 | Thank Deus we've got our regular staff back. And I can't believe I said that and meant it.
|
 | They got vodka in the cameras! How drunk do you have to be to get vodka in the cameras?
|
 | Not drunk enough, if you're smart enough to open the shutters and too dumb to avoid wasting perfectly good booze.
|
 | So, Morte... how was your date?
|
 | I'd rather not talk about it. Turns out she was a generic NPC, and two hours of "The Fire Cave is to the east!" is all I could stand.
|
 | Really? So you actually wouldn't date someone if they didn't have a brain in their head?
|
 | Of course not. However, there are other things than dating...
|
 | That's enough of that. We're a family show.
|
 | Yes, Behind the Scenes, fun for the whole psychotic family. I'm co-host and hired muscle Gilgamesh, along with the big boss Nate, Ultros on the cameras, and Morte... doing whatever it is he actually does here.
|
 | Insulting for fun and profit, mostly.
|
 | In any case, here's the star of our show, Miss Chisato Madison!
|
 | Hello. Let's get started and start the show. Our first guest is that ever-maligned conifer of chaos, the pine of pain, X-Death.
|
 | Hah! Respect at last!
|
 | You would think so, but no.
|
 | So, how the devil are you?
|
 | I've been doing rather well. Enkidou's training has been going well.
|
 | Enkidou! He's my minion!
|
 | Well, since my minion decided to take a cushy television job, I've had to find someone to take his place.
|
 | Now, now, guilt trips will get you nowhere.
|
 | Fine. I will simply use my frustration as further power to defeat that impudent princess.
|
 | She's pretty tough, you know.
|
 | So am I.
|
 | Yeah. Sure. Whatever.
|
 | Why you...
|
 | *sigh* Don't make me get out the flamethrower again. Our next guest is back from a long hiatus, and is the so-called second Reigning Godlike champion this season. Hello, Piastol.
|
 | Hmmph.
|
 | You know, if you let your hair down and smirked a little more, you'd have a great Sephiroth impression.
|
 | HOW DARE YOU EQUATE ME WITH THAT HACK SWORDSMAN! I'M TEN TIMES THE DUELLER THAT FOOL IS! IT'S ABOMINABLE THE WAY I WAS CAST ASIDE!
|
 | I'm sensing anger issues from her.
|
 | Wow, Morte. It's no wonder the ladies are all over you.
|
 | Sarcasm's unbecoming for you, berk.
|
 | Since it's fairly obvious how you view your long stretch out of the arena, let's look forward. The Angel of Death against the Angel of Celestia. Fair matchup?
|
 | Of course not. I will tear him limb from limb, as I will any other angelic pretenders to my glory. This I vow.
|
 | She really hates SOLDIER-boy, doesn't she?
|
 | Come on, boss, you know why. Sephy won when she had her forced exit, and now she's coming back with him as the "true" champ.
|
 | He shall die.
|
 | OK... moving on, then. From the Angel of Death to the Silent Death. Hello, Crono.
|
 | *waves*
|
 | So, how are you doing?
|
 | *shrug*
|
 | So, how do you feel about your girlfriend losing?
|
 | :-(
|
 | Son of a submariner? What was that?
|
 | ???
|
 | Don't give me that, Carrot. I just heard your sad face as if you said it!
|
 | *shrug*
|
 | Are you sure you're all right, Ultros?
|
 | Yeah, you didn't happen to have your mouth open when you were emptying the cameras, were you?
|
 | I... but...
|
 | :-p
|
 | Aagh! Never mind!
|
 | (Thanks, Crono. The check's in the mail.)
|
 | *nod*
|
 | Our next guests are a package group - the two Budehuc brawlers. Hello, Emily, and wake up, Juan.
|
 | Hi!
|
 | Zzzz...
|
 | Wake up, lazybones! *THWACK*
|
 | Don't hit him!
|
 | ...Graah!
|
 | Cut it out! *SMACK*
|
 | Ow! What? I'm up, I'm up.
|
 | Ah, so the learner has become the master.
|
 | You better believe it.
|
 | Emily, why do you stick around with him? You're stronger, and a better dueller to boot.
|
 | He has some interesting theories on effortless effort. Besides, if I didn't watch over him, who would?
|
 | Just because I sleep doesn't make me a defenseless baby, you know.
|
 | No, it's the fact that you sleep in the middle of battle that makes you defenseless.
|
 | Zzzz...
|
 | Or the middle of conversations.
|
 | Just get him out of here, and good luck to the both of you.
|
 | Thank you.
|
 | You know, I've been thinking.
|
 | A dangerous situation, but go on.
|
 | We haven't used the catapult in a while, have we?
|
 | Not really.
|
 | Maybe we should test it out.
|
 | Sounds like a plan.
|
 | Hey, Chisato, guess what? I finally got back in! Maybe my luck's finally...
|
 | Test fire one.
|
 | ...changedddddd...
|
 | Looks like it works. Did you hear something?
|
 | Nope. Our final guest was supposed to be Lieza, but apparently she was a bit offended by our comments last week about Arc the Lad being full of generics. Well, all I have to say is this: If I had known it was that easy to keep you guys off the show, I would have insulted you months ago.
|
 | It makes it hard to keep the show going if you insult all the potential guests, you know.
|
 | Um, boss? You do actually watch the show, right? Insulting the guests is at least half of what the chief and the rest of us do. It's why you pay us, remember?
|
 | And on that pleasant note, let's shut down for another week. From all of us at BtS, good night and good luck in the arena.
|
 | ;-)
|
 | Stop doing that! |