 | Man, we're still here?
|
 | Only for a bit longer. I've got Chisato in the lab working on a way for you to get home. She's making good progress.
|
 | Well that's good.
|
 | Hey, I wouldn't mind stickin' around a bit longer. The food here is primo.
|
| Don't you have a kingdom to get back to ruling?
|
| Nah, the place pretty much runs itself, so long as Kirby ain't messing things up. And he's here with me!
|
 | Hiii~
|
| What about Meta Knight?
|
| ...y'know, maybe I do need to get back to make sure that masked weirdo isn't trying to stir up some kinda revolution while I'm gone. It'd be just like him to do that, too.
|
| So I assume you're still fine with running the show this week?
|
| I'm game. Is there anything special we're supposed to do for the beginning of a season instead of the end?
|
| Nope. Same stuff, different week.
|
| Yeah, we've got it down by now, then. No problem.
|
| Excellent. I'm going to go check on Chisato's progress.
|
| Alright then. Well, welcome everyone to the 43rd season of the RPGDL. I'm your host, Princess Zelda,
|
| And I'm Solid Snake.
|
| And we're here to take you Behind the Scenes. For our first guest, we have an old friend of mine who has retired from the Smash Brothers scene to devote his full attention here at the DL, the psychic powerhouse, Mewtwo.
|
 | A pleasure as always, Princess.
|
| Also representing Godlike, we have a woman who can swing a sword hard enough to make Ike jealous, former Heavy champion and upgrader, Raquel Applegate.
|
 | Nice to meet you all.
|
| So Mewtwo, I have to ask, what is it about the Dueling League that makes you so formidable as to be a feared Godlike, when...ah...
|
| When I was so absolutely god awful at Smash that the likes of Pikachu were embarrassed to admit he was from the same game?
|
| Well, yes.
|
| Hey, bein' worse then Pikachu ain't nothing to be ashamed of. The little rat's a beast.
|
| Simply a case of different worlds, different rules. Note that Pikachu, as fearsome as he may be in a Brawl, is a ranked Light here, and not even a particularly strong one.
|
| That's a bit hard to buy.
|
| I'll have to agree, Mr. Snake. I'm finding it nearly impossible to believe that cute little mouse is some kind of powerful fighter where you're from.
|
| Well, believe it sister.
|
| Well, we're getting off topic. Mewtwo, you know that you'll be facing the returning champion, Lady. What are your thoughts on that? Think you can dethrone her?
|
| My thoughts? Merely that this is par for my course, quite frankly. I'm not surprised in the least about drawing her, nor do I have particularly high hopes for victory. Fortunately, I am a patient creature.
|
| Poor guy. I just hope my godlike luck doesn't turn out like yours.
|
| Do you think you'll fare well against KOS-MOS, Raquel?
|
| I think so. She is faster then me...
|
| Who isn't?
|
| but I think I can send her to the scrap heap before she really gets going. Speed is nice, but I'll take hitting like the proverbial ton of bricks just fine, thank you very much.
|
| Haw! I like your style, missy.
|
| You would, tubby.
|
| You say somethin', scarecrow?
|
| Knock it off, boys.
|
| Boys will be boys, no matter where they're from, it seems.
|
| Tell me about it. Well, Raquel, Mewtwo, thanks for coming and I wish you luck in your matches.
|
| Thanks, but I shouldn't need it.
|
| I'll take your share then. I will need it.
|
| Poor guy. Can't win at Smash, and can't even seem to win here. He's got some kind of luck.
|
| No kidding. Well, Kirby, could you bring in the Heavies for me?
|
| ^_^
|
| Are you sure that's safe?
|
| Relax, we fed him twelve breakfasts this morning, so even he should be full enough to not eat the guests.
|
| Hiii~
|
 | So...this little pink thing is the fearsome guest eating monster? Doesn't that just beat all?
|
 | It's...cute.
|
| Since when are cute and dangerous mutually exclusive?
|
| Well, Rei, Asellus, welcome to the show.
|
| Sure thing.
|
| I assure you, the pleasure is all mine.
|
| Um, okay. So Rei, I have to ask, with five different Ryu's running around here, how do you keep track of yours?
|
| It's pretty easy, really. Most folks around here think of my Ryu first when the name comes up. Benefits of being a multi-champ in Godlike, I guess.
|
| I see. Do you have any thoughts to share about your upcoming match with Lenny Curtis?
|
| I'll turn into a Weretiger and rip him a new one? Don't really need to think much about most of my fights, they're either quick draws or slugging matches.
|
| Keepin' it simple. That's the way to do things, if you ask me.
|
| Hmm, I prefer having lots of options, myself.
|
| Do you think your options will help you against the sheer amount of damage that Hect can bring against you?
|
| Well considering that damage is one of those options, and unlike her, I don't crumple to a sneeze, yes I do. And I could always just charm her out of her wits if I feel like having a bit of fun with it.
|
| Charm her? But...you're both girls.
|
| Doesn't make a bit of difference to my Mystic magic, sweetie. I could show you how it works sometime, if you'd like.
|
| ...
|
| (Psst, is she flirting with the princess?)
|
| (Yup.)
|
| (That's hot.)
|
| (Yup.)
|
| Well, ah, I think that's all the time we have for Heavy. Thanks for coming, now we really need to move on to middle. Kirby, if you would?
|
| Uh, yeah. Later.
|
| Aw, but we've barely had time to talk.
|
| I think that's the point.
|
| Hiiii~
|
 | So we're up now?
|
 | ...
|
| Why hello. Actually I think I'll be sticking around for awhile. Don't mind me, just go on about your business. Just pretend I'm not here.
|
| Asellus, you're a mystic. I think ignoring you is nearly impossible.
|
| I dunno, that chick seems to be managing just fine.
|
| ...so...cute...
|
| ???
|
| Is this the same serious girl who was sitting in the waiting room?
|
| Well, I hear she has a military background.
|
| Military, eh? Leave this to me.
|
| I just want to hug it...
|
| NAME AND RANK, SOLDIER!
|
| Sir! Locrian Sergeant Tear Grants, Seventh Fonist of the Oracle Knights, sir!
|
| Told you that'd do the trick.
|
| Huh, which I could get my soldiers to respond like that.
|
| Well maybe if you didn't use them as ammunition...
|
| Oh! Um...sorry.
|
| Wow Tear, you really spaced out there. Never figured you as the type to go all girly-girl over something.
|
| It's...it's perfectly normal for a woman to like cute things.
|
| Heh. I'm more interested in strong warriors then cute animals, myself.
|
| Really? Why are you still with Hix then?
|
| Hey, he'll be the best yet one of these days. You just watch.
|
| I'd love to.
|
| ...miss Asellus, you really should leave. Heavy's time is over.
|
| Oh, don't let me stop you sweetheart. Go right ahead and keep interviewing these lovely ladies.
|
| ...
|
| So, Tear, you're a newcomer to the DL, and you'll be facing off against fellow newcomer Argilla. How much do you know about your opponent? Do you think going in without full intel on her will come back to haunt you?
|
| Hmm, well, she won't know any more about me than I do about her, so it will be a mutual weakness. I'd rather be fighting someone with a record to review, of course, but I'll have to make do and see if I can't surprise her more then she does me.
|
| I hear she turns into a demon and eats people with her breasts.
|
| ...
|
|
|
|
|
| And I'm suddenly very glad that we booked Tear instead of her. I don't even want to know what Kirby would look like after copying THAT.
|
| ...
|
| Snake? Ew. Just...ew.
|
| Yeah I think I even squicked myself out with that one.
|
| ???
|
| Moving on, um, Tengaar, your opponent is also someone who will be fighting for the first time. Thoughts?
|
| From what I understand, Kira just sticks pointy things into her opponents, and that's all. My Earth Rune should take care of that.
|
| Hehe.
|
| ...and if she has any unexpected surprises?
|
| *snerk*
|
| I'm sure whatever she's got won't be too much for me to take.
|
| Hehehehe!
|
| Ahahaha!
|
| What the heck is wrong with those two?
|
| Just ignore them, their minds are in the gutter.
|
| ???
|
| ...can I hug it? Please?
|
| You prolly shouldn't.
|
| ...I think I officially hate middle. Dedede, can you see the Middles out and send Kirby for the Lights?
|
| Uh, sure. Ladies, come with me.
|
| Hmm, stick around for Light, or follow those two out?
|
| Asellus, please leave.
|
| Hii~
|
 | Such a fascinating little creature.
|
 | Good morning Princess.
|
| Mmm, that settles that.
|
| *sigh*
|
| Hey, if you wanted me to leave, you shouldn't have booked so many beautiful women.
|
| Excuse me, but I'm a man.
|
| That's fine too.
|
| I...see...
|
| You're surprised, Rahal? She IS a mystic. And good morning Asellus, haven't seen you in awhile.
|
| You're looking good today, Emma. Keeping yourself in shape for the match?
|
| Of course. Wouldn't do for the leader of the Female Scientists Brigade to embarrass herself in the arena.
|
| You two know eachother?
|
| Green haired heroines.
|
| Terra put together a club, we both signed up on a lark.
|
| Okay. Emma, you're better known as a thinker then a fighter, and Estella is rumored to be a very powerful mage. Think you have what it takes to beat her?
|
| If she were that powerful, she wouldn't be rotting in Light, would she? I know there's something in my skill set that can handle her. You'll excuse me for not saying what though, just in case she watches this before the match.
|
| Of course. And Rahal, you're normally a mounted fighter, yes? Will your combat ability suffer from being separated from your horse?
|
| It's Dragon Horse, and yes while it's true I'm at my best when on Flail's back, I'm more then capable of handling myself on foot.
|
| Word is that your partner is the stronger of the two of you in a straight-up, and he lost his first fight. That shaking up you confidence any?
|
| That fight had questionable officiating, and Roog...likely just wasn't paying attention. Fighting isn't all about who has more muscle.
|
| Well, you're right about that at least.
|
| Hah, that's just what scrawny little wimps tell themselves to feel better about not having the muscle to play with the big boys.
|
| I have grenades that would disagree with that statement, Dedede.
|
| It's never a good idea to be on the other side of an argument with grenades.
|
| Well, I suppose that...
|
 | Hey, listen!
|
| *twitch*
|
| We've got the cross genre dimension portal open, you losers can go home and give me my show back now.
|
| Your show? Last I checked, I own everything even remotely related to this program.
|
| Huh, well, that's good. This place is pretty fun sometimes, but we've got our own tournaments to get back to.
|
| Not to mention kingdoms to get back to.
|
| Aw, going so soon? I was hoping to get to know you a bit better, Zelda.
|
| ...where's the portal, I'll show myself out.
|
| Hey, you can always hit on the redhead or something.
|
| Not likely. She knows better.
|
| Whelp, c'mon Kirby, we've got a portal to catch!
|
| Byyyeee~
|
I, Kazan, bid you welcome to the RPG Dueling League, dedicated to the art of pitting the greatest warriors of the RPG Multiverse against each other in honourable combat! Within lies the greatest showcase of fighting talent you will ever lay your eyes upon!