 | So.
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 | Back to work.
|
 | Work? I'm surprised you know the term.
|
 | Not that you do much of anything.
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 | I work the most out of all of you!
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| You don't count, Odin, you don't have any legs.
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| I have legs!
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| Not for long! Gilgy?
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| ACH! MY APPENDAGES! I NEEEEEEEEEEED THOSE!
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| Then I guess you should have thought of that before Chisato asked me to cripple you.
|
 | Well said. Now now, Odin, hurry up and clean up all this blood, don't just sit there and pass out on us. Chop-chop!
|
| ...
|
| Wimp.
|
| Quite. Well then, now that we've had yet another successful Odin beating, let's get back to work. Vacation's over, folks!
|
| Very well. Guys?
|
| Guests are stabled and anxious for interviewing.
|
| Cameras are a go.
|
| I've been gnawing on Odin's leg. Mmmm...Half-Elf...
|
| That's right, dear readers! Your favorite repository of mindless violence, cannibalistic carnage, and the eternal torture of all the RPG characters you hold dear is back! Welcome to the first week of Season 37! We have some new blood in, and plenty of old blood willing to spill it on the arena grounds! And on thate note, let's welcome our Godlikes, Sephiroth and Violetta!
|
 | Good to be back.
|
 | I'm ready to kick some ass!
|
| Easy there, Sparky. Sephiroth isn't just some bunch of whiny brats, you know.
|
| Whatever. I'll whip this silver-haired punk and show Emelious that I'm worthy of him.
|
| What's the deal with you and that whiny Emo-fest anyway?
|
| YOU SHUT UP! You just don't understand him the way I do. Plus he's gorgeous!
|
| Not exactly an uncommon trait here, lady.
|
 | She's right, you know.
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
 |
|
| Oh my.
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 | Oh, new girl. Come along with me, there's plenty more where that came from....
|
| What the hell was that?
|
| Better not to ask, dude.
|
| Yes.
|
| Why wasn't I included in the...?
|
| I know! They totally ignored me too.
|
| "They"?
|
| Bad things happen to those who ask certain questions. Just remember that. C'mon, people, where are the Heavies?
|
 | This idiot got us lost!
|
 | What do you expect? I've never been here before.
|
| Speaking of that, how does it feel to finally be in the DL?
|
| Great. Now people will get a taste of Arc the Lad that doesn't involve the main characters!
|
| I'm sure everybody is dying from excitement.
|
| What do you mean by that?
|
| C'mon, dude, your series is toast. Elc and Arc are about the only thing you've got going for you.
|
| Better a has-been than a never-was, skull boy. Or shall we talk about how quickly -your- game lasted in the DL?
|
| Oooooh!
|
| Burn from the monk-guy!
|
| But...see...the thing here is...
|
 | NINJA INTERRUPTION TECHNIQUE!
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| THE FACE! NOT THE FACE! AAAAAH! ALL I HAVE IS FAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCE!
|
| That was pretty cool.
|
| Thanks. Now, to continue my random murders! NINJA VANISH!
|
| Well, I think we can safely say that nobody expected that.
|
| Am I going to get to talk at al-
|
| Nobody likes a blabbermouth, dear.
|
 | Zzzzzzz....
|
 | I could't wake him up.
|
| Okay, who the hell booked the coma patient and Galactic Messiah Boy?
|
| Probably Odin, he didn't want to be threatened in the intellectual department.
|
| Burble.
|
| Uh-huh. So can we get somebody else out here, or what?
|
 | I heard there was some single rich guy here? Is that true?
|
| Oh, not the gold-diggers again.
|
| Hiiiiiii Naaaaate! <3 Let's have a little chat somewhere else...who's this guy? Get the hell out of my way!
|
| Zzzz..gruh...huh? NOT ASLEEP! RAGE! KILL! DESTROY!
|
| NOT MY DOLL! YOU RUINED IT! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!
|
| And Juan achieves his greatest accomplishment: Making a little girl cry.
|
| It's like music to my ears.
|
| We really need to hook that guy up with some coffee.
|
| Later.
|
| C'mon, guys! The plot of XS3 is totally awsome, you just have to see it my-
|
| NINJA DESTRUCTION OF HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE PEOPLE!
|
| OH ME HE'S TEARING INTO MY AA;DKGHA;DGDSA;A;LGSDEATH
|
| I owe you one.
|
| Mysterious!
|
 | Wow! 'Ole Frank sure wasn't expecting to see a fellow Ninja around here! Nice to meet you!
|
| I..I think I left my ninja oven on. Bye!
|
| Seems like a nice guy. Wonder if's ever tried secret South American Ninja training before...
|
 | Does it involve looking like a total dork? Because you've got that part down beautifully.
|
| People who are CC characters shouldn't insult personal appearance. So, Frank. Think Draggy can stop you?
|
| No way! Frank has been training extra hard ever since he found out he was in! My Sushi Sword shall rend all my foes asunder! Plus, I polished my antenna-light for extra vision!
|
| Every moment of him speaking is agony.
|
| Mind..hurts...
|
| With my secret Ninja snowball techniques, I cannot fail!
|
| Can't..take it..RAAAAAARRRR!
|
| MY SPLEEEEEEN!
|
| Whew. Thank goodness that's over.
|
| Good to be back in the swing of things. Odin's down for the count, Morte got his comeuppance, there's a high body count, and what's more we I even managed to finally get all the sand out of my swords!
|
| I told you beach volleyball wasn't played that way.
|
| I don't play by any rules. Not even my own.
|
| I'm taking your badge, Gil. You're off the force.
|
| Badge?
|
| ....Sorry, just getting caught up in the moment. Are we about done here?
|
| Looks like it. See you next week, Readers, and until then, enjoy the return of the DL! This is the surviving BtS crew, signing off!
**********
|
 | Think we should tell Nate and Chisato that they put the week two light guests on this week?
|
 | After they snubbed us, a former Heavy finalist and the leader of the DL police? Pass.
|
 | *Sniff* No one cares about Starky..
|
 | *Sniffs* I understand your pain, Starky. Come here for a hug!
|
| I...
|
| That is a space alien being hugged by the Loligoth of the Serengeti.
|
| I'm going to go get smashed and hope Mindheal fixes the worst of it.
|
| Way ahead of you. |
Signors, welcome to the RPG Dueling League, an online community dedicated to pitting the fiercest, most PASSIONATE competitors from the RPG world against each other in a battle of fighting skill, and then democratically deciding who wins. I am your humble host, Morrie, and it is my pleasure to introduce you to the Arena, or as I like to call it, THE MONSTROUS PIT!!!