute so good luck nanami!! :)


The Kings and/or Queens of Season XXX
~CmdrQueen


Scar
The theme of this season is of course focused on the women fighting. How can someone named Yuri POSSIBLY lose?

Yuri wins by name alone.

Next!


Virginia/Maya: 22
Asellus/White Rose: 14
Dart/Lavitz: 8
Seed/Culgan: 8
Yuri/Alice: 34

Orson Carola
If there's one image that sticks in my mind, its that cover of SH, with Yuri holding Alice. That was the stuff of legends.

khaki_knight
Come on. This is totally Yuri's season. The man's unstoppable!

Klayne
Yuri has this one in the bag

sailorstarhealer@hotmail.com
Maya and Ginny all the way. There's a reason it's called "Wild" Arms.

Xan
Virginia/Maya. HOT

Season XXX presents: The Miss Android Miss/ter Artificial Being beauty pageant!
~Gatewalker


SageAcrin
As we all know, neither other androids, nor perverts, can truly compare with the sexiness of the android that is nearly in a canonical lesbian relationship.

As such, the results of this match are really quite obvious.

The judges make KOS-MOS and Emeralda make out while everyone watches, then declares KOS-MOS the winner.

Everyone wins!

Especially the two bots. I mean, they have so much in common. From Xeno-series games, both have screwed up parents, both can turn various parts of their bodies into weapons of mass destruction, both are fanservicey, it's a match made in heaven, obviously.


KOS-MOS: 24
Emeralda: 14
Kuja: 13
Limstella: 7
Gepetto: 8
Perverts: 23

Orson Carola
KOS-MOS remains the sexiest android alive in an easy victory.

Draco Ignifer
Emmy or KOS-MOS... damn, an embarrasment of riches here.

Xan
Kuja. duh. he recites poetry, and his sheer awesomeness DESTROYS THE COMPETITION. and um yeah. three countries away. indeed.

cocosai@hotmail.com
The kuja option is very nice.