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Sephiroth vs Lambda Zellweger
legendaryflyingfailure There is a short list of people who can survive the planet they are standing on exploding via engulfment in a supernova. I will now begin to innumerate them. 1. Sephiroth 2. Kefka 3. Yuri Hyuga (probably) Notice who ISN'T on this list. As a related side note. Sephiroth may be a whiny assed mama's boy. But he is still a bad mutherF*&#$r. He deserves more respect than fighting greenies in the Godlike semi-finals. Sephiroth: 46 Mathias
Motta
Jade vs Piastol
superaielman The Angel of Death was looking a little nervous of late. Edge's constant attempts to harass and attack here, while unsuccessful, had begun to fray her nerves. Every day and night. At all hours. Be it Edge, a paid minion, or just simply a Fuma thrown in her generation direction. What made it worse was the constant harassment from the DL police. Constantly getting questioned and fined for minor reasons or none at all. Piastol had amazing resources at her disposal thanks to her Godlike titles and vast fortune she saved up from her wins, but even her most secure buildings and locker rooms were constantly being invaded and fought over. Defending against that stretched her thin, or maybe a little more. With Edge's obvious subversion of the DL police, only paid flunkies and Galcian would assist her. She couldn't go anywhere else for help. Even in the arena, Piastol faced trouble. She had to dodge a hail of thrown Defenders, beat up a dozen FFT Knight in a Kill Bill style fight, and sprint her way past a spike pit trap just to get to the ring. Just making it to the ring was a relief. At least she knew what her foe was going to do... ..Normally. Jade, Godlike champion who so wanted a rematch with the last person to stop him in the finals, had been perforated by errant thrown weapons from various Ninjas. A single Tempest Dance literally knocked Jade into several bloody pieces. After that, the real fun started when Eblan and Orlandu's combined Ninja army stopped lurking and directly attacked Piastol in the center of the ring. Piastol fought off the attack desperately, barely holding her own. One question raced through her mind: Why hadn't Edge himself closed into attack here? --- "That's part of goal three down, at least. With the constant attacks on Piastol, neither her sanity or stamina's going to last long." The expression on Edge's face was amused. He had an evil twinkle in his eye to match. "Wish they hadn't mauled Jade, but..more chances to make her suffer. Oh yes." Edge sat back in the comfort of Orlandu's private suite at the top of the arena. He was by himself, as Orlandu and Fuse had already went go to handle Raquel. "Mmm. About time for me to head off to the arena as well.." Jade: 25 Barubary
Imperial
Galcian vs Raquel Applegate
superaielman Raquel knew the man who was striding towards her. Who didn't know the face of Cidolfas Orlandu, Holy Swordsman and one of the Godlike Champions? It had to be quick one way or the other, as Raquel's fight was on in a few minutes. Orlandu bowed to the drifted. "Ah, Raquel is it? A pleasure to meet you, my dear. While I'd normally be delighted to spend some time catching up with such a promising young fighter, I'm afraid I don't have time. What I do want you to have is this." Orlandu withdrew a large sword at his side. Excalibur. Sword of the real king. One of the strongest weapons in the multiverse, with raw power that surpasses even that of the Princess Saber. More to the point, holding it grants the wearer with a limitless Haste spell. Raquel's one flaw was her speed. With Excalibur, that was no longer a factor. "Why are you offering me such a powerful weapon? How is it legal?" "Simply put, Galcian must pay for his crimes." "Crimes?" "..He did what to Rydia? That slime." Raquel's face was a mask of outrage. "Abusing a poor girl, on top of his other foul acts? Cheating? That can't be allowed to stand. But.. won't using that weapon get me DQed?" "Don't worry about that. Galcian wishes to play games with rigging the judges? He's about to learn that not everyone is as much of a pushover as Teodora." Orlandu reached into his pocket and pulled out a small engraved ring. "This will take care of his Eternum spell as well. Also.." Even more surprising was Orlandu reaching into his cloak and pulling out a pair of rubberized boots, made to look and fit exactly like her normal ones. "This should also take care of Terminal." "Thank you, I suppose. You're sure this will work?" "I give you my word. Now go and avenge all of those who were oppressed by Galcian's cheating ways!" --- When Raquel walked into the arena, she saw exactly what Orlandu meant. The judge's box was not friendly to Galcian, to say the least. The lead judge was Cecil Harvey. His wife Rosa stood at his side. Both shot most unpleasant looks at Galcian. Flanking them both stood Fuse. Everyone knew that he had thrown his lot in with Edge. Speaking of whom.. A grinning Edge stood by the judge's box, with a rather large crate of Phoenix Downs, and an even larger crate of Elixirs. Shrugging, Raquel hefted Excalibur and ran straight at Galcian. The first swing from Excalibur knocked Galcian off his feet. Raquel sprinted over, prepared to finish him off cleanly with a second b low before he could react. Galcian however popped right back up. Yet.. Edge had just tossed a Elixir on him! What manner of trickery was this!? Raquel then noticed that Galcian wasn't grinning or even gloating about popping up. He in fact looked worried. That didn't stop him from executing Terminal on Raquel, aiming at her with the intent of ending the fight fast. The thunderous energies of Terminal crackled throughout Raquel's body.. and harmlessly discharged to the arena floor thanks to her Rubber Boots. Galcian caught Raquel off guard by firing off Eternum before Raquel could react. Everyone knew that the spell's Instant Death effect couldn't miss.. unless it was blocked. Raquel's ring glowed slightly from the spell. From the stunned look on Valua's former head Admiral, Raquel knew the attack had failed. More surprising was Excalibur gloating with a faint white sheen. Raquel blinked. The slight shock from the physical impact of Terminal was gone. Eternum had healed the damage. Raquel swung Excalibur again, this time connecting the flat of the blade to Galcian's face. He crumpled to the ground in pain.. and popped right back up when Edge threw another Elixir his way. This was going to be a long fight. Raquel, smiling and enjoying using such a fine weapon, didn't mind a bit. ---- Edge sighed. He supposed the fight had to end sometime. Who knew that you could actually go through 99 Elixirs and 99 Phoenix Downs in one sitting? The crowd had already long since emptied out of the arena, once it was obvious that Galcian was going to literally get beaten until Edge ran out of supplies. After the last few full healings, Galcian couldn't even lift his sword or cast a spell to defend himself. He was truly helpless. Raquel had left the arena as soon as Edge tossed the last Phoenix Down on Galcian, who was twitching and not even bothering to defend himself after the last three dozen or so full Intrude chains. Cecil had awarded the fight to the Drifter. It hadn't taken long for her to give her (tired) thanks to Edge for the assistance, and to hand Excalibur back to Orlandu. Cecil and Rosa had even drifted off, while Fuse and Orlandu went to go clear up the paperwork and pay off the required people to put such an all emcompassing ass beating together. Galcian was ever so slowly crawling to his feet. A boot to the back of the neck from Edge fixed that. So he thought that minor lesson was enough punishment, did he? "You went too far, Galcian. You messed with Rydia and worked with that wench Piastol. Costing you the heavy title was just the start of the fun." The sound of a pair of swords being drawn got Galcian to ever so slowly look upward at Edge. "From the look on your face, you thought that what Raquel did was it, didn't you?" Edge gestured to a second pair of crates.. and a third.. and a fourth.. all marked the same as the ones he just emptied in that joke of a fight. "You're not going to be hurting anyone else for a long, long time." Galcian couldn't even find the energy to whimper. Galcian: 28 
Legretta vs Shadow
Monkeyfinger When an elite gunner and a master ninja meet to fight, there can only be one kind of crowd to witness it: A huge group consisting half of morbidly obese, piss drunk NRA rednecks that have smaller hicks with names like Cletus and Cooter and Dale orbiting around their center of gravity, and the other half comprised of pasty, equally fat japanophiles wearing Bleach shirts, Naruto headbands, and a sweat stench so think as to be visible. Their purpose? To settle the ages old debate of the blade of the ninja vs. a big fuckin' gun. Shadow snuck up on Legretta, slashed her brutally, and did a graceful tumble backwards. Legretta did a lightning fast pirouette and shot at him. Interceptor leapt to catch the bullet, bit it, and spit it into the stands. Shadow drew out the power of a vanish edge and disappeared, only to eat a searing blast of revealing white light followed by a couple bullets before he could capitalize on his new advantage. So then, the hicks hooted and hollered and shot their shooters into the air, the nerds broke down crying, got laughed at, pulled out their plastic katanas and started hacking away. Oh yeah, a bunch of them got massacred, but as soon as the bullets on the other side ran out the nerds became a huge, unstoppable moving demon wall of rancid flab, slithering over their opposition and suffocating most of them, as well as countless of their own number, to death. The two duellers quit fighting and looked slackjawed at the scene above them. Did their fighting styles, when allowed to be seen by the masses, really attract so much stupidity, so much needless carnage? Was this the fruits of their lifetimes of training? Staring the enormity of their situation right in the face, Shadow and Legretta reacted quite logically. Shadow committed sepukku, while Legretta became an hero, much to the dismay of the few surviving onlookers. Oh yeah, Shadow's katana went into and out of his belly before Legretta's bullet went through her own brainpan so Legretta won. Legretta: 47
Magdalen Harts vs Philia Felice
SageAcrin "I'm telling you, it'll work. And it's your only hope." Philia shook her head. "Oh, come on, the last time I fell for one of your plans, you had me half-way talked into putting on lingerie and seducing Malik." Philia said disgustedly. "At least Rutee talked me out of it by telling me all of those facts about Malik you left out...Clemente, your plans are horrible." Philia finished in disgust, as she tossed her sword on her bed. "Wait!" Clemente desperately yelled. "It's not my plan!" "...You talk to people besides us?" Philia asked. "When neccesary." Her sword haughtily replied. "I've been given inside information on this battle, and you'd do best to listen to me." "I'm still going to regret this." Philia replied, sighing. --- Magdalen. Proud warrior butler. Possessing an inhuman strength and speed, his sword fighting skills are rarely matched. But he has a weakness. When a young woman with blonde hair appeared, sporting a pair of guns, a familiar dress, and a odd braid/ribbon/corkscrew hairstyle appeared in the arena, and angrily informed him that Court Seim was under attack by Gobs, and what was he doing here when she needed him?, Magdalen had no real hope of victory. Rushing out of the arena, he ran to do his mistress' bidding. By the time he reached Court Seim, only to find out that absolutely nothing had happened since Jane and he had left for the League, it was too late. Philia, however, found that it's exceedingly hard to dye your hair back the exact same shade of green. Of course, the real winner in all of this is Clemente. Not only did he talk Philia into cosplaying one of the cutest young girls in the league, he had pictures taken. Besides, Swordians are often lonely, and it turns out that his source of information is too. Asgard likes having a friend. (How can Asgard communicate information, you ask? Go ask a silent main.) Magdalen Harts: 27 
Juan vs Balk Fenzol
SageAcrin The horrors of machinery. A fist fighter, attempting to struggle against the flow of bullets, needing only one good punch to lay low his opponent, as his cruel adversary laughs, calling down heaven's thunder with each lethal shot. The horrified cries of the crowd, as the noble fighter falls, covered in blood, singed, defeated. The evil laughter of the cruel engineer, master of ancient technology, ringing out in the arena. That's how you'd think this would go, wouldn't you? --- Balk stared down at his gun, stunned. "But...but that doesn't happen!" He shrieked, as he aimed it at Juan again. To another hollow click. Juan snored peacefully, his hair cheerily blazing, his entire body covered in a layer of ash. Juan had reached a new level of power, from special training with Snorlax, that Balk could only dream of. As Juan snoozed peacefully, Balk realized the true horror of fighting someone too lazy to die. Shrieking in rage, Balk ran out of the arena, leaving Juan the victor. However, this terrible technique comes at a price. As Juan learned when he woke up bald, covered with floor wax(Evidently the waxers are automated and didn't notice him.), and with various scribbles all over his body. Only later did he find the pictures of himself sleeping peacefully in random Duelling League women's arms. Sadly, it was too late to undo his sealing of the dangerous technique, that of being Too Lazy To Die. Juan: 50
Cleo vs Palom
SageAcrin A naughty little boy. A young girl. There were many ways this could end. All of them bad. All things considered, though, this one went pretty well. --- Cleo slumped to the ground, stunned. Her opponent was simply too much for her, and too little like she'd heard. Her magic resources were exhausted. Her attacks had no effect on her foe, who had simply shrunk her. Where had everything gone wrong? Cleo still wondered as a blast of light stole her thoughts away. --- "Remind me. How did you talk me into dressing up as you?" Porom asked, disgusted, as she walked out of the arena. "And you did disable the judges, right?" "Oh, sure. And you did great! Taking all that painful fire magic for me! You're the best sister e-" "Stop that." "Okay, okay. At least I didn't accept Zidane's deal to-" "Don't remind me." Porom said disgustedly, pulling off her wig. "Just win in the finals, okay? This had better have been worth it." She added, coughing up some ash from the repeated firestorms. Cleo: 34 Max411
Frank Goldfinger vs Vinsfeld Rhadamanthus
SageAcrin It looks to be a good fight, this match. Vinsfeld Rhadamanthus is a seasoned competitor, with a long list of victories. Let's take a look at his duelling history. His first season, for instance, shows this well. After defeating Hrist Valkyrie, at the time one of the worst duellers ever, he faced Grey. And lost. Of course, this season, she then went up against Logg. And lost, having had a Garden smashed into him, winning only on technicality. His last match before entering the semi-finals was against Colette Brunel, which, of course, he must have won. Oh, my mistake, he won on appeal. He lost the match. I think I speak for everyone when I ask, what's wrong with this picture. Needless to say, Vinsfeld surrendered the moment that Frank summoned a Kuri-er, the moment he physically attacked. Yeah. That's it. This isn't clearly a rip-off of anything. Frank Goldfinger: 33
REJECTED! SageAcrin Feathers flew at the taping of this album. Shigeo, cackling madly, strutted his stuff, with an impressive guitar pecking solo that had everyone claping their hens. Thursday's drumming was incredible. Flailing like a chicken with it's head cut off, a mad bok-bok-bok sound coming from his drums, his skill egged on the rest of the band. And Fujin and Zoah's hilarious dancing had everyone cluckling. These four can truly be called the cocks of the walk, today. Yes, truly, this was a great success, as a son- ... Wait, what. This song's about penises, not cocks? Oh, god, that's too easy. I quit. #4 wins. Blah, no challenge at all. Girls smiling: 0 Money: 4 Men smiling: 8 Penis: 15 TV: 4 Internet memes: 7 Literature: 3 Robot slaves: 9 Math: 10 Penis: 0 Boring!: 6 memnhok@yahoo.com
Joou Ranbu
Taishyr
Sir Alex
Djinn
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